Please share what you are reading. I have given you my list of recommended books, please go back through your post and find them.

L.

Well here is an update!!!

As many of you know I was served with divorse papers... I replied to this and didn't agree to the terms.

I also filed for custody of my child....

So far there has been no indication from my other half that she was served, but I do know for a fact that she was.

I hate this so much... I want her to wake up from this and get counseling, but I guess I just need to stay the course and focus on the most important thing in my life = my child!!! I know I can live without my partner, cause someone who lies like this person has - isn't really my friend at all. But it still hurts...

Another update...

WW keeping child from me
Mad over getting served with response to D
Reduced to SUP Visits

DRAMA DRAMA DRAMA

WW seems to have to control everything... when she doesnt get it her way, she acts out.

Cant see my kid now
its killing me

Not sure what I can do about this... even council gave me no indication

I want to see my child and did nothing to deserve supervised visits, i know how to care for my child.
Seems like vindictiveness to me...

Any thoughts?

What are you doing??? Do you have an attorney? Why can you not see your children???

If you don't have an attorney, you have to get one ASAP! Don't let her push you around like this. Go for temporary custody of the children, file a restraining order against OM from being around the children, document everything she does and says.

I have an attorney and have had one for about a month now.

We filed for Emergency Temp Custody...just have to wait another 13 days for it to be heard... thats what is killing me.
Holding my child hostage and i can't do anything about it until the date.
She did this because she got served with the Emergency Temp Cust Petition... now a date is set but she changed the rules, I guess its her only leverage against me???

I know this is hard but she is playing into your hands. She is acting a selfish, bitter and entitled fool. This hostage taking of the children will not play well with the Judge. Let her keep hanging herself. If you can find out that she has had the children around the OM at any time or better yet slept in the same home, hotel, etc with the children present this will not sit well either. What do you know about OM? Is there any dirt on him? Can you get a background check? This can hurt her as well.

What is her support network vs. yours? Family, friends, etc? How's your employment and income and ability to provide vs. her, your flexibility at work vs. hers? Document in photos time spent with the children. Know their doctor's name, teacher's name, take them to church and sunday school....Is you wife on any depression medication? Has she ever been a heavy drinker or a recreational drug user? How's her temperament under pressure?

Well she took my daughter and is living in the OM moms house... he is living there too. She denies the relationship...but its obvious since she moved out so quick, and the fact that when she first said she was leaving me - he was said to be in the picture pretty much. She denied it, once the papers were filed.

Yea my child tells me how he bought her this, and gave her that. And thats pretty bad upon itself...

We have his history and believe me, its not pretty. Hibitual criminal... felon...severe bi-polar. He has battery against my wife when they were married along mith many unreported abuse alegations that were mentioned in statements from other reports.

She makes minimum wage pretty much... i make between 30-50K a year.
She has drugs in her system from when she was with him like 6 1/2 - 7 yrs ago. I mean like crank and coke, she says he forced it on her some of the times... i no longer believe that. I no longer believe a word that comes out of her mouth.

The moment she held my daughter ransom, the reconciliation was over... you dont play game with family. She hasnt had custody of her own two kids from that marriage in the last 6 1/2 yrs. The mother in law (OM), has them since both parents were unstable and irresponsible.

You are right, it doesn't look good... and all this can be is vindictiveness. Or maybe she is scared I won't bring her back... I would never do that, I don't make the laws. I know the environment there is not safe, but right now I have to put my faith in god and my attorney.

7 people in a 3 bedroom house (that isnt that big anyways). I have a 3 bedroom house, with my daughter having her own room (unlike where she is now on the floor on pallet). My daughter pretty much had her own room since she was about a year old, maybe sooner... we liked having her close to us when she was a baby.

Missing my daughter...

I hope that you all filing for sole custody? Your daughter deserves as much. Based on what you described her I would also go for supervised visitation for your WW with no overnights at OM's home. Make sure your attorney has all of the information. Remember this is YOUR case not his.

You have to forget her for now and protect you and your daughter. I know of which I speak because I had to do the same about three weeks ago and received sole custody of our 18 month old son. I wished she would have "gotten" it but I could wait no longer and I am not sure she will ever "get it". I hope so for the children. Do what you have to do for now and let the future unravel as God sees fit.

I definately appreciate the words of encouragement.

I am not sure she will ever "get it" either... But she is playing for the wrong team honestly. She is putting our kid at risk, and acting like she isn't doing anything wrong. To bring another child into a past abusive relationship is suicide in my opinion.

Trust that I asked for Primary with her only recieving Supervised if she is in that home, or around OM. He is to be nowhere near my daughter per those papers, I just have to have faith that the courts will put her where she belongs... in her own home with her own room where she is stable.

You are right, I can't wait any longer and I realize that. thats why I had to do what I did. Thats why I am suffering now... but its a short term suffering, not a long term one.

How long did it take you to get custody? We have a hearing in about 2 weeks... thats all they could give us even in an emergency.

You and your attorney go to this temporary hearing to WIN! Seeing your history and case I think if you can win sole custody and only allow WW supervised visitation at the temporary hearing (Also go for child support and don't feel the least bit bad about it, she wouldn't) it will be almost impossible for WW to win in open court and the full hearing should she pursue it.

You could win this thing right here I believe. I will be praying that things go well. Don't do anything stupid in the next two weeks to give her any ammunition.

Check this out, she is denying me any visitation unless supervised by her and the mother of the OM.
I didn't accpet that, for that would put me around her and her with the chance to accuse me of something and get me in trouble... no ammunition.

So I basically may be without my kid for like 16 days total... its horrible!!!

I think you are right, I don't expect to lose.

Hang in there brother. It's not important to win every battle. I want you to win the WAR. The end result is all that counts..... My EX WW told me three times "There ain't not judge in this (county, state, country) going to take my kids away from me for what I've done....Well guess what, yes they did!!!

Let her go and take care of you and your children. Remember, document, document, document everything like its a second job. When you show up with quotes, dates, happenings, photos, recordings, etc and she can't even remember where she slept the night before you will be the credible one.

God bless,

I already have a good bit.

She for one isn't allowing me anything but supervised visits...and she is the one supervising, thats not gonna work... thats just baiting me. I won't allow myself to be around her in that setting.

I miss my daughter extremely, and I have cried many tears over this ... its starting to really hit home now.

Her history of non-stability/ abuse/ and pretty much neglect of the other children... should alone show my case, but to have a hibitual criminal in the fold who was previosuly abusive to her, makes it even deeper. Now she stacks the deck by denying me visitation rights??? Hmm, thats sure not gonna look good for her with the judge surely. How can she make rules and deny me my rights without a court order? Simple, she can't... and thats not going to make any judge favor her in my opinion.

Thanks, and any advice you give me will be used, I promise you that...

Now check this out!

Now I have my daughter calling me telling me goodnight, and she tells me that she doesn't live here anymore... and that she lives there now.
What kind of person fills a childs head with that?

The kind that if you do what you need to do and do it well will be having every other weekend visitation with your daughter in the near future.

They can be so mean and ugly. I had a good one with EX WW last night over her alienating my step daughter (daugter to me since 1 yo) and me not seeing her as punishment for protecting our son against her and her lunatic affair partner. When I was done I realized that I could have been more productive by going out back and hitting my head against the wall. There is no reasoning with them when they are like this and somehow even though they are the ones that have destroyed everyone's lives including their own (just don't know it yet) you are somehow the place to vent the anger, guilt, shame, resentment, etc. Don't try and get it, you never will.

The only thing they understand is a court order and even though you may have to file contempt charges in the future to have them get that. Stay strong and protect your daughter. Document last night's conversation as alienation.

Every other weekend is the guidelines set in these matters and I am not even getting that. She did this because I filed for temp custody based on her own actions...

Alienation is correct, she is holding me to Supervised visits (not happening, thats a bait), and the fact that my daughter told me all that on the phone...thats even more alienation. How can she even look in the mirror and say or even think that she is a good parent??? She isn't showing herself to be fit at all... How can holding our daughter from her daddy (who she adores) be a good decision of parenting. It just goes to show how vindictive she truly is...

I have a feeling that she is pregnant!!!

My friend... I pray for you.

Repeat after me:

Lord, Jesus,
You are the light of the world.
Fill my mind with your peace,
and my heart with your love.

I say it at least 25 times a day... no exageration.

Haven't seen my daughter in a week, missing her like crazy...

I know in my heart that I will have my daughter abck where she is safe and stable soon. I thank the few of you that have given me advice (you know who you are).. all your prayers and words of encouragement help me, even if I seem non-responsive to it. I do appreciate it more than you will ever know.

Life is like a circle, I truly believe that. So I will keep being strong and fight back, as soon it will all come back to me.