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rb,
Thanks for the update (it was me who asked.... ;)). I know what you mean about this place making you angry. Sometimes being here is not healthy for us BS'S in recovery.....
Anyway, glad to hear things are going so well. I'll be praying for you and your family in the upcoming weeks as you prepare for the birth......
not2fun
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You are amazing!
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I think you made a great decision re: child support and OM relinquishing paternal rights. You have created a path of freedom for your lives rather than one that is forever entangled with OM.
Your story is one that is going to go down in the MB hall of fame.
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Thank you for the update. I was wondering how things were going. Sounds like it's going pretty smooth. I pray that when you lay eyes on that baby for the very first time that your heart will melt and he/she will become a further source for healing instead of a reminder of the pain.
As to OM, looks like the karma bus train has finally caught up to him.
Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage ********************* “In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists.” Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story
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Runner,
""She is due in 6 weeks now""
6 WEEKS!!?? NO WAAAAYYYYY!!
Wow, time flies by. Seems like only last month we were all discussing your sitch.
Very good news on the personal progress, business downsizing, and that karma bus flattening the OM.
Carry on.
kirk
CORDUROY PILLOWS ARE MAKING HEADLINES!!
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It's nice to know you're still around, RB. See, not making a decision for a while about what to do with telling the OM DOES pay off sometimes! All you had to do was wait til after he's paying child support already, and BAM. Stick around, please, there are lots of BS's that could use your advice and support.
Last edited by karmasrose; 11/13/08 02:35 PM.
One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger
I will not spend my life this way.
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It’s been a long time since I’ve been around, but I wanted to give an update for everyone that helped me so much in the months after d-day.
My wife had her baby this past Thursday. It was about 3 weeks early, but was a 5 lb 8 oz baby boy that was completely healthy. I have come a long way in accepting this child over the past 6 months, but I was still not able to be in the delivery room. Luckily, she had her best friend there and I just waited in the waiting area. I won’t lie and tell you that it’s been easy to accept him since he came home on Saturday. But, every time I hold him or feed him, I feel myself growing a little more attached to the little guy. I can tell at this point that there will come a day pretty soon where he won’t be her child but our child.
The other good news, is that we had OM served with the relinquishment papers on Friday. I have just gotten a call from my lawyer letting me know that he has since signed them. Apparently, he was eager to get this issue behind him and avoid any chance of being sued for child support. He has given up all of his parental rights, assuring us that he never has to be a part of our lives again.
I can see now how fortunate I was to have a ww that was repentant from very early in this process. Her commitment to recovery gave us over 6 months to work on our marriage and prepare for the birth of this child. I feel good about the progress we’ve made and the decision we made to keep this child. In fact, our marriage is probably better now than it’s ever been. I just wish we had known about the MB concepts years ago.
Thanks again to all of you who helped me sort through all of the raw emotions post d-day.
BH(me)-44 WW - 43 DD20 DS17 DD13 d-day 4/18/08
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Good for you Runnerboy,
You are definitely a hero in my eyes
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Thanks so much for the update, Runnerboy. I was just thinking this weekend, about how it must be time soon for the birth.
You are to be admired for your strength and character through this ordeal. I'm glad that the OM has signed off his rights. My prayer is that as your marriage continues to grow, your love for this little boy will grow as well.
God bless you!
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RB,
You have done well. You really have. I hope that this little fella brings much joy to your heart in the years to come, you have earned that.
I am glad to hear that your marriage is doing well and I hope that you and your W also have many years of joy and contentment.
God Bless,
JL
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Thank goodness the OM signed everything away.
Many blessings to you and your family.
I never had to take the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution?O'hana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten. My Story Recovered!
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God bless you both, and all your children.
tl
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Fantastic news all-around RB......I am in awe at how well you have handled EVERYTHING thus far.....Most of us cannot always say that...Good tidings to all of you....and Happy Holidays...
not2fun
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RB,
You are one amazing, heroic, well-grounded man.
Mark
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You get a big gold star for this. This baby is lucky to have you for a father.
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I can tell at this point that there will come a day pretty soon where he won’t be her child but our child. I suspect that someday, like pops is with his W's OC, this little guy will hold a special place in your heart.
The other good news, is that we had OM served with the relinquishment papers on Friday. I have just gotten a call from my lawyer letting me know that he has since signed them. Apparently, he was eager to get this issue behind him and avoid any chance of being sued for child support. He has given up all of his parental rights, assuring us that he never has to be a part of our lives again. This is wonderful news, to have the threat of OM completely out of your life. Your FWW has made a remarkable turn around as well.
I can see now how fortunate I was to have a ww that was repentant from very early in this process. Her commitment to recovery gave us over 6 months to work on our marriage and prepare for the birth of this child. I feel good about the progress we’ve made and the decision we made to keep this child. In fact, our marriage is probably better now than it’s ever been. I just wish we had known about the MB concepts years ago. She has a pretty amazing husband, too. God bless you all in this new journey and thank you for sharing your victories with us.
Faith
me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49 DS 30 DD 21 DS 15 OCDS 8
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WOW!
God Bless you and your family RB.
Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW) D-Day August 2005 Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23 Empty Nesters. Fully Recovered.
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Just curious, do you plan on telling the child you are not the biological parent?
Plan D June 08 Me FBS 36 W 38 Married 13/1/09 The best is yet to come, with or without your WS
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Just curious, do you plan on telling the child you are not the biological parent? Vladie - with teenaged kids, do you think he could keep it a secret? have you even read his story?
Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW) D-Day August 2005 Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23 Empty Nesters. Fully Recovered.
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