I have lost any hope to turn this situation around.

There are too many issues, and with what he has to offer now it would be a miserable future.

I find him such a humiliating partner does that make sense? I find this whole ordeal completely humiliating in front of everyone. At this stage of my life mid 40s most of not all of my friends are sorted. Yes they have issues but none as bad as this.

I feel nothing for him. For a few weeks now I have never felt so flat, not depressed just flat. All his techniques worked on me before, but now they don’t. I did feel sorry for him before, but now I don’t. Mainly just anger and disbelief that he has put the children and I through this debacle.

If he won’t even admit to taking the drugs, he is hardly going to admit to going to rehab? I have sort of accepted it’s over and keep my head down and just plough.