3 elderly sister share a house together. The first sister says" I am going upstairs to take a bath." 2 minutes later she calls down and says" Sisters was I getting in the tub or out of the tub?" Sister # 2 says"I don't know I will come up and check." Halfway up the stairs she calls down and says"Sister was I going up the stairs or coming down the stairs?" Sister # 3 wispers to herself" How pathetic, thank God I am not a scatterbrain like those 2, knock on wood" She proceeds to call up to sister # 2 and says"Wait right thewre and I will come check, but give me a minute, I have to answer the front door first!

Praying for you today Hurting.

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Hurting}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

You have many praying and thinking about you. Be strong.

Two older ladies who had been friends for over 50 years were playing cards like they had every Wednesday when one lady, exasperated at the mistakes the other lady was making looked at her partner and asked, "What is my name?" Her partner thought for awhile and eventually her face lit up and she said, "Mildred!" Then Mildred said, "Thank you, I'll try to remember now."



A police officer stopped a car travelling down the interstate for going dangerously slow. As he approached the vehicle he met with a group of little old ladies. He said, "Did you realize you were going 26 in a 55 mile speed zone?" She explained she was following the law by travelling under the speed limit on Rt 29. The police officer, understanding what was going on, then explained that the Route number was not the speed limit. He was going to let her go with a warning when he looked in the back seat at the frozen fearful expressions of the ladies. He asked what was the matter and the driver said, "Oh, we just turned off Rt 110."

Thinking of you today I hope all goes well.

.....me, too.... today and...tomorrow.

HUGS.

thank all of you for the prayers and well wishes, I will post as soon as I have had my call with Steve.

Also thanks for the all funnies I appreciate them they made me laugh.... Something I have needed to do for so long...

One more hour and the call will be made....

Hurting

Good luck hurting! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

He is really easy to talk to so don't stress about it.

Know that you are doing great! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Daisy

I just got off the phone with Steve....

Everyone was right he is very easy to talk to.. It went very well..

First off he was blown away by the divorce thing going so fast so he gave me a stratagy for dragging this out....

Basically just having my lawyer go in with what I want... Then when WH'S propsal comes back I am to say : This is all moving very fast and I need to time to consider all of these numbers. Stall Stall Stall... He says he that he thinks that this since it is between our laywers and not a true mediator is WH'S attorneys hope to make me cave and get it done. So he says no matter what is proposed tell them I need time to think it over....

He says basically stay in planb but when I do have to interact with WH do a modified planA. Let him know we can have a good marriage and we have the tools to do it once OW is gone...

He says from what he has heard that OW is very controling and WH will eventually tire of it... He says this affair has no chance of survival... Its only a matter of time...

He says they have more going out than coming in to maintain this affair. So he wants me to just keep stating the fact of I don't divorce and we can have a better marriage...

He says if this does come to divorce he believes that WH will reevaluate after the affair ends and after withdrawl will want to come back to me ( marriage)

He sees a lot of hope here. Just give it time....

He told me to make sure that when I say about having time and things going to fast to not be vindictavie about , be humble (not a doormat) about how I feel. Let WH know this is hurting me and not to rush things....

He says the bubble will burst no doubt about it.... He told me I know you feel like a doormat and very hurt but remember this is not the man you married ..... Look at him as a different person right now...

He said that I have been getting good advice from this board and to keep it up.. Maybe this conversation with Steve is the miracle I have been praying for... He gave me so much insight into what is happening in my life. He says WH is truly conflicted and is basically living for the moment... It will all come to an end that I have to believe... He told me when it ends I want you to still be there with your love to help him...

So now I feel a whole lot better. Still scared but I feel like this could still turn out good....



Hurting

Don't you just love him (STEVE, I MEAN)?

He gave me the same HOPE and said the SAME about my H's Affair and you see how my life is now...

DO EXACTLY AS HE SAYS!!!

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

BACK LATER......

I am so glad you at least feel better about tomorrow. I also feel better about tomorrow. I don't have to go to court, my H agreed to the motion so for now I'm getting what I want. I will update soon on my thread. Haven't had much time my dad has been very sick after his surgery last Thursday and haven't been able to post.

newly,

I hope your dad soes better soon.... I am glad you don't have ot go to court tomorrow. Maybe this will give you some time...


Mimi,

I am going to follow this advice from Steve for sure... I just pray it slows things down some....


Hurting

Just think how the OW will LB and she can't do a thing about it!!!

Deep down I think your WH will be glad that you saved him from this and he does not have to take responsibility...

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

All I caN SAY IS wow........

just went and talked with my MIL and told her about Steve she was very impressed... she agrees with him all the way..

Anyhow she was telling me that WH called my SIL yesterday while she was working. WH said to my SIL, I know a lot of people think what I am doing is wrong but all of my friends (new friends I guess) tell me that they have never seen me happier. This is the happiest I have been in years. She said he kept going and she told him whatever she didn't want ot hear it and hung up on him.... He never called her back...

Anyhow MIL says I think he is having second thoughts now and is trying to justify it to someone and get them to agree with him...

Oh yeah Steve asked me about people enabling the affair. I told him none of our friends or families stand behind him at all. All he has is OW and her friends. He said good. I told him how my in-laws have stood behind me and how he has treated them, he was not surprised at all. He says its the norm... He was not surprised WH blew everyone off for christmas except for the kids....

Hurting, I am glad you had a chance to talk to Steve. He's a great strategizer. The phone thing isn't strange at all. My inlaws thinks it's a sham because, as they say, "How can somebody advise you when they can't look into your eyes?" I think SH does a great job.

Best of luck tomorrow. Wear your armour and a BIG smile.

GG,

Thanks , I will do just that....

Steve says try not to be to emotional be very matter of fact and keep saying I need to time to think all of this over. And when they make an offer just say thats very interesting but I need to think about it. This is somethat tha tis going to affect my whole life and I am not willing to agree to anything without some thought...

I hope this stratagy works... But one thing for sure I do need to time to think about whatever is offered to make sure its right for me and not have to maybe look back later and say I wish I had thought it out more.....

Hurting -

Hi! Glad the call went well. He gave you some good advice & there's nothing like hope to make you feel better!!

Will be thinking about you!

Kim

Thanks Kim...

One thing I did ask Steve about was giving WH the planb letter again. He advised against it for now since this legal stuff is going on. He said that would just stir things up again.

He did say WH knows what you want and how you feel. I told him that some people say that since WH knows this that he will continue to play this out because he knows I will take him back.

He said don't worry about what other people think, he says that shows my commitmnet and devotion to my husband and there is nothing wrong with WH knowing this. He says that does not mean be a doormat to him but showing him the love and commitment is what will allow WH to know he has choices. He said I should be proud of this because it
shows my commitment to marriage.

He did say once the affair is over(in my mind when/if) his withdrawl will probably not be pretty and very intense so be prepared for it. Steve is sure this affair will end in time... I hope he is right .....

He asked me if WH has read any of the books or anything I told him no, WH is not a reader and anyway he won't read any of the stuff I printed out either. I did say he reads my letters and keeps them. He said that was good. If/when we can work this out then I can get WH involved in reading stuff...

Dang I took notes but things keep coming to me a little at a time... My recorder didn't work right , that sucks ....


Hurting

Be strong, be strong, be strong, be strong!

I have hope for you and faith in you!

I'll throw in an extra prayer for you tonight.

BKarl,

I will do my best to go in there tomorrow and be strong and stand up for myself.

This is all just moving so fast and I have got to slow it down some. It may not change the outcome but it will sure give me time to adjust somewhat....

Like everyone keeps telling me Time is on my side.....