The RO says that I can only contact her via email. I emailed her asking to see my daughter today, and have had no reply. If my daughter is with me, does she have to email me about seeing her, or can she call me and ask that I bring her back home?

Right now you need to be asking these things of a lawyer.

Should you file? Yes. Should you file for divorce? That's up to your state. Some treat custody as one and the same.

Right now you should follow the RO until you have it revoked. If it says you don't see your DD, then don't see the DD.

You want to appear like a man who plays by the rules.

If the RO says nothing about your DD, you could legally take your DD, move to Alaska, and file for divorce there. (I'm exagerating, but you get the idea).

But lawyer up like right now.

A RO will be a stain on your record and you must fight it and you must lawyer up immediately.

You're wanting to fight, but you're not fighting smart. We can give you all the free advice in the world, but a lawyer knows the law of your state and how to shoot these things down.

Read the guide I gave you. It explains the advantages of filing first and I think you should if your goal is to get custody or protect your rights as a father.

But the immediate concer is the RO.

Get it dismissed so you can go back to your home.

What about OM's wife?

What about her accounts such as email? Cell phone records? What spying have you done?

OM's wife believes the OM's lies. I saw a lawyer today, although I am not so sure about him. He doesn't really see me as being able to get back in the home. And he doesn't think it is a good idea to try to file first(he says it doesn't matter who files first) He thinks I should try to settle on a parenting schedule via email with my wife and avoid the court if at all possible. I am being told to try to find a place to live asap, one that my daughter can be at. But I don't want to get myself stuck in a lease since I really should be at my house. Also me filing for divorce is not really an option since Arizona is a no fault divorce state, so they don't care if there was adultery at all. Also the lawyer thinks that it wouldn't make a difference who files first. hmm..... Im confused.

well since adultery is not really important in the states eyes, my spying doesn't really matter much, but I don't have too much to go on. Yes she calls him and emails him, but there isn't anything that incriminating anyway.

Find another lawyer.

Google "father's rights arizona" or whatever city you live in and find an attorney that is going to light a fire under her butt and get you back in your home.

It's YOUR home!

Ill see what I can find.

hey pom can you send that info to shannzambonini@gmail.com I am having problems with the other address. I don't know if you tried sending it yet or not, but I havn't got anything.

I found this site. http://www.arizonafathersrights.com/
seems good.

They recommend defending yourself(using their tools, and with their knowledgable support base) unless you can find the right lawyer. I'm going to look for another lawyer today and also look more into this group.

she still isn't responding or else stalling with questions to my email requests to see my daughter. I am thinking of filing for legal separation to initiate the custody case. i need a good lawyer though first.

Don't get crazy with the emails. You can look crazy if you email her too many times in a day.

One or two requests to talk to your daughter a day is ok.

I would only recommend defending yourself if you're a really smart person and at ease in front of others. I otherwise would not do it. Even if you have those qualities, I'd talk to a lawyer.

Divorce lawyers are a dime a dozen. Use that father's group to see if there are any that anyone recommends.

Im pretty sure that they don't recomend any. They seem to not trust lawyers much. Said if you have one they will help you deal with him.

Family law is one of the only types of law where I really think a father has a shot to go in there and simply say, "I'm a good dad. Can I please get to see them as much as she sees them."

You then show that you're a good dad. Show how you have a good home for them, a steady job with predictable hours, and a safe car to get them around.

Everything else, in total complete honesty, really falls into a consideration for the judge.

But that's the impression from my experience. Our judge didn't seem to care about little stuff that was nitpicky and not important.

He cared about how the kids could be taken care of and see both parents regularly.

So keep yourself straight and honest and things will be ok.

Don't email your ex for anything other than a request to see your daughter once or twice a day or something relating to her care.

Don't use your daughter as an excuse to talk to your ex.

These are learned things. It takes time to get to the point where you understand what needs to be talked about and what really doesn't matter.

In other words you learn to operate without the input or feedback from your wife.

I do believe you should get a lawyer, though.

all of the ones I talked to are really expensive. I wonder if it is really worth it.

I certainly don't want to even try risking talking to my wife. Since I can email her, I try to slip some of my thoughts in a bit here and there, but keep them mostly business. I have had my daughter today, but am bummed that I have to take her back soon with a police standby. This is so frustrating, my daughter wants to stay the night with me and I have to tell her no.

I completely, completely understand. It's horrible. I've been there.

But be cheerful for her and let yourself break down once you're out of sight.

All lawyers are expensive, but you should hire one to defend this RO at a minimum.

Did you read shockbetrayed's thread yet? He put it here for you.

weren't you gonna send me something via email?

I understand the one or two requests, but what if she responds and we need to have a few emails of correspondence? is it fine as long as I keep my requests to a bare minimum?

Saw a lawyer today. He is going to help fight this. My wife has now filed for divorce and is filing for joint custody, but her request is for me to have my daughter every other weekend. Absolutely uncalled for, and I absolutely will not stand for it.
I saw my daughter today, and she was so bummed that she couldn't stay with me. The OOP needs to be stopped or else it looks bad on me in the custody battle.

Every other weekend is unnacceptable and shot down by every single study regarding the subject.

50/50 minimum.

The more brutal you make her realize this is going to be the better.

YOU AREN'T GOING WITHOUT A FIGHT!

I'm glad you found a lawyer.

I'll send you the file when I go back to work. The file is there unless Mr. W can forward it to you to the email you posted.

Mr. W, if you're reading this, could you send him the 101 file?

Thanks!