HI everyone.....well last nite I got a phone call from WH's mom. Of course it wasnt long before we were talking about him.

Anyway, she made me so mad. I know she loves her S , but she started telling me how I never went anywhere with WH, never let her babysit the kids when they were small. She might as well said right to my face, your also to blame for his leaving. She said i took it personally that you never let me look after the kids. I said dont take it personally, i never let anyone look after my kids. Its just me, Im an overprotective mother, and very nervous where my kids are concerned.

Anyway, i then sort of lost my temper. I said, look i am the victim here, he's done all this, i didnt do nothing, i was a perfect wife the last two years. I think you should face the facts, he has hurt me and the kids, lied and cheated on me twice, he has done the wrong not me.

She then said well people change and fall out of love, and fall in love again. UUGGGGGGGGGG!!!

Anyway, we both calmed down and changed the subject.

Here's where it gets interesting. I know i should not have said the following, but i just couldnt help it.

Well i am just gonna move on now, actually I am dating someone (i'm not). Also, I said, I've got a job, as a waitress, so i will be meeting new people (job hasnt really come through).

I was just so mad. I know she will tell him what i said.

I guess you could say i LB'd to WH through his mom.....yikes

anyway, thanks for listening, opinions appreciated
A/C0810

Ok , so ya got alittle out of control <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Your right she does love her son and I am sure she is upset with the situation , and is showing it in a bad way ...

MY 2 cents (and I could be very wrong here so disregauard if this is not something you consider)

I would call her back and 1 )apoligize (sp?) for thew anger .2 ) explain you didn't mean the things you said(OM ect.)

Then I would tell her you understand her protecting her son and wanting to belive in what he is doing and saying , also that you are aware that maybe you where not PERFECT but it does not justify him in the actions in witch he took , that HIS CHOICES where very damaing to you and his children ...

Then what ever else , maybe saying that you are /where (I do not know) willing to WORK on the M .

Ok thats my take , sorry that one is hard for me cause me and MIL are best freinds and she stuck by my through all and disowned her son for that peroid of time ,,, and NEVER would want to see speeak or even look at OW ever no matter if we D or not .

Take care and be well ,3

Dear A/C Hugs to you

Don't dwell too long on what you said to MIL. You were okay.

Personally, I think I would let that one lie for a few days. So what if H thinks you've got a b/f & a job, is that not what the outcome of moving on is supposed to be in his warped mind? Wait & see how he reacts will he become territorial or he may 'act' relieved, but inside sickened at the thoughts of you with another man - tadah that is a real wake up call.

On the grounds of lieing to MIL - don't worry if she is the endearing kind she'll understand in the long run.

Yep Wake Up Call to WS - you are freed by his actions to go out with other men - if it comes to a point where you need to tell H something, simply admit that you are genuinely frightened of being single in the future, and desire a steady reltionship with a man, to be your friend, lover, partner, husband and father to your children, and that you do wish it was possible to be him, sharing the children's and your lives, supporting, nurturing and loving each other.

Don't know if I'm making any sense to you, I am not so wise myself. I do know my WH was sickened to the pit of his stomach "can't bare the thoughts of another man touching you....would you really let another man into our lives...put my son to bed..." when he realised I was not going to remain celibate for the rest of my life.

On the jobs front, he was excited that former dependent woman, would become independent, actually gave interview advice and contacts list. The end got 3 gorgeous job offers, did the maths salaries would not make enough difference maybe &#8364;40 extra once childcare was paid for. But in achieveing that much I was raised in his eyes.

A/C I wish I could say something to make you feel better, I am a firm believer in chocolate these days.

Take care of yourself
Best Thoughts
Ktulu

<small>[ September 25, 2004, 10:00 AM: Message edited by: pemberley ]</small>