Originally Posted by Coolbeginnings
Also spend a lot of time feeling incredibly guilty about him not seeing the kids. I guess I will get use to that?

You would expext HIM to feel incredibly guilty for putting his substance abuse before his family. But that my dear is a futile hope. He is just biding his time, untill you grow weak, all the while keeping you engaged and wondering, hoping... And he is trying to speed up the Process by guilt-tripping you.

If you don‘t react as expected, he Will turn it up a notch by whooing you with gifts, a promise of better behaviour and hints of marriage.

Eventually you cave in and he will manage to show his best behaviour for a few days, all the while feeling resentfull that you are Unreasonable, coming beTween him and his addiction. Untill the urge becomes too much, or untill he gets bored without the excitement of artificial stimulation aka drugs and alcohol.
Then he will treat you badly and/or pick a fight, so that he can eventually retreat to his drugs and alcohol cave and blame you in the process.

Then rinse and repeat.

You‘ve been there. The best predictor of future behaviour is past behaviour.
So, now you can predict his next moves.
No need to thank me for providing the crystal ball. grin

me, DH
all the children