This is BestAdvisor's writing. She made the same mistake when she was posting as herself... "samething" vs. "same thing".

BA, you're pathetic.

SB!...I will suggest thqat you either come clean as to who you are or get lost.
Justuss...please block these people by their IPN so that we don't have to continue enduring the senseless crap. Or better yet, get me their IPN and I will track them down and call them at their home.
I am getting very tired of these games that people are playing here.

Big hullabaloo because someone has accused ML of being someone she is not.

But feel free to accuse anyone you like of being a porn site owner and it is MB ACCEPTED PRACTISE.

fakingeveryday
#3163305

Then proceed to post it anyway as FACT


How quickly people forget around here where people come from, you just need to post enough times to get a good post count and your history is history. No questions asked!!

Actually, the "hulabaloo" was not about someone accusing ML of being someone she is not.

To level set, the issue was that someone [BestAdvisor1] used someone else's screen name in attempt to impersonate them, namely Schoolbus.

So stop complaining and get posting.

Why not start with your own story. Then branch out and help others.

People here defend their friends. You aren't a friend. We don't even KNOW you. But that's easily solved. If you want respect...POST. Do it good enough (not just enough) and respect will likley come your way.

Mr. Wondering

LL...I refer you to one of Resilient's posts on this very thread (quoted above)-What she says is VERY TRUE...Further, ML has been quite forthcoming in sharing her personal life experiences regarding infidelity AND helping others here...Her track record speaks for itself...As her friend I would vouch for her any day of the week...Many folks here feel the same way...

Stop complaining and get onboard with helping others and just MAYBE you'll make a few friends...sheesh...

Mrs. W

Ah MR W
there u are.

was wndering about your sig. would you care to share the facts on how you came to this conclusion ... just interested

Darn...you found me. lol

Anyway...only YOU know the facts and I doubt very much, no matter how good for you it would be, that you will share them here on this forum.

The circumstantial evidence upon which I speculate that you are wayward wife is the following:

1. You've lurked here on an infidelity website for 3 or 4 years even though you don't wholeheartedly agree with the principles you stick around.

2. You don't share or reveal anything about yourself which to me indicates you are hiding behind your anonymity.

3. In the now deleted thread by LTCosmo you stated you disagreed with exposure, snooping and exposing to children. This is very foggy thinking...especially for somebody that has been around long enough to see it work to save marriages. I speculate that such a poster must have a personal vested interest in keeping secrets to MAINTAIN a fear of exposure, snooping and letting kids know the truth of their lives for such poster to maintain such disagreement.

4. Your BIL cheated on your sister and he married the OW (which you disclosed almost as a "in your face" to MB) and yet you still think he's a great guy worthy of your love and admiration. Again...someone reading here for 3-4 years and seeing the pain and destruction infidelity reeks on peoples lives this just doesn't ring true that you have NO PERSONAL INTEREST in infidelity. Consider someone like JustLearning...I can bet if his BIL cheated on his sister he would NOT take as kindly to him thereafter (neither would most EVERYONE here).

5. You have consistently defended and come to the aid of waywards getting 2x4'ed here on the boards. Birds of a feather flock together.

6. You proclaim yourself the protector of the abused yet fail to protect your sister, fail to keep from abusing MEDC with the same vigor you criticize in others, and jump to conclusions yourself about others. You are just as mean (human) as anybody here. The false pride and insecurity is transparent.

7. Ooops, forgot one. You stated you'd be pretty much OK if your husband cheated on you. He travels a lot for business yet you blindly trust him, won't snoop on him ever and stated something like "if he'd cheated we'd either work it or not...no big deal". Wow, was all I thought, but then why would you care...it would even the playing field since you've already cheated on him (conjecture).


Unfortunately, your foggy posts are now gone so I can't copy and paste them here. I stated clearly this is my opinion. I am 95% sure I am right about you and I sincerely apologize if I am wrong (a conditional apology is OK in this situation becuase I'll never truly know if I am wrong). I strongly suspect that a few years ago or maybe even 20 years ago...YOU stepped out on your husband. Your stated unilateral use of MB principles in your marriage are having little success building intimacy because the intimacy is impeded by the lack of radical honesty. You continue trying by reason of guilt or shame to apply infidelity recovery principle to your marriage but still feel you can pick or choose the principles and get results. This "pick and choose" philosophy is a typical wayward response to MB....hence my conjecture.

Soooooo...fess up. Calling someone a wayward on an infidelity website is not wrong. It's the subject matter at hand. Call me one if you like.

Mr. Wondering

What is it with this forum
I just wrote a lengthy response and then got invalid and lost the lot !!!

Just click your pen for another 25 mins, I will respond!

LadyL, you can always hit the back button, "copy" what you typed in the little form. Go back to the index, find the topic, and then "paste" what you've written. Evidently your form expired because you took too long to type it out.

So, in other words, nothing's wrong with this forum. It was the user.

Thank You. yes I figured this out. copy copy copy

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

o..k MrW

Might have been a good thing my last post disappeared, I probbaly waffled too much, so to the point.

I came to MB from the midlife forum, when H and I were having major issues unrelated to infidelity. I would say midlife issues. I just found this forum more to my liking because the basis is more ongoing and constant then other forums where people come and go daily and advice is not always thought out or in good judgement. There are not many forums to my knowledge that have people in longer term marriages posting advice relevant to this situstion which I find here.

That period of our life was extremely stressful and taught me many things. Basically all my thinking stems from the simple fact that you cannot control another person's thinking or actions, and nor should you want to.

If my H decided to leave for greener pastures, he has that choice, I am not his keeper. There were times there when I would gladly packed his suitcase for him <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

Marriage is an agreement between two people, ours could have ended at any time during that period and very nearly did on many occassions. But we both chose to stay and work it out as best we could and have come through to the other side.

Everything I think is based on this and trust. I trust that if he is committed, he will do what is right and good for us both. I don't need to check/snoop to make sure if does. I know he will as he knows I will, without givng it another thought. This has been proven time and time again. (added)
I would consider it dis-respectful to even consider.


Sooooooooo, that makes me WW!
I don't reveal much about myself to anyone especially on the net, apart from the obvious reason, I have seen people here use personal information against some time and time again. Must admit, this has a reversee side where it can be used for good to track people down who abuse others and think they can get away with it! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />



I'm still not sure it does save marriages. Where is the surveys that prove it?
Its all speculation. Most people who post here disappear never to be seen again, then there are others who are 'recovered' still having issues. People will sometimes see what they want to see, it's human nature.



He is a great guy and I do care about him. As I've said he was a part of my life for 25 years. I chose to judge him on the person he has proven to be over that period rather than by a mistake he made in an unhappy marriage. If you ask my S, I'm sure she would freely admit he is a kind and decent person who for many years was very honourable.

Might be just my family but we have many examples of people now divorced who are still included on family occassions. I don't get, what you don't get about this.



Could it be that these are the people who get bashed the most here? WW's are your words... are they? I have personally not checked or kept track of who I defend, so maybe you are right.


Whoa...


Fail to protect my S from what? I was my S main supporter, still am and always will be. But I will not bash someone else to be of support to her, especially someone who has treated me with decency and respect.



Double whoa!!!
Am i reading this right!?!?!? Abusing MEDC!?!?!?
Holey sh*te.
If that is how you see it, let me cut and post some dialoge from the said thread in order and tell me you still think that !!!!! Wasn't long ago you were bashing Medc daily as was just about every person on this site ...and for good reason!!!!!!


as above


Apology accepted. You are very wrong, and it can be proven 100% but anyway .. whatever ... I know when I look in the mirror, I am the person I say I am, so what you think means naught to me.


Another reason I don't post much, it drives me crazy. I edit and re-edit and drive myself insane. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

LL...you ran your mouth about why you thought I wasn't a cop any longer. I smacked you back...you didn't like it. Boo, friggin hoo.

As far as tracking people down...LL, you don't have to look hard to find me. I'm not hiding from anyone.


Right here and now, I give MB the authority to give you access to my contact information. I would love to watch you make a fool of yourself thinking you could do something about my smackdown of you.

You crack me up.

LL,

Thanks for your info. U R right about not wanting to post personal stuff on the net...... however, it is hard, very hard to lend support w/o some info.

Maybe now we can all move forward instead of wondering if you are a WW or whatever.... from what I read you are not a BS or WS, right?

If so, what is your reason for posting on GQII?

L.

Actually orchid
I don't look what forum I post on, I go 'last 24hrs' and read topic if I'm interested.
I've said before, I close more threads than I read.

MEDC, just so you know, LadyLayla has a long history of dishing it out and then crying boo-hoo when she gets her [censored] handed back to her. That is her MO. She has been edited numerous times for personal attacks on me, yet she has the GALL to whine about being attacked. She whines about the "hostility" on this board, but is always hostile herself. Be assured you hit the nail on the head when you said she just doesn't like getting smacked back. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

I have grown to just lump her in the same category as other board trolls and menaces such as ************* etal and treat [or IGNORE] her accordingly.. She is a nothing but a board troublemaker that takes valuable focus away from people who deserve our attention.

[quote
MEDC, just so you know, LadyLayla has a long history of dishing it out and then . [/quote]
Get your facts straight before you flap.

IN this instance you have no idea what you are talking about!!!!!

Oh, my facts are just fine. Weren't you on here sniveling a while back that I had "run you off?" How many years have you been whining about how mean old MelodyLane "ran me off?" For someone who was "run off" you sure do come back a lot. You don't appear to be too "run off." <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> Or was that just a ploy to pimp some sympathy because you can't get away with handing out your nastiness unchallenged? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

LL, some day you will catch on that if you can't take it, then don't dish it out. Real dang simple.


The queen of hostility wrote:#3240852 - 05/16/07 07:24 AM link here

sheeesh, but that is an amazing quote considering that your posts are as hostile and nasty as they can be. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />


Edited for name calling me here: http://www.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/sho...rue#Post3091488


Apparently was intently interested in MY STORY and was calling for links to MY STORY on another board. It seems she has some agenda focused on me and has for some time: http://www.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/sho...rue#Post3077820

But that above post doesn't answer my question. Can you?

L.

Mel, I have no intention of getting into "taking sides" on this current spat between Members. But, (you knew there was "but" in there, right?) this "getting smacked back" is the problem, isn't it?

There ARE folks on the system who feel it is their right to "smack anyone" they feel like smacking, justifying and rationalizing that behavior however they find "good enough" in their own minds. What "sets off" that "smacking?"

The same as it does, from time to time, for me. Someone got "personally offended" about something and CHOSE to lash out AT someone rather than to discuss the ideas.

That this "behavior" has occurred, sometimes repeatedly, is beyond question to anyone who has taken the time to read a lot of the threads.

No one can change someone else's behavior. They have to choose to make changes themselves. And the "attacks" really don't seem to be much of a "Plan A" type behavior that might give someone else pause to think that they might want to change their own way of communicating, do they? (for either party to the spat).

I've been involved in some "knock down, drag out" tiffs on MB over the years and in each and every case it began with a difference of opinion and escalated as soon as the "arguments" turned into personal attacks and/or defending one's "right to respond in a similar way."

The question that most comes to mind about all of this is, "what is the definition of insanity?"

Over and over and over again this is the question. Mimi appears to be the latest who has just had enough and if Mimi has reached that point, perhaps that MIGHT be an indication that everyone might want to consider a "check up from the neck up" (as a certain sales guru I like puts it) and an "attitude adjustment" tune up.

Discussion gives way to argument. Toleration of divergent opinions gives way to intolerance. Closely held beliefs become a rationalization for engaging in the very type of posting that would be offensive if it were directed AT themselves. "Knight in shining armor" syndrome brings out the warhorses. "Florence Nightengale" syndrome "excuses" poor action on the part of the member and how they respond because of the rationalization that they are "defending the weaker."

This, imho, is a forum and a site dedicated to the DISCUSSION of ideas and fostering change THROUGH the application of ideas. It is an attempt to influence the hearts and minds of others by an information exchange and a discussion of the "WHY's" of infomation.

It is NOT a "my way or the highway" site, though it has often been presented that way over the years.

"Smack back?" Perhaps. But then "we are all just human," right?

God bless.

FH...Since you decided to stick your nose in this...you have no clue as to what happened.
What I got offended at was LL saying I was no longer a cop because of abuse of power. I was thrown off the force according to her.
She got smacked back for that. Perhaps you should go crawl back in your little..."I'm leaving MB AGAIN...hole unless you want to get the facts straight.
You end your posts with God Bless which is funny to me FH since you KNOW you are coming here and flat out lying.