You really need to sit down with your children and tell them that you are much healthier having no contact with their father, which includes them telling you about their conversations. This is so you will be able to live with some sense of peace again. Hearing about him sends you into a spin. Plan B doesn't mean the relationship is over. It means until the relationship becomes healthy again, your emotional health is protected. The stress is going to wear you down.

When your kids want to talk with you about their conversations with their father, immediately hold up your hand and let them know you don't want to hear it. This is what it means to go dark. You aren't hearing about him or from him - just notes from your IM about when the children are to be with him. Plan B is about protecting yourself from the stress and chaos of the relationship as it is now. Please remind me. Did you write a Plan B letter to him specifying what it will take to get back together?


Married 1980
DDay Nov 2010

Recovered thanks to Marriage Builders