Originally Posted By: kstockett
Long story short: I had an affair. I confessed, exposed, AP moved away. Two years later I caught my husband in two affairs within 3 months. The second time I caught him on top of her in the park. This was 2.5 years ago.

Both OW still live/work here. I do not worry about him starting up with them. I DO worry about him not telling me if he sees them because I want honesty in our marriage. My BIG THING is that I trigger horribly, traumatically, when I see them - especially the one I caught him with, so I WANT TO MOVE!
But he doesn't want to. He has suffered enough with my affair and his career is important to him. It's one made of contacts and we've been here 21 years so he would lose a lot.
I feel unloved. He'll do almost anything for me but this.
I feel like I'm still being punished for what I did. He feels I want to punish him for wanting to move.

How do we get on the same team? I cannot accept this because it feels like I'm compromising myself to stay in the marriage. Am I wrong on this?

Dr. Harley recommends moving after an affair alot. Especially in your situation where there have been 3 affairs between the 2 of you. I'm sure you'll remained triggered. Why wouldn't he want to protect you from this?

What about writing Dr. Harley and have him talk with your H?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.