One thing that I have learned is that one does not have to examine their childhood or understand the source of their behavior problems in order to solve problems. In fact, looking into the past is a distraction, because there is really no way to know WHY a person acts the way they do. Just think, if we had to know the WHY of every behavior, we would probably never change because that is an impossible mission.

For example, when I feel anxiety, I don't have to examine my childhood to resolve it, I can do that without knowing the cause. If the only way to resolve adult problems was to find their source in one's childhood, I think most people would stay pretty sick because that is unrealistic goal.

Additionally, I was not raised in an affectionate home and was never exposed to such behavior. But I did not have to examine my childhood to change that; all I had to do was adopt affectionate behavior.

I do know that bringing the trauma of the past into the present is not productive and does nothing to make the present great.

AA does not advocate delving into one's childhood at all. They don't want to hear your crap. What they focus on is changing PRESENT behavior, just as does Dr Harley.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101