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Just got off the phone with my attorneys office. WH did it he filed the divorce papers.
Funny part is though there is no court date. I asked the attorney when do we go to court , he said there is no court date. I asked why? He said because they didn't request one.
I asked was this unusual he said yes but it happens sometimes.
Why would they not request a court date? I don't understand this...
We do have court on Jan.11 for a resolution meeting due to my LS papers. He said we will meet at court with him and his attorney and discuss what we both want and if we should leave this as LS or go for divorce.
I'm not sure what to do now......
My mom thinks not court date was selected because he wants a reaction out of me..... I don't know but I do know it makes no sense.....
I knew this would probably happen but it still hurts no matter how I tried to be prepared.....
Last edited by hurtinginokla; 02/24/06 09:06 AM.
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Oh Hurting!
I'm so sorry that it's come to this...
{{{{Hurting}}}}
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Funny part is though there is no court date. I asked the attorney when do we go to court , he said there is no court date. Hurting, I'm sorry to hear this. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" /> It may be a date has not been set yet due to your H job, he has to figure a day he can take off of work. Lady
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Thank you Cat......
I still can't believe he is going to throw away our whole lives like this.... 24 yrs of marriage gone like that ...
It really hurts bad
Lady as far as that goes it really does not matter. All he has to do is ell them at work when he needs to be in town and they will get him back..... The court won't work around his scheduale he has to work around the judges...
Last edited by hurtinginokla; 12/28/05 01:00 PM.
BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
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{{{{{{{{hurtinginOK}}}}}}}}}} I am so sorry for your pain. I feel very bad for you. Don't read too much into the no date thing. Probably some sick strategy of the other Atty or something. I wish I could offer you something to hold on to. I will pray for you though and right now. All our love (the appropriate kind <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> ) pours out to you and others like you.
BS (Me) 43
WW or FWW 40
2 DS's 16 and 13
Married 21 Years
D-day 9/10/2005
Exposure 9/11/2005
False NC 9/11/2005
Discovery of Contact 12/23/2005
NC (Letter written Jan 2006)
Divorce Petition Filed Jan 2006
In a holding pattern.
Me Still Handing in there
Phil 4:13
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I still can't believe he is going to throw away our whole lives like this.... 24 yrs of marriage gone like that ... What do you mean? You are not divorced! This is hardly the end.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Mel ,
I wish I could believe that ..... My mom keeps saying its only a piece of paper and a lot of money wasted.... She still believe he will come home .... I want so much to believe it myself... But I have got to try and accept this just in case that never happens.....
BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
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How can you believe something that hasn't happened? Hurting, this is far from over, it is just part of the process. There is no difference in your situation today than there was yesterday. Seriously.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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(((Hurting)))
I just don't believe it is over yet either. My H and I were separated for over two years, papers drawn up several times, we were just to cheap to file. Everyone actually thought we were already divorced.
If your WH wants to D you, so be it. But that doesn't mean that you H is gone forever.
Me-41 BS (FWS) DH-41 WS (FBS) 2DD's- 10 and 12 Married 15 years Separated for 2 years after my A Reconciled for 1 year before his A D-day for his A 8/23/05 WH moved out 9/16/05 Divorce final 1/23/07 Affair ended or month or so later My Story
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Mel,
I know your right, it just feels so final with him actually filing the papers.
I know its not done and over yet.... I wish I knew what to say or do at the mediation meeting... Do i go along with him or what ????
I don't want this divorce but how can I stop him???? I don't think I can ..... I don't know what to do
Jean, I know your right as well , thats what my mom keeps telling me .... Its only a piece of paper means nothing....
Last edited by hurtinginokla; 12/28/05 01:10 PM.
BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
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{{{{{Hurting}}}}}
It really doesn't make sense. All I know is I am tired of him continually breaking your heart. You are a good woman, and have done all to save your marriage, and I know you will continue to do your best whatever may happen. I wish I was there to give you a big hug. May God help you and comfort you Hurting.
Blessings,
Lady
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I aggree with Mel. Don't give up.
BS (Me) 43
WW or FWW 40
2 DS's 16 and 13
Married 21 Years
D-day 9/10/2005
Exposure 9/11/2005
False NC 9/11/2005
Discovery of Contact 12/23/2005
NC (Letter written Jan 2006)
Divorce Petition Filed Jan 2006
In a holding pattern.
Me Still Handing in there
Phil 4:13
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Hurting, During a LS, is it required that the other spouse countersue. Or is that only on a divorce filing?
Lady
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I don't want to give up ..... I just don't see what I can do now .....
Now I know I have to see him on Jan. 11 .... How am I going to handle that? I don't want to agree to a divorce but do I have any choices about it? Nope don't think so ....
I really don't know what else to do ....
BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
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No Lady its not required. After I filed the LS he had the divorce papers drawn up but decided against signing them.
So they answered the petition of LS and we came to an agreement. Now since he decided to file the divorce he didn't have to sign the LS papers but he is still has a court order against him to pay the CS and SS.
So basiclly we are in limbo until the 11 and its decided if it will be LS or divorce.... I know what my vote is but I don't think it will count much.... He can get this divorce without me agreeing....
I wonder if OW found out he didn't file it and pushed it some more.... The no court date thing still has me baffled though .... When they filed the LS we knew that day when the court date was. They set the court date the day its filed....
BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
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No Hurting, do not agree on divorce. Your attorney will know how to handle that. He knows you are trying to save your marriage, not divorce. He needs to tell the judge what your plans have been all along. You only filed for legal sep. because your H is having an affair, out of the house, and not taking care of any financial responsiblilities. But you never wanted divorce. You want him to come home and reconcile the marriage.
Lady
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Lady,
Thats what I am gong to say but I doubt it will make any difference. About all that will do is piss WH off even more but at this point who cares....
I don't know the law but I would think he could get the divorce without my agreeing.... I have no clue .... This is something i am going to find out for sure..
BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
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I don't know the law but I would think he could get the divorce without my agreeing.... I have no clue .... This is something i am going to find out for sure.. I don't know if he could either, but you keep your words. You will not agree to divorce. Lady
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oklahoma
i'm so sorry that this has happened
i know that no matter what anyone says, it still feels as though it is another nail in the coffin
it is the thing that i am dreading next and i don't know how i will deal with it
except i DO know I will not agree to the divorce...they can force it upon me but it will happen with me saying that i love my H and want to save my marriage
tell your lawyer this if it's how you feel
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{{{{HURTING}}}}
I agree with Mel on this one, it isn't over. I will keep you in my prayers. Don't give up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BS 48 me
WH 45
married 23 years
DDay JULY 2005
WH moved out Sept 2005 and moved in w/ow a month later
DD 28
DS 21
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