Thank you for your support and time Sugar Cane.

I have no idea how it will go tomorrow. I can just do my best. I need to have a plan either way and now feel comfortable with taking control.

BF has been texting me lots, mainly about the kids but other stuff too. I received a text from him at 1am this morning, I think he may have been drinking.

I get a call from sister this morning, say that she is very worried as there is a video on social media thats concerning. When I tried to find out what social media site and who, she was just being very dramatic and saying I don't know but it is just out there and then said for god sakes be a mother CoolB! I was really taken aback when she said that and I am so upset and hurt she would say that and then put the phone down on her. She left me a nasty voice message saying how I didn't have the courage to answer her phone call and that she was letting me know as she thought I should know as I was the mother and she found it very worrying, and that she had been sounding board for me and not anymore and good luck with everything! Wow. I should never have gone to my family for support, I did it once before and it was thrown back in my face. Yes she had a point, but if she was so concerned she would have known what site and who posted it!! I was so panicked!

Anyway I spoke to BF and he had posted the video and made some [censored] and bull story how it was something to do with his new iphone but essentially the video was wrong and took it straight off. He was obviously drinking and got finger happy on fb. I have come off his fb so don't see anything.

It was a video of him and the kids jumping in the pool from the back showing the 2 kids bottoms.

Originally Posted by SugarCane

We always ask people this but your thread is so long I can't remember: have you asked your GP for any help with stress? Anti-depressants would make a big difference to your anxiety and sleeplessness. I know that you badly need relief from those things.

I did go and get some anti Ds from the DRs before but they made my mouth so dry after 3 months taking them I stopped them. I am feeling much better this week, so I am going to give it another week and see how I feel, but I am sleeping now and working and the kids are in school so able to look after myself better.

Thanks all.

Last edited by Coolbeginnings; 07/07/20 07:06 AM.