WH called wanting to talk to me about the dog. He is going to lodge her somewhere else until the kids and I move and he moves back into the apartment and can keep her. I didn't talk to him, woohoo!!! I am going to contact his mom and tell her that I will drop the dog off at a certain time and I DO NOT want to see him. Think that will work?

I got the child support papers today, yay! They will begin taking it out of his check at the next payperiod, so that's a good thing. I also asked about taking DD5 out of state if I move and the woman referred me to a free attorney that sees people on Mondays and Weds so I guess that's what I'm doing this evening :-)

That is such good news, Ayane. See, good things are going to start happening to you.

After exposure, reality is the biggest affair killer.

Stick with Plan B. Everything is starting to come together.

The only thing that sucks about my Plan B is that I don't think I did a very good Plan A beforehand, but oh well.

On a good note - I got a call today about a job that I applied for almost a year ago, a human resources assistant for the city. I would love to get that job and it's something that would make me stay here. I was honest and told the woman that I was pregnant so now it's in God's hands on whether I get it or not. I'm keeping my fingers crossed!

*sigh* Really missing the hubby today. I just wish he would come back home. I wish I could tell him that we want him home and he would move all his stuff back, but I know that he won't. It really, really hurts. Most days are okay, but this whole weekend and today I've just been an emotional wreck, missing him and wondering what the hell is wrong with me. Blah, I know that self pity isn't pretty, but I can't seem to help myself at this moment. I would be happy to just have a big hug from him right now. *sigh* I hope these feelings go away soon.

WH is hanging out more and more with the chick that he cheated with before. The one that just a couple months ago he couldn't stand and called a whore. They are probably being physical too and that bothers me. I mean how can he tell me that he doesn't think about me "that way" but he can go and do stuff with a dumpy girl who is less attractive than the OW? It makes me feel like complete sh*t. I just don't get it.

Once he starts paying child support he will start thinking and may change his actions.

Everything is in your favor, so stay strong.

How did you find out what he is doing? You are not supposed to be hearing anything about him.

He told the kids where he took the dog (now she has my husband hanging out with her AND my damn dog) and they told me.

I haven't contacted him though so that is good.

The woman called me back about the job that I wrote about yesterday. They want me to come in and do some testing, yay! This was the job that I really, really wanted and was so disappointed that I didn't get. I would love to have it. So, I'll use the skills that I have (haha typing test tomorrow, I've got smoking fingers on the keyboard!) and the rest is up God and where he wants me to be. I would definitely stay here and not move if I got this position, if I didn't I would definitely go home. I'm not hanging everything on it, it's just that I had made up my mind to go and out of the blue, they call. So.....

Good things are a'coming

Prayers going up for you to get this job. And if this one doesn't work out, put in for some more jobs. Nothing like working to take your mind of problems.

WH called today to try and speak with me. I had DD10 answer the phone and when he persisted, I took it and hung it up. He called my mom and was going on about child support and how me taking DD5 out of state if I move is kidnapping. He said he was the only father figure the girls know and my mom told him that he should have thought of that before he left. He didn't like that and was ready to get off the phone immediately.

I called a lawyer to ask about moving DD5 out of state and I was told that I could move her wherever I wanted to. There was no law stating that I had to have his agreement. So, that is a good thing.

I just don't understand why he was adamant that we move when he first left, telling me and my mom that we should go, but now he doesn't want us to leave. I don't think it's the kids, because if it was, he would be spending a lot more time with them. I don't know if it's just to be a jerk or what. But, I was so very proud of myself for hanging up on him again. LOL, and he told my mom that I needed to grow up and talk to him.

just wanted to comment about the dog



You know, dogs like to sniff each other's butts every now and then. Just because you don't like her, doesn't mean your dog should go without an opportunity to meet another dog.



SB

LOL, SchoolBus. Hang in there Ayane. Stay dark.

He wanted you GONE when he first started the affair. That is so he could conduct it without any problems from you.

Now, you are still the back-up plan, and he wants you near.

I'm not sure I like being a backup plan. Matter of fact, I'm SURE that I don't like it. He's totally gone about it the wrong way if that's what he plans. Who knows.

LMAO SB.....you are so right. If I get this job I can get my butt sniffing dog back from the other one. Ugh.

Thinking of starting my Plan B thread and retire this one. Is that acceptable? I don't want to have a million threads.

Well now I'm not that dark at all. My WH sent a message on myspace from another name. I'm going to post it here because he is just one weird guy.

"alright....let's talk, about this stuff. i am pretty sure i am making the decisions i need to in my life now. i have enjoyed my time minus not being with the girls. and i must honestly say that you leaving with them and our boy is the exact reason i never wanted to initiate this [censored] in the first place. but i can't make you stay. i wish with all my heart that you would stay around for the kids sake because i would very much want to be a part of their daily or weekly lives and not a holiday and phone call dad. i love our kids. i will never stop loving them. so don't think that even if you do leave that i will leave their lives, because i very well may put myself once again to be able to be a part of their daily lives by moving back to (city name) or something of the like with my networking degree just so i could be around them again, and spend more time with my son. spending time with them IS important, and i am remorseful for the situation i put everyone in. but sorry doesn't cut it."


It doesn't seem like a very remorseful message to me. It's funny the way that he thinks because he isn't involved in the kids daily life now and he IS a phone call dad. He doesn't see them on his days off, he is spending time with others. By the time he gets his degree, his son will be walking. That is a long time away and children grow so quickly, especially with the out of sight, out of mind mentality.

I'm not replying back to him.

He does sound a bit remorseful, but remember, he can fix that at any time. Don't respond. Stay dark. Don't give him an Ayane fix. And don't open any more emails.

It sounds to me like he knows he screwed everthing up, but doesn't want to fix it and even if he did it sounds like he doesn't think he could. At least that is my take on him saying "i am remorseful for the situation i put everyone in. but sorry doesn't cut it."

It also sounds like he is trying to manipulate you into not moving by pulling on your heart strings for the kids.

Why do you think he sent you this message?

I have no idea. He has been trying to contact me by phone, but I won't talk to him. He was all up for me moving when we first separated but now he doesn't want me to because of the kids. I don't know what goes on in his brain. He is having fun just running around and doing what he wants to do. I think that he likes having no responsibilities. So, I guess if I had to answer....why do I think he sent this to me I would say:

To let me know that he doesn't want me, he's happy where he is, he doesn't want to fix us, but he does love the kids.

Hey, you changed your name! I would like to change mine also, just in case WH ever decided to come here, he would probably know that I chose this name. Did you just get a new account?

To change your name you just go to "my stuff" then to "my profile" then just type a new name in your display name and click on submit.