My XW NEVER threatened an attorney.

She just dumped me off on the side of the road and had a LSA in my face before the cold wore off.

If she was serious, you'd never see it coming.

BTW did you ask when the police were arriving?

Thanks for the words of encouragement, I need them. It didn�t take 30 minutes from the time I started sending e-mails until she called. She let me have it; I didn�t know she could cuss like that. I have got to admit though I�m skeptical; she is really a driven woman when she wants to be.
What do I do now? Do I just sit back and wait?

Are the police there yet?

Just make sure you keep that recorder handy for when she gets home to prove you haven't harmed her, in case she does pull something stupid.

The first nuclear weapon women use is a restraining order against the BH as punishment for "humiliating" them.

Women are nasty, vicious creatures.

I laughed at the police thing. Does this ever get any better?

I don't know, mine went horribly, horribly wrong.

I'll let you know if my sitch ever does....

TTF, yes, it definitely will get better.

If you can at all, just for a second, put yourself in WW place. You just dropped a huge bomb on her so-called "relationship" and have utterly and totally embarrassed her. Her wayward mind was already convincing herself that she wanted out and now she's even more angry. She "thinks" she hates you but it's just the crack screwing with her mind.

IGNORE IT. Every word. She's going to rant and rave because you are "meddling", "interfering", etc. Well good for you! You are standing up for what's right, exactly what REAL MEN do. Don't fear the waywards, they are typically harmless.

Now, having said all that, there are some women, as Pariah points out, that can be particularly vicious and will strike back with vengeance. Is that the kind of person your WW is? If so, then you need to prepare yourself. I don't see any info in your sig. Do you have kids? If so, she'll likely use those as leverage. Know your rights. If you haven't already, it's probably a good idea to talk to a lawyer, just so you know your rights. But watch out for the scumbags, they will just inflame you and get you to do something stupid.

The most important thing right now is to stay cool and calm, particularly when she comes home. It's going to be real tough and if you don't feel like you can stand it, then go out for a walk or a drive or something. Avoid LBs - its times like these when its easy to cave in and start reacting out of fear. Don't let fear control you.

BTW, "better" is a relative term. Right now, to you TTF, "better" probably means recovering the marriage, restoring the love, etc., etc.

That's what every BS wants. But then I realized that there are different interpretations of "better". Right now, "better" is all about me - making myself the better man, being the better father, showing my WW that I AM a great husband. It doesn't necessarily mean that my M is going to recover but I can wake up every morning and look in the mirror and know that I am a great person.

That's part of what Plan A is all about - making you a "better" person; someone that your WW will want to come back to. Does it always work? Of course not. But if you stick to the plan, you will be able to walk out of this nightmare with your head held high because you played the game the best you could.

Do you have a recorder? I would have it turned on as soon as she comes home. Just in case her OW is convincing her to have you kicked out of the house by telling the cops that you beat her, or rape her, or molest the kids. Chances are she'll wimp out, but if she DOES turn into a 3 headed monster, you will want proof that YOU did nothing. Video camera or voice recorder.

She is pretty strong willed but not violent. So I don�t think it will come to blows. She has been busted and is humiliated and she hates my guts right now. The thing is I don�t feel the slightest bit of remorse, this mess is hers, and this is reality. If this storybook romance of hers can survive this then I guess it was meant to be. The thing that worries me is her pride; she may keep on going just so she can say she won. If that�s the case then I am prepared to let her go.

Well, I - and several others - am more concerned that she will use the legal system against you. It is this.easy for a woman to call the cops and SAY you are hurting her or your kid, and BAM! you're out of the house and you can't do a thing about it. That's what the recorder is for. There's a poster here who, each time he swaps kids with his wife - in a public parking lot no less, he has to keep the recorder going; she keeps charging him with domestic violence and stuff.

Just a safety precaution.

DON'T STOP!! Keep it up and get er done! Your exposure is working, so get it ALL DONE TODAY. Stop taking your wife's calls.

She may be strong-willed and throw the mother of all hissies, but you my friend are the calm in the middle of the storm. She gets NO reaction out of you other than, I'm sorry you're upset. Are you hungry?

Oh, and don't let her threaten you legally. If she's in law school she may know just enough about the law to make her dangerous to herself. I've raised plenty of baby lawyers and in the beginning they know it all. So if she threatens you with ANY legal action, your response would be the same as above. If she presses it, you can say, huhhh... let me run that by my attorney and I'll get back to you. Now, are you hungry sweetie?

Good morning, well last night was fairly uneventful. WW brought hamburgers home and sat them on the table, never said a word and went to bed. I kept my mouth shut and I let her go. She said yesterday that she is filling for divorce today; I guess I will find out this evening after work if she is bluffing or not.
I have a sit down with my attorney this afternoon to start getting all my bases covered.
I have not checked my e-mail yet this morning to see if my letter writing campaign bore fruit last night. I contacted about 25 of his facebook friends and told them the truth as I see it. It�s definitely not their truth, but it is the truth none the less.

I found out yesterday that they have another rendezvous planned for New Years weekend. She is supposed to leave to go meet him at 12:00pm on the 30th. I am trying to decide the best way to handle this. My thought right now is to meet her at work on that day with our daughter and tell her that we know what she is about to do. Tell her to look into her daughters eyes and tell her where she is going and with who. I do not know the wisdom in this, but I firmly believe that the only people that can reach my wife at this point are God and my daughter. This would be a make it or break it move, one that would seal the deal one way or the other.
Thoughts?

That is a nuclear weapon.

Use it and MEAN it. You should inform her if she goes, the locks will be changed and her stuff will be on the front lawn upon her return.

Do I have any legal standing to boot her out if she goes? Because that's exactly what I will do. If I can do it and not have it used against me. I plan on having her followed and have it all documented. Would this make a difference?

Is her name on the deed?

We are currently renting, while I am remodeling a foreclosure we closed on in April. It�s under a construction loan at this time and we will have to close again in April 2010 when the work is completed. I should note that this was her dream home, where we were going to spend the rest of our lives. She started her EA around June as best as I can figure, it escalated into a PA in October. This whole time I have been working on the house alone with her coming buy just long enough to drop off something to eat. She hasn�t as much as picked up a broom since September.

Ask your lawyer when you see him/her.

I have a question: Divorce laws vary from state to state, but I think nearly every state requires some sort of waiting period for "no-fault" divorces, and "at-fault" divorces require some sort of grounds.

On what grounds would your WW file? Mental cruelty? Since you have evidence of the A, I would think she would stand to lose more than gain if it came to an all-out court fight.

I sense a major bluff here. But I'm no lawyer and I don't know the law in your state. Maybe someone else will update me?