As a distraction and as emotional support he was great, but when it came down to it he was kind of useless. He cried, lol and was so excited that he got to go with her down to the nursery (I can't remember if he carried her or not). It was very sweet. I just can't imagine him not being that way with his son. He is the last male in his family and they have been bugging us about having a boy for years. Finally they get one and now he does this....it's crazy.

I'm certain he will be back.

Are you close to anyone in his family? Maybe you could ask one of them to come with you to the hospital.

I think the only problem your hubby has is that he is very young.

Yeah, I will agree with the very young part. I might be able to get his parents to come to the hospital with me, I don't know.

*sigh* I just had an accident though. I was pulling out of my driveway and hit another car. Luckily no one was hurt and the damage wasn't too bad. Blah, just my luck

Be careful driving. We have had quite a few BS's here having accidents. All of this affair stuff is so mind-moggling that I think sometimes they are very distracted.

Peronally, I think I would talk to his family. This coming child is the male heir. Let them know that you love your husband, but need some support. Ask if anyone can come to the hospital with you.

Actually, I'll be amazed if he doesn't show up.

Hope you feel like you can hang in there a couple more weeks.

How are the rest of the kiddos doing?

DD5 keeps asking why daddy and I can't live together. I've told her it's because daddy thinks it's better this way and doesn't want to. I don't know what else to say to her. He should be answering these questions. DD12 has way more attitude than she should and is lashing out at all of us except WH. She says that he would only get mad and doesn't care anyway, though I've assured her that that's not true. I've set up an appointment for her with a counselor. DD10 seems to be doing okay. I love her dearly and I've always called her my little blonde. LOL. I think she is just oblivious enough to get through it. She said that whenever she starts to think about dad not being here she just changes what she is thinking about.

Other than that, they are okay. They don't want to move, except DD10 is kind of excited, but I still think that is the best move for all of us. It might make WH see what he is missing out on, I don't know.

"She said that whenever she starts to think about dad not being here she just changes what she is thinking about."

Sounds like a healthy way to think. A lot of adults haven't figured that out.

And you might as well tell DD5 that daddy has a girlfriend, and married folks don't do that.

I did tell her that Daddy had met another woman that he liked more than mommy and that's the reason he moved to grandma and grandpa's. She hasn't mentioned anything about that since, just asking why we can't live together. Should I just tell her the same thing again?

Tell her the truth - that her father has a girlfriend, and is mixed up. Let her know that you have a plan to work all of this out.

I have the plans, but I don't know if it will work out the way that we (the girls and myself) want it to. So, I'm afraid to tell her that, I'm afraid that it will be a lie.

Blah, just saw a recent picture of the OW and I'm just wondering WTF my stupid WH is thinking? She is NOT cute in these pictures at all. I wonder if it makes her feel good to know she took a guy away from someone who is clearly her superior in looks and good sense (lol not that I'm gorgeous or anything, but OMG she is not attractive!).

Ayane,
these a free ebook called '31 reasons to end your affair" One of the 31 reasons is that the WS affairs down. As in looks, abilities, intellegence, the works.
'my' OW is 36, looks 46, is crass, uncouth, stupid, has a mental disorder that she willl not take her meds for, drinks heavily, has lost custody of her 4 children under 10, and doesnt understand the need for faithfulness.... not even to my WH.
Still i should grateful she made that very apparent, its the reason he is coming home.
I on the other hand am reasonably good looking when I am not on the BS diet, run my own business, am well educated, am 34, has custody of both my girls (neither father would or could take them off me) know what fork to use, and have been 100% faithful to my WH.
So trust me, her 'blah' works in your favour

I don't know if it does or not. Apparently she is the type of girl who is very easily manipulated and I'm not. I don't know so much if it's how she looks that my WH likes or the fact that she will do whatever and believe whatever he says. So, yeah, she isn't as attractive as I am, but he still feels there is a "connection" (ugh) and that she is so sweet while I am the antichrist. *sigh*

LOL, I know how you feel, Ayane. While I'm about average, my WW's OM looks like some homeless bum (even according to my DD, who's met him), is a convicted felon out on parole for drug dealing, has Child Support Enforcement after him now that he's out of prison for the three women he knocked up (only one of whom was his wife), he's not even sure if he's legally divorced from his wife, his one legitimate kid hates him, and he doesn't know the other two, is probably an alcoholic, and rents in a trailer park.

In contrast, I have a Bachelor's, Master's and Professional degree, I helped raise, and eventually adopted her two kids from her prior marriage. I make about 6 times what he does, and we've always lived in a nice home.

But, I guess it proves once again that it's the bad boys that get laid.

I just don't get it, but then I suppose I'm not ever going to, so I'm not even going to try. The wayward mind is a thing on it's own and it's CRAZY!!

I woke up with a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach and I continue to have it. A feeling in my bones that something bad is going to happen. I hope it's not right. I've been praying about my decisions and I feel that I'm on the course that God wants me to be on, so that is nice. Then, my mind analytical mind starts working and I second guess myself. I wonder if it's just my subconcious telling me what I want to hear (haha wonder if that's what happens to a wayward??? ). I wish I could turn a switch off in my brain and be totally oblivious sometimes.

Ayane - Actually you ARE gorgeous. Be glad hubby picked a dog. Mine picked an OW who was 20 years younger than I and quite pretty. That SUCKED because it made me feel so hopeless. But their affair ended too. Just like they all do.

I think your hubby is using the affair as more of a way to escape his responsibilities. But I'm sure that the OW isn't going to stay sweet for long. The reality of living together will finally cause some problems. Then he will figure out that life has problems no matter who you live with.

When he finally has to start paying some child support, that will give him an even bigger dose of reality. Let's just hope the OW doesn't turn up pregnant.

Sorry you are feeling like something bad is going to happen. Try to stay calm. This should be a happy period in your life. It is not fair to you or your children. But that is the way life works.

That's right. What's that saying - When life gives you lemons, make lemonade...? LOL, I never thought I had the sugary sweetness to do that, but I'll sure try .

Thanks for the compliment believer...I'm slowly learning to think that about myself, it's just a difficult process when my self esteem has been low for years. I'm sorry that your xWH picked someone like that, I know that had to be hard for you. I guess somewhere I had it in my mind that if your going to destroy our whole family, she had better be something that I consider spectacular. LOL, I tend to forget sometimes, that my opinion doesn't matter. But, I know that if things don't work out with my WH and I start dating again, I want someone who is going to wow him. That could be my childishness or selfishness, I don't know. But, I certainly wouldn't want to be with someone that my ex says, WTH is she thinking about? Haha, I guess I thought he would feel the same way.

Yes, my WH is very young and immature and I didn't realize how much until all of this. I don't think he understands the full ramification and consequences of his actions. He hasn't thought anything out. After the baby is born, he will be paying child support that is nearly half his income!! When I move he will get this apartment and that will take nearly all of the rest of his income. He will have none left for utilities, etc. I don't know what he is going to do, but it's not my problem anymore.

I spoke with my best friend last night about moving and she was asking what would I do if the move opened his eyes and he changed and wanted to work things out. She said moving would be bad because I would just have to move right back. I stopped her immediately and said NO, once I go, I go. If he comes to his senses, he has to do the work, make the move, prove that he has changed, and wants to be a good husband and father. I won't move back. I want to leave this place and get back to somewhere that holds sweet memories for me....of our relationship and just my life in general. Everything hurtful that has happened in our relationship has happened in this apartment and in this town. I'm done here. It feels like time to move on.

I forget, why did you move in the first place?

Because his parents live here and we just wanted to move somewhere else for awhile.

Blah, WH sent a message through the kids that he "never intended to hurt me ever". Haha what a joke. I had no comment. If he never intended to hurt me he would be home right now going through this baby stuff with me instead of out f'ing around with stupid people. *sigh* Sorry, I'm a little po'ed

Ugh, saw a recent picture of Dakota Fanning and realized that the OW looks like an older, less attractive Ms. Fanning. It's really weird.

Don't reply. You are exactly right - he could end all of this today if he so chose.

I need to take up meditation again, maybe some buddhist chants

The concept of Be Still appeals for me, it's just a difficult thing. During the day things usually aren't so bad, but at night, when the kids are asleep, it's hard. I usually have to take something to help me sleep and I still sleep on the couch.

I don't intend to reply to him at all unless he says he wants to end this now and get things worked out.