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Faith
me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
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There's a story on MRO, and other current and planned Mars explorations, in last months Astronomy mag.
I think it was last month AM. I have so dang many mags I forget what I read in what...
"Never forget that your pain means nothing to a WS." ~Mulan
"An ethical man knows it is wrong to cheat on his wife. A moral man will not actually do it." ~ Ducky
WS: They are who they are.
When an eel lunges out
And it bites off your snout
Thats a moray ~DS
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Cool 2l,
What a neat website that is!
"The actions you speak are louder than your words!"
Author unknown
"Miracles are seen in light."
From "A Course In Miracles".
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(((((Everyone))))))
Thank you for your replies. Yes, the one thing I do know right now is that others have not only survived, but used the experience as a new beginning of something even better than they ever could have imagined...either personally or for the good of mankind. That does give me peace.
I think my present downward spiral comes from the fact that I have been married to my WH for 30 years...we've lived all but three in the same place. I can't turn a corner, hear a song, or even go to a store without reliving it again as I did with him. I think I might be someone needing an entirely new start...away from all of the memories. I don't know, and I'm not in a hurry to make any decisions....(and certainly not in the correct frame of mind.) For now, I am in SURVIVAL mode, and I'm taking it one minute at a time. I pray a lot, read a lot, and I'll advance from here in time.
WH numbs himself with alcohol...it's one of 2 issues that had him leave the house. It's just hard when you love someone because you WANT to help. But.......this is not my problem to solve. I can't do it.....I didn't cause it, I can't control it, and I can't cure it. When you've given yourself to someone, that's a tough reality to face. He has to want to help himself, and unfortunately he's so fogged up and/or plastered that he can't get his act together. I have no idea what the future holds...but then again, does ANYONE? Nope! We don't know when illness, accidents, etc. may happen. It's time for me to look at life in a different way.
Thanks for the kind words and the insights you all continue to provide...all I wanted to say is that reading your posts have helped me get through some really rough evenings...and you have helped me because you cared enough to share the things you felt.
SAR2
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Appy, I am hoping you are still around.
Faith
me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
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hi all,
what a day on the boards yesterday, i just read the thread about why FWS tell BS not to worry. i think i'm kinda glad i was not around when that was happening.
and i missed all the posts here and although i did read them, i'm too exaushted to post much more, even though some of it was fun stuff.
i hurt my back, i'm not sure how. i've never had back problems before, i literally could not get out of bed or dressed without help. I didn't get to work, and i am trying not to worry about it right now but then again, yesterday was my last day at work before a 2 week vacation and there was much i had to do!!! in the afternoon, i was at least able to call and hand off the most important things. i am still considering trying to get my work lap top home so i can take care of one thing that really needs my attention. i'm starting to figure that is just not going to happen.
i am sitting in front of this computer right now, so i am obviously a bit better, THANKFULLY!!!
i just wish i knew what caused this. i am seeing someone today that will hopefully help. anyone ever hear of MAT, Muscle Activation Theorpy? I used to weight train with this guy who is now doing that. i trust him very much, very smart guy in the area of physical well being. My H is driving me over at noon (yes, my H knows this peson too and is in agreement with trying this treatment out). I sure hope it helps. The kids are a bit worried, i took off the next 2 weeks so we could do a bunch of fun summer stuff before they go back to school and a lot of it requires a healty body!!!
anyway... HI's to you all. I plan to stay far away from computer during the next 2 weeks. I have literally written down a prayer list of people from here. I will be praying for so many here by name as well as a blanket prayer for all those hurting.
see ya in 2 weeks.
(p.s. don't know why i am just pointing in gc's campfire thread here, seems the safest place right now. thanks for letting me sit around the campfire this past week)
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I'm here tonight. It seems quiet. I read the stuff on other threads earlier today, and it made me sad even though I wasn't able to see most of the bad things that were said. The people on both sides are good people who got triggered and who got even more hurt.
I dunno if Aphelion's reading this weekend or not, but if you are, I've got a drink addressed to your solar location on it.
And some fresh-made cookies that I decided to bake, too. I don't want to eat 'em all myself, you know, so if you could help a girl out, I'd appreciate it.
Sunny Day, Sweeping The Clouds Away...
Just J --
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Alright folks. Things can certainly get worse, if we let them. Therefore:
Ian Dury and the Blockheads: "Hit Me with your Rhythm Stick"
"In the deserts of Sudan
And the gardens of Japan
From Milan to Yucatan
Every woman, every man
Hit me with your rhythm stick.
Hit me! Hit me!
Je t'adore, ich liebe dich,
Hit me! hit me! hit me!
Hit me with your rhythm stick.
Hit me slowly, hit me quick.
Hit me! Hit me! Hit me!
In the wilds of Borneo
And the vineyards of Bordeaux
Eskimo, Arapaho
Move their body to and fro.
Hit me with your rhythm stick.
Hit me! Hit me!
Das ist gut! C'est fantastique!
Hit me! hit me! hit me!
Hit me with your rhythm stick.
It's nice to be a lunatic.
Hit me! Hit me! Hit me!
Hit me! Hit me! Hit me!
In the dock of Tiger Bay
On the road to Mandalay
From Bombay to Santa Fe
Over hills and far away
Hit me with your rhythm stick.
Hit me! Hit me!
C'est si bon, mm? Ist es nicht?
Hit me! hit me! hit me!
Hit me with your rhythm stick.
Two fat persons, click, click, click.
Hit me! Hit me! Hit me!
Hit me! Hit me! Hit me!
Hit me!
Hit me!
Hit me! Ow!
Hit me!
Hit me!
Hit me! hit me!
Hit me (x5)
Hit me! Hit me! Hit me"
-ol' 2long
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Sorta along those lines... ...a song I really like but never could figure out why (mostly the music, at the time...):
Freur, "Doot-Doot"
"What's in a name?
Face on a stage
Where are you now?
Memory fades, you take a bow
Here in the dark
Watching the screen
Look at them fall
The final scene
And we go doot
Doot doot
Look at them fall
Flicker and fade
Gone are the screams
I put them to bed, now they are dreams
And we go doot
Doot doot"
Weaver: What was that mp3 download site you use? iTunes doesn't have this one...
-ol' 2long
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I have really mixed feelings about this one... I heard this song on NPR about 5 years ago. When my DD got Napster on her iMac, back when it was free, I downloaded it then. I remember playing it for my W 2 hear, telling her "It's kinda corny, lyric-wise, but I really like the musc". She listened 2 the whole thing, and said that "it's very nice, ac2ally." The 2nd A started sometime around then - ac2ally before that. I couldn't find the song again after the fire at our house, even though I looked pretty hard after we got the computers back from the restoration people (they got wet when the fire department doused the house). And all the searches I did on the internet came up empty, except for the lyrics. ...until 2day. The band changed names or something, from "Control Freq" 2 "Barcelona", or it was done by them or something like that, but even that isn't listed on iTunes. Had 2 go 2 Static Revenger 2 download it. ...imagine my chagrin 2 find that the song was used in some reality TV show about Britney Spears. Please, folks! Don't ruin that song for me by telling me ANYTHING about the context in which it was used. I don't want 2 know!!! ("B.S." is nearly my least favorite life form on this planet!!!!). And besides, I "found" that song before she did!!! I've posted the lyrics before, so I won't again. Look them up! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> ...then download them and we'll all sing it 2gether around gc's bonfire, with him on the guit-fiddle!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> -ol' 2long
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2long, I always use Bearshare, the free version. It's the only one I am familiar with. Just make sure you have a dang good virus protector installed on your 'puter.
Didn't read anyone's post, just caught this questions from 2long.
Gray, no need to be jealous anymore - update
Date didn't go too well. Just made me miss Dan more. Nice guy but I wanted to drive myself home because I was in tears by the end of the night, wishing he was Dan and feeling so incredibly disloyal.
Anyway -
I spent the night and most of today in jail. I had four glasses of wine and got pulled over on my way home from the place we met at.
Blew .12 on the breathalizer and spent 12 hours in the tank. I swear I thought I was in ******.
I don't weigh much, so of course it didn't take much for me to get a drunk driving. My first.
I really never thought it could get any worse. Well guess what, it did.
Called a pastor when I got home and cried for half an hour on the phone while he prayed and talked to me.
I have to be in court Tues morning bright and early for the plea.
Pastor Lou says I should plead guilty. And to go see him at church tomorrow.
What a drag.
There was a young girl, a baby of about 21 in the tank with me. She cried for about three hours, thought my heart would break for her. They were so mean to her, pretty little thing she was too. When they brought her in they threw her in that cell, I mean THREW her in and didn't even give her a mat for that concrete floor.
I now know where evil lives. I hate cops.
I literally thought I was in a torture chamber. They wouldn't give me a drink of water, knowing how thirsty and dehydrated I must be. Wouldn't give me an aspiran, or a phone book, even though I could not remember a phone number to get someone to come in a post bail.
They had a blinding light on in that tank all the way across the ceiling and wouldn't dim it all night. I can't even tell you what that was like.
Lord have mercy on those cops. I worry for their souls. The power of the badge is truly a scarry thing.
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Oh, weaver!
I'm so sorry. ...I don't know about that side, but when I've been on jury duty there alway seem 2 be drunk driving cases because it's so hard 2 prove beyond a shadow of a doubt. Made me mad at the time, because the case I was almost called on was a pretty young gal who'd gotten on the freeway the wrong way and caused an accident because she had been drinking...
I'd ask others their opinion on what you should do.
Hope it goes okay.
-ol' 2long
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2long, I always use Bearshare, the free version. It's the only one I am familiar with. Just make sure you have a dang good virus protector installed on your 'puter. Ah! That's why I never downloaded it! It's for PCs! Bill Gates clones!!! I'm a Mac person. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> -ol' 2long
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Weaver, very sorry about the DUI. I will keep your sitch in my prayers.
Hey wanted to tell my friends on this thread I am taking a breather. My depression has gotten a good hold on me and I need to refocus. Too much pain here and I want to help too much. I won't be gone long, probably a week or so. Just long enough to refocus on work, home and my M. Not to mention spend some time with God and healing ME. I love you all. Appy, if you log in...you are in my prayers. You and 2long are such good men. GC, hugs to you too. All the rest of you know I love ya.
Faith
me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
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2long,
I called a friend of mine at customs tonight (I am a customs broker) who has worked in law enforcement and he said I should probably just plead guilty and be done with it.
I will try and talk to an atty on monday and see if I should try and get it reduced to impaired driving. But I don't hold out much hope in talking to an atty on Monday before the court date of Tuesday.
Whatever I end up "getting", the time in that cell was worse than any felony or misdemeanor (if that is what first offense would be) on my record.
I will never drive after drinking again. Believe me folks it is not worth being arrested and spending 12 hours in jail.
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Sorry to butt in, but Weaver... I'm so sorry that happened.
Just from what you wrote... are you not going to get a lawyer?
With all due respect to you and your Pastor, now is not the time to take legal advice from your Pastor!
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Shoot!
I can't find a downloadable version of Freur's "Doot doot" anywhere!
-ol'2long
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Weaver, do get legal counsel. You should be able to get a continuance in court for not having legal counsel.
Faith
me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
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Weaver: Download "Sweetest Day" by Control Freq, or Barcelona, or whatever they're calling themselves. Don't get the wrong idea, though. It's just a purdy song, and I know you like purdy stuff. I mean nothing inappropriate by it... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> -ol' 2long
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