Ditto....My better half and I both work with law enforcement....at least make an informational report.....it will do nothing but HELP you should anything happen.

WHY HAVE YOU NOT CALLED HER PARENTS?

WHY HAVE YOU NOT ASKED YOUR H TO STOP EMAILING HER?

I dunno CP....the rents are worth a try but what if they don't believe them and the girl uses RV's husbands emails to convince them she is inocent.....or she gets angry and being a hormomal tennager gets worse with the stalking.....my preference would be police first to make sure had SOME protection....then approach the rents.

I just see a real life remake of the movie "The crush" happening.

She should definitely call the police, but I can't think of a better choice to stop her dead in her tracks than her own parents - if they are as disgusted as we are. They are friends, so they ought to be pretty decent people. Plus, they will be ashamed of her probably. She's only 18, so she still thinks like a child; believe me, I have one. At that age, they still want an adult guiding them, unless they're just a POS, and she doesn't sound quite that bad.

RV, question: Is your H like her dad in any way?

ITA

You can't afford not to nip this before it escalates. His career and your M are at risk if you stand silent.

Hopefully her parents are decent enough people to do that and not go on the defensive for her.

Still tho...someone who goes out of there way to find anothers personal info.....she doesn't drive so you know she made an effort to get there....she showed up AT the home of this man she is obsessing over in a trench coat (disguising identity) with a video camera (videos are a momento for her to keep her in the moment she can replay them as much as she likes). She also approached her "rival".
She is getting bolder....the more she gets away with the further she will take it. There is definate cause for concern...she is a very disturbed young woman. Get to the police now....then contact the parents. But police first....

I don't understand why she keeps ignoring this.

Let me tell you what's even more bizarre than that... The fact that you allow this to continue.

Your husband emailing this 18 yr. old girl and you haven't put an stop to that either!!! That's MORE bizarre. You obviously don't want to protect your marriage.

Whoa nelly.....calm down now....she hasn't even responded yet....maybe she is taking care of it right now. We don't know lets not jump to conclusions before we find out what's going on currently.

SIHW--I really wasn't trying to be disrepectful. I had just gotten off the phone with an insurance adjuster...LOL!!!

Anyway, Pepper advised I believe on 3/25 for RV to contact the girls parents. This has been a month ago yet, in a later post, RV says the following:


When in fact, her biggest fear should be her H getting/being involved with an 18 year old girl IMO.

You yourself stated that you work in law enforcement. You know this can not be good.

That would be why I suggested she go to the police and file a report FIRST. it would be on file should the girl try to come back at him about these emails....from the scene I see...the most important thing is to protect the family from harm......someone stalking there family home I see is more dangerous than the emailing....deal with the biggest issue first.....yes husband needs to stop emailing this disturbed girl......but I advise her to get protection in place to be ready for whatever outcome may come to pass.

Now I'm wondering if the girl is really 18. Maybe younger? That would explain why she hasn't acted. Since she won't respond to this question, we can only imagine.

Those darn insurance adjusters....I think they are only ever around to raise blood pressures.....hey that could be handy in an er....

Nurse: dr.....his bp is falling.
Dr: Bring in the adjuster...
Adjuster:sir your insurance will only cover half the expenses of this er visit due to your premium.
Patient: WHAT!
Nurse:he's stable...good job everyone.
Dr: my work here is done....the bill will be in the mail.
Patient: %!@%$&!#^!

SIHW...that was too funny. Gave me a good laugh. I was talking to an automobile insurance adjuster. Some little kid hit my husbands 3 week old truck and now they're jerking us around. I had to explain to the guy that they were going to pay for it either way because our insurance is with the same company as the other guys...anyways... It DOES get the blood pressure up and I'm not the most tactful person around.

But, I would be doing some kind of exposing or putting my foot up my husbands butt if he didn't stop emailing this kid. Surely if she is a student and he is a teacher at the same school, personal emails between the two should be some kind of violation. Not to mention that his boundaries are not very strong to protect his marriage.

I see your point and I agree....husband needs to put forth effort also to cut contact from this girl as his emails only fuel her obsession over him.
Luckily from what RV has stated she doe not attend the school he teaches at yet though she was talking about trying to get a transfer.

RV needs to becareful...stalker tend to escallate behaviors. After going through garbage...they most of the time will attempt to get more personal items by accessing the home itself.

The fact that she approached RV at all should be considered a direct threat.

Bump*** can't wait for update on this one...

Bump*** can't wait for update on this one...

I hope RV's been offline 'cause she's busy dealing with this-hopefully per the recommendations of the MB'ers who gave it...

In case you don't remember/are too lazy to read the original post, my husband is a musician. In June he will be playing a concert with a local youth orchestra. By some strange coincidence, the girl used to play in that same orchestra a few years ago, but stopped going. Since she was a member before, she knows where rehearsals are held and went there, trenchcoat, camera and all.

During rehearsals she was standing in a corner filming with the camera focused on my husband, the object of her obsession. When they had a break she approached him and they talked some more. She asked if he noticed the camera. He smiled and said he did. She then filmed him while he was talking to someone else. He laughed and waved at the camera. After it was all over she walked with him to his car and they exchanged a few more words. This time he didn't give her a ride, she took the train home.

When he told me all this I asked him why he kept encouraging her. Didn't he get creeped out by her randomly showing up everywhere and taping their conversations? "Come on she's not that bad," he told me. "It's actually kind of cute." He says he enjoys her fairly well. Whenever they are together she makes alot of smart [censored] comments and sometimes uses profanity. I guess she is one of those kids who was raised on South Park, The Simpsons etc. He thinks the stuff she talks about is amusing. It's like nothing she does can ever annoy him.

I will give him one more chance. Within the next few days I hope I can geta round to filing a police report without him knowing. If he describes another encounter with her, then I would notify her parents as well.

Oh dear