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Marriage Builders Forums Infidelity Pregnancy/Child Vasectomy and kids

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Vasectomy and kids #1853367 03/30/07 01:25 PM
Joined: Mar 2007 Posts: 1 P pantera OP Junior Member
OP pantera Junior Member P Joined: Mar 2007 Posts: 1	Hello I'm a newbie here. My husband and I got married 4 months ago. Before we got married we talked about having kids. He didn't want to, but it's very important to me to have a child. So we agreed that we would try, even though he has had a vasectomy in the past. I have 2 questions: 1st - he keeps avoiding the subject and every time anyone make a comment about kids he says kind of kidding ''we'll just get a dog instead''. I plan on waiting to ask him to start trying to have kids after we're married for a year. Is it too soon? 2nd - what are our options, I mean, he has had a vasectomy, I know it can be reversed, but besides that - adoption is not an option unless we try everything and it fails. Any advice is appreciated.

Re: Vasectomy and kids pantera #1853368 03/30/07 02:53 PM
Joined: Oct 2000 Posts: 35,996 Shrek's Swamp P Pepperband Member
Pepperband Member P Joined: Oct 2000 Posts: 35,996 Shrek's Swamp	It appears he is less than thrilled about having children. I doubt he will have his vasectomy reversal. You probably made a mistake marrying a man after his having a vasectomy, and a man who does not particularly want kids ~~~> meanwhile, you want kids very much. If no vasectomy reversal within 6 months, do a marriage reversal Pep LINK ~~> Carrot/Stick of Plan A LINK ~~> Buyers/Renters/Freeloaders

Re: Vasectomy and kids Pepperband #1853369 03/30/07 03:57 PM
Joined: Dec 1999 Posts: 219 Milky Way Galaxy R rs0522 Member
rs0522 Member R Joined: Dec 1999 Posts: 219 Milky Way Galaxy	The odds of a successful reversal of a vasectomy are not good - something like 20%. No offense, but since your husband stated rather clearly that he didn't want children, and had a vasectomy, what exactly did you think he meant by "trying" to have children? Even adoption does not strike me as a really good option. Your husband doesn't want children, and also doesn't want to get into an argument with you. This is unfortunate, but I think you might want to consider what your future will be like without children. Or, possibly, without your husband. Regards, rs0522

Re: Vasectomy and kids pantera #1853370 04/09/07 08:25 PM
Joined: Apr 2007 Posts: 1 T Tbar Junior Member
Tbar Junior Member T Joined: Apr 2007 Posts: 1	Hi Pantera, I know what you are going through. My DH also had a vasectomy when we married, but did get it reversed. Unfortunately it failed and now we are at the point of IVF or donor sperm. He has 2 kids from a previous marriage, but I don't have any. We are at the point of me wanting a child desperatly, and he could go without. It's extremely hurtful and emotional!!!

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