Hey SLH,
Why don't you just go out and run through the sprinklers?
I bet Faithful could do that too !

SS

SLH, I will keep Ti's job sit in my prayers. Sprinklers? Sure I'll join ya. It is hot here too.

I know right away if my feelings will grow and if they are the guy for me and I have always felt deceitful when I have continued to date knowing full well that there was a possiblity of hurt for someone.

Wow. Very different from me, most of the time. It takes me years to fall in love. Once it happens, well, it's instantaneous, I think. But it has always, for me, been built upon a deep and lasting friendship.

But reading your previous post on how you and your beau are forced to take it slow because of the distance made me laugh out loud. As if...one could slow down love. If anything it speeds it up, because of the very nature of being forced to live in your imaginations for prolonged periods.

You're right, of course. The love is there. The distance forces us to have time apart. That clears out the emotional and biochemical pathways a little, and allows for slightly clearer thought. With four kids, at least two religions, two exes, a six hour drive between us, and various other items to consider, it's worth taking the time to think through how to get to a stable, long-term relationship. Because even though our in-love brains try to tell us it'll all be rose petals and smooches, I'm pretty sure that's not how it would actually look.

There would, after all, still be laundry to do.

Your very cute when in love!

*chuckle* Thank you. Penny has asked me to write about the various components of love (as in Helen Fisher's work on the subject) and how I'm experiencing them as a "class project." That'll be some interesting writing. There are lots of things that I don't share here or anywhere else, but to really do the subject justice, I'll have to delve into some of them. So I'll write, and HoFS will get to read it first and then we'll talk about what not to put out there in the public eye and then something will show up eventually.

And then everyone can comment on how someone else being in love affects their emotional states, and that will really get interesting! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

weather

Low seventies and humid here. Rained earlier; the first measurable rain in something like 2 months.

jobs

I'm glad Ti is thinking about 'em, SLH. I wish him well. Tukwila isn't cold. It's just horrifically damp and dark. I'd take a cold, bright Minnesota January day over Pacific Northwest gray any day.

Does anyone know where I put my extra sleep? I seem to have lost it....

I'll trade you all some of that hot for some of what I got. Our weather has turned bleak. Don't like bleak.

I've written a screed about dating three times. Never posted it. Blah, blah, blah.

Bottom line: leeching off of people to make yourself feel lovable is selfish and leaves you fragile. They go away.

SLH, hope Ti doesn't feel too terrible. Professional life comes with the implicit bargain - you get to leave .

GC

Too hot? I'm looking forward to a gorgeous Thanksgiving weekend, but the temperature won't break the 60 mark.....freezes here at night too. The trees have mostly lost their leaves and geese and other migratory birds are packing up quickly.

I'd actually be quite content if it never got warmer than 60 here. I do not like the heat. You can always put on another sweater in the cold....but once you’re naked in the heat, you can't get nakeder.

Okay, J -- what kind of industry is there in Minnesota? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> Maybe I should do a quick CareerBuilders or Monster search. It sure sounds nicer than the P NW.

I gotta say here though that Aphelion has helped us a lot in our job search. He's a great guy. For those wondering, he's doing somewhat better. He sincerely thanks everyone for their prayers.

As for DATING. . . / bump bump BOMP /

Maybe I should revamp my harangue on dating, or its definition thereof.

Dating = a relationship with expectations that lead to something greater and more fulfilling.

I am going out on a limb here and suggesting that perhaps what I meant wasn't necessarily dating at all. It was just male-female companionship, good friendship. Hmmmm. "Dating" was never really a word that crossed these friends' lips. It was my interpretation of such. Wrong, perhaps.

But then there is that whole line of thinking that men and women can't be just friends -- "the sex thing is already out there and the friendship is doomed" . . . but we won't even go there. . . <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

And y'all are right; "friends" can/does grow into something wonderful and beautiful. Ti & I had been best friends for 7 years before we even began "dating" (yes, with aforementioned expectations, etc).

Anyway, I'm confusing myself. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> The painkillers I've been taking for my back (had a run-in last week with a horse who thought he was a pogo stick) are making me loony and stupid. Y'all forgive my rambling, please. i gotta go hit the hay.


slh

Industry. Minnesota. Well, I don't live there anymore (I live in Maryland, where the industry is limited and appears to be related to highly classified scary stuff most of the time), but 3M is in Minnesota and so are a bunch of other ones. Uhm.

Graycloud (who lives in the Twin Cities) and Penny (who lives on the WI side of the Twin Cities suburbs) could probably both point you in the right direction. Penny's husband is an engineer who does (I think) medical diagnostic equipment design and manufacturing support.

SLH,
Last Saturday we helped on a marathon route. We filmed for security reasons - as we have done for about 10 years.

This is a shot of some of the runners - there were over 6,000.

Marathon

SS

Binder said:
I'd actually be quite content if it never got warmer than 60 here. I do not like the heat. You can always put on another sweater in the cold....but once you’re naked in the heat, you can't get nakeder.

Come on Binder, I thought you could "take the heat."

It's not so bad when you get used to it.
115 deg.........
The air shimmers, you can see the heat as well as feel it.
Feels like you just stepped into a blast furnace.
Wind doesn't help, it just sucks the moisture out of you.
You don't shiver at all - ever.

On the other hand, I kind of like 60 deg myself, now that I think about it.
(Isn't that about 15.5 or so? I was there in Edmonton when it changed over from F to C.)

Binder, I know why you don't come round as often, but you are missed. Both for wit, humor, and honesty.

I doubt if HE will come any time soon (probably not in the next two weeks.) I understand that we have the plan before us, and know the rules.

If he did come, he would express his love - and you would feel it. He would help, not harm.
It would probably be enough to propel you and I to do better.
May you (and I) be able to do it anyway. We need to, it's worth it.
This I know.

SS

SS, was that a local photo? I love the swaying green hills. Do you actually LIVE there? *sigh* I think I'd handle dry heat a lot better than this soggy-saran wrap heat here. Yech.

J, do you have any more pics of DD you could share with us?

How do you like Maryland? I have to admit, I've always been intrigued with the east coast; vivid changing seasons, gorgeous foliage, variations in topography, mountains and sea. Here in Houston (though not all of TX, by far) it is flat flat flat. We have a 7 month summer and then winter. "Fall" consists of maybe four hours of cool weather on perhaps the 2nd Thursday in November, if that. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> The only plus is Gulf. When I am brooding and melodramtic, I like to grab a beer and sit on the beach and think. Nothing like that briny sea air to scour the mind's slate and let you feel that anything is possible.

In an ideal world, I'd live near the mountains AND the sea. (I don't ask for much, huh?). Where would any of you live, if you had the chance?

Update: Ti's flying to Decataur (AL) and Tukwila (WA) early next week for personal job interviews. He also needs to resubmit more personal experience info for a few other jobs that are looking at him in Austin and other parts of TX.

Thanks for the prayers offered on our behalf. We do appreciate them.



slh

Binder, thinking of you.

Well...if it wasn't so darned expensive for housing I would say come here! We have mountain, desert and ocean all within an couple hours drive. On top of that we have great weather. And of course you would have a very good friend nearby. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

I must admit...that would be cool to see. I love observing the way the climate dictates the vegetation and the animal species and how they adapt to such an extreme temperature. To live in that heat day in and day out though........I think I'd rather have a thousand papercuts on my face.

The cold and snow opens up such a wide and range of activities. The winter here is to be celebrated and reveled in. To shut oneself inside and avoid the cold is absolutely tragic. I figure there is no such thing as bad weather, just bad clothing and equipment.

Having said that, there are some great places in Canada that would still offer both, but with a far less severe winter climate than where I live now. Many places in British Columbia have very mild climates in the valleys, with access to world class skiing in the upper elevations. I could see living in a place like that in the southern interior. Or even a place like Victoria. You'd be on the coast with likely the mildest climate Canada has to offer, yet you could drive to the hills to ski. I could go for that I guess.

SLH, I hope Ti finds a job in his field soon. I would hate that sort of uncertainty. I appreciate your selfless thoughts given that stressor in your life right now.

I’m still not divorced BTW. A small glitch in the paperwork has delayed things for a little while. As my situation is approaching its 2nd anniversary, my STBXWW is now trying to change the binding agreement so she gets to see the children every other weekend and further that she gets first refusal on any childcare I may require. As I cannot find a job in my agency that would let me work every other weekend, I would require a substantial amount of childcare (her) if she would be successful in this bid. Essentially my 50% parenting would be drastically reduced. I’ve informed my lawyer that this is the proverbial “line in the sand” and that I will resist this at all costs. I have a war chest saved just for these very situations.

Further, as Dr. OM was the vice-president of arguable the highest profile and most popular charity in this province and my WW was his subordinate I’m sure they would be loathe to see this go to an open trial with all the “messy stuff” go on the public record. I mean what if the press were tipped off regarding the proceedings and actually got their hands on the pictures of them leaving a cheap hotel together 2 days after spending Christmas with their families?

What I think is happening is the shine is going off on her fairy-tail life. She likely is realizing that her relationship with OM is implausible and now she is a middle aged single mom that doesn’t see her children on any weekends. Oh well.

Faithful follower, Just J, GC, AD et. al……howdy.

That says it all, Binder. You know being on this site has given me great respect for fathers especially men like you, Aphelion, Reborn Man, MortarMan et al...you put your kids needs first when your wives didn't. Stick to your line in the sand.

Thank you for that FF, the validation is appreciated. We have a hockey tournament next month in a resort community nestled in the mountains about 3 1/2 hours west of here. What a wonderful family activity. She'll have to hear about it from the children. She doesn't get to attend any of them.

Speaking of which…..I have to have the kids in an arena tomorrow AM for a 6:30 practice…I had better get to bed!

Binder, I hope it goes your way.

So sorry for the continued problems.

Just so you know, I like winter stuff. We have done snow camping lots. The mountains provide winter fun for anyone that wants it.

It is nice that I don't have to plug in my car in the winter.

The heat has a strange draw, I find I can actually do well in it.

If I close my eyes, I can smell fall coming in E. Down along the river. It's in the air now, isn't it.

Ah, some parts of life are meant to be lived. Too bad there has to be all this other to put such a damper on it.

Yes, I hope you get all that she already agreed to. May it happen that way.

SS

Hello you fine people.

I'm too tired to do just about anything. My parents are visiting, helping me with some house stuff. Wish I could tell a story. Too tired. Gonna lay down my head now.

GC OUT.

Hello you fine people.

Hey, that's the way I feel about you!

Sweet dreams - and may the best sawdust win.

SS

Faithful,
Sorry for the added stress on your thread. You come here for help and get........ that.

I hope you know that most of us appriciate you, even if a few don't.

How was this last weekend? And, are you able to work normally, or is it still hard?

SS

Hi SS! It's ok, when you open yourself up on a public forum you get a few of those. DS was sick over part of the weekend and WH worked both Sat and Sun so it was hectic. I still can't fully concentrate at work but doing better, thanks! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />