Originally Posted by BrainHurts
Have you closed all your Plan B holes? You have blocked all his ways to contact you? No more social media? No more being around when the kids face time with him?

HI BH - thanks for your post.

Yes all holes plugged. No social media or face time. I have asked he call the home phone to speak to the children so I dont have to hear his voice.

Today BF dropped DD of this morning and then took DS to his football trial at a big local club. When he dropped DS off, instead of dropping him off at the end of the drive as he usually does, this time he caught me as I opened the door and was stood on the doorstep. I said hi and went to walk in the house and he tried to engage me in conversation about DS football trial. I said that sounds great, ok got to go bye, cut it short and walked in the house. BF looked downcast and walked off and said 'See you soon'. For the first time in years it was like I was in control of the situation, not him. It felt good.

That is the first time I have spoken to him or had any eye contact in 5 weeks. I stayed very calm and strong. However, I cannot get over how awful he looked. He has lost a ton of weight and gone grey overnight.

I couldn't help myself and asked DS if Daddy was ok? He said he keeps 'having moments' (this is what DS calls them) 4 or 5 times per day. I said what does he do when the his happens? DS said his chin wobbles and he looks really sad and asks for cuddles and sometimes he even cries.

He is clearly suffering, i am quite shocked. Maybe I am being naive. I thought he would be showing me that he is flourishing and rubbing it all in my face.

Maybe there is a tiny window of hope after all.