Originally Posted by Coolbeginnings
Problem with the addiction is I have been in denial about his drinking for 3 reasons.

1. He is never a nasty drunk, his caring loving side comes out when he is drinking. He is so affectionate and loving. For him to give up drinking makes me wonder if I will never see this side again? I can't cope with all the other side.

Often like that; affectionate and loving when high and angry when not. Once he has gone through rehab, he will be different. No more violent mood swings.

Originally Posted by Coolbeginnings
2. I enjoy drinking too, not a lot but now and again a few glasses, and I know that if he stops i must do aswell.

You cannot drink in front of him for at least the toughest part which is going to be a year and the alcohol supply needs to be thrown away (his place) or locked up (yours).

Originally Posted by Coolbeginnings
3. That if I ask him to stop and he wont that it will be the end of us.

That's true, you cannot compete with an addiction and he will only stop if he decides to.

Originally Posted by Coolbeginnings
However, I am feeling strong and ready to face this. I have a watched a few videos ect on how to deal with it, I am going to ask him if he thinks he has a problem drinking first, if he agrees then I will ask him to do the AA (he never went before) or go into a 28 day rehab program? Offer him my love and support to do this with him. If he doesn't agree then go to Plan B frown

I would go directly to the rehab option, don't mess about. You are too close to giving up for AA to work.

3 adult children
Divorced - he was a serial adulterer
Now remarried, thank you MB
(formerly lied_to_again)