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O M G!!!!!!!!!!!!
That is one of the greatest things I have ever heard in my WHOLE life!!!!!
My advice is to absolutely tell your wife. She will once again SEE you standing up for your marriage, for her and, showing MASSIVE amounts of respect for yourself. A very attractive quality I might add.
And if she gets mad(I doubt she will though), that's JUST TOUGH. Consequences.
Good for you RB!! Good for you!
WH2LE
WH2LE
BS(Me)-57
FWH-54
Married-5/26/2001(2nd for me, 1st for him)
DS-30
DD-27
D-Day-05/31/2007
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Yes, [size:23pt]MASSIVE amounts of respect. And that MASSIVE HUGE photo passed all around and hung up in the home. [/size]
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Running, you were MASSIVELY GUTSY! (My word for the day is Massive)
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Excellent, RB. You couldn't have done better if you'd planned it for a month, and plotted every detail, down to each breath. If you'd been a fly on the wall of either of THOSE houses, the next time the loving spouses had a chance to "chat," betcha you'd have had to wash your EARS out with soap!!
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(insert thunderous applause here)  WAY TO GO RBI would tell your wife and and show her the picture. You will handle that appropriatly also, i'm sure. Kudo to U! Stay Strong!
WTF
*** Warning *** Make sure brain is engaged before shifting mouth out of Neutral.
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WH2LE
BS(Me)-57
FWH-54
Married-5/26/2001(2nd for me, 1st for him)
DS-30
DD-27
D-Day-05/31/2007
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Your encounter of the OM is what every BH (and BW) dreams.
Me:52
W: 52
Married: 32 yrs
2 Sons (29 & 23)
1 Dtr (20)
1 GDtr (2.5) precious little girl
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My thoughts exactly!!!!!
WH2LE
WH2LE
BS(Me)-57
FWH-54
Married-5/26/2001(2nd for me, 1st for him)
DS-30
DD-27
D-Day-05/31/2007
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RB, Oh darn another potential friendship lost. You really have to stop making enemies this way. I like it, I guess OM now knows he lost your friendship right?  I love it. As for your W, yes tell her. She will hear about this somehow, someway because of the woman OM was with. Stories like this travel and you don't know who heard you at Starbucks. You don't want her getting blindsided. I realize the irony of that statement, but really protect her by giving her the story. I doubt she will be mad or even really upset, at least with you. She may be more upset with herself given what a jerk this guy is. Open and honest, if you want it from her, you have to give it to her as well. Nice Job. This will go down in the MB books and retold many times. God Bless, JL
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RB: I think your reaction was a good one.. and as a WW myself, and pregnant (haven't posted on this forum but have followed your story), would not be ticked if my BH did the same thing with OM and do think you should tell her.. However, I disagree with the following and some other statements.. I would blow up a HUGE 3 foot by 2.5 foot poster size picture of this idiot and his new HO. Then hang it in your kitchen. Or somewhere where your wife sees it all day. Why throw it in his wife's face? It's not like she doesn't have a daily reminder of her sin growing in her belly, one that, if they chose to keep this baby, won't be a daily reminder anyway. . She knows she was stupid (as was I... )... She knows OM is stupid as well and a complete looser. I just don't see why it has to be thrown in her face the way that others are suggesting... besides, RB doesn't seem like that kind of a man..... doesn't seem like he is spiteful or vindictive.. he seems like he truly loves his wife, is very genuine and is really committed to this marriage. I have a great deal of respect for him.
Last edited by hishandholdsme; 06/25/08 06:32 PM.
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Haha! You think I am serious? You dont know me then. I was adding strong emphasis to the subject. I know he wont do that!
If he had a poster of that OTHER MAN in the bedroom, they would never again be able to make love!
Geeze, I may be difficult but I am not crazy.....
Last edited by Stellakat; 06/25/08 06:34 PM.
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RB...
I do see an "S" on your chest! Had to add my gigantic kudos for you...
and to vote for radical honesty in your marriage. Good incident to highlight choosing to not base your choice to be honest on possible response.
You're already that brave and courageous (LOVED the pix to OMW and her decision to send it to neighbor's H).
LA
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That was definitely one of the best stories I've ever heard, and what I wouldn't give to have been there to see that.
That was just awesome. Yep, my hero too. I'd vote you in for president....lol....
Husband was unfaithful to me before and after our marriage, at least 7 times. I found out 13 yrs into the marriage. Trickle truth for an entire year. Several different d-days, so it was more like a d-year. Difficult recovery.
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Who else but me thinks that RB actually has a big "S" tattooed on his chest?
That.
Was.
AWESOME.
(and I think you did the right thing) ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG....If you have ANY DOUBTS about how you handled that, DON'T. You handled that with as much poise and grace as SUPERMAN would given all the crap that POS has put you through..... ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 5555555555555555555555555 NOT2FUN
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I agree 100%. He handled it very, very well, and he just might have saved another marriage in the process.
One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger
I will not spend my life this way.
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I did decide to tell my wife about this little episode. It really came down to the fact that I want her to be totally honest with me, so it's only right that I am totally honest with her. She actually took it fairly well with some initial shock.
She actually listened very quietly when I told her what happened. She was actually quiet most of the evening. As we were getting ready for bed, she told me that she was glad that I told her about this, but that it really just made her angry with herself that she let herself get into this situation.
Looking back, I'm actually kind of proud of myself for how I handled the situation. My first instinct was to go over and punch him in the mouth. But, I guess all the work I've been doing to learn how to control my temper is beginning to pay off. Either that or I'm just becoming much more devious and calculating in expressing my anger.
BH(me)-44
WW - 43
DD20
DS17
DD13
d-day 4/18/08
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Wow, your encouter with the dirtbag was much more civil than mine was.
Kudos on sending his wifey a pic.
I watch, and am as a sparrow alone upon the house top.
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Wow...I don't post much, but the way you handled that was just CLASSIC. I just had to give you props. I wouldn't be surprised to see that scene in a movie someday...WOW!
I would have love to have seen the look on the woman's face he was with
gonna start calling you superman65..GOOD JOB!
Last edited by shaken; 06/26/08 07:24 AM.
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RB, I see you did decide to tell your W about this, and in retrospect, I suppose others are right about radical honesty. I was simply a little concerned about your W's rather fragile state of emotions right now, while being pregnant with OM's child. Didn't want to see her have toxic thoughts about the innocent child she is carrying. You did well, very well in exposing OM and his new OW. Seems like a healthy dose of justice was dropped in your lap.  Your W is probably going to be very emotional over the next couple of days, and is going to need to see from you, love, understanding, and forgiveness. I know you are up to the task, All Blessings, Jerry
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