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how the hell I`m supossed to build my marriage if my husband divorces me and he will if he finds out infidelity is a deal breaker for him. Your H has the right to kick you to the curb. You knew that before you dropped your pants for OM. That doesn't mean you get to hide this crime from him.
D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!
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he`s only been out of the country for a month.
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well if you must know the details we did not used protection we are both married and monogamus so it didnt seem necesary but there wasn`t any time to become pregnant anyways my friend came home before that. ??? Came home before what? You said you slept with the guy. The last time I checked, that was all that was necessary for a pregnancy to occur.
Me: BS/FWW: 48
BS/WH: 50
DS: 30, 27, 25
DD: 28
OC: 10
BH and I are raising my OC together.
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You just need to come clean with EVERYONE...and deal with the fallout....we can help you and your Betrayed Husband with rebuilding your M after you do that, but otherwise you are on your own.
BW me-41 WH -39 DS - 9 married 12 Yrs together(?) 18 yrs when A discovered DDay aug 2007 found MB dec 2007 Moved out april 2008 still seeing OW Plan B Okay I fixed the ages, it was looking screwy. 
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Welcome, Lokil. If you are for real and you are serious about svaing your M, I would suggest that you spend some time reading everything on this site including some other threads. Many BS on this site including myself said that adultery was a deal breaker too and ended up with fully recovered Ms that were more loving and open and honest than pre A. Dr Harley is included in that company that says an A would be the end of his M.
Even if your BH never finds out, if you have any kind of a consience at all, the guilt will eat you alive and eventually destroy your M especially if you continue the friendship with your poor friend and her cheating H.
MB is your best chance to save your M after the "mistake" you made last night. Don't bring a child into this deceitful mess without fixing it.
God's Blessings,
Say
Me, BW-57
FWH 54
4 kids and 4 grandbabies between us
In recovery since D-day, May 28,2007
FWH never onboard the MB boat but still clinging to the side.
One day at a time by God's grace.
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he didn`t finish so no chance to get pregnant.
Yeah I guess monogamus wasnt the right word but neither he or I have cheated before.
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you don't have to 'finish' to get preggo, as you prolly know.
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So, his wife came home in the middle of the act before he had a chance to "finish" and you honestly think she doesn't know something's up?
And yeah, "finishing" isn't necessary to get pregnant.
Me: BS/FWW: 48
BS/WH: 50
DS: 30, 27, 25
DD: 28
OC: 10
BH and I are raising my OC together.
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well if you must know the details we did not used protection we are both married and monogamus so it didnt seem necesary but there wasn`t any time to become pregnant anyways my friend came home before that.   No food from me.
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She didn`t know we heard the door and got dressed before she came in we had dinner and watched a movie after that.
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Um, he didn't finish so there is LESS of a chance you got pregnant.
Not to be too graphic, but pre-emissions can contain semen, just at much lower levels. All it takes is one.
Infidelity was always a deal-breaker for me, too, till it actually happened. It turned out I didn't want to throw away 9 years of my life and a secure home for our 3 children, as long as he was willing to repent.
Chances are not nearly as good for a new M with no children, however they are higher for couples that are truthful with each other than for those who try (and ultimately fail) to keep secrets. The truth will always come out eventually.
A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb Neak's Story
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No food from me. Give me your food. 
BW - me
exWH - serial cheater
2 awesome kids
Divorced 12/2011
Many a good man has failed because he had a wishbone where his backbone should have been.
We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot.
--------Eleanor Roosevelt
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I haven't read this whole thread. I really don't have to. You must tell your H and friend - PERIOD. I am a FWW, so I know this. It isn't about whether it would hurt him to know. You already hurt him. He deserves to know. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars. Tell your H. And do not say you didn't mean to. This is serious. Not an oops. Truth is the only hope you have right now. Yes, it is hard. But it is RIGHT.
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She didn`t know we heard the door and got dressed before she came in we had dinner and watched a movie after that. Wow, you dress fast. So, after half-way banging your H's friend, you then ate dinner and watched a movie with her? With friends like this, who needs enemies?
Me: BS/FWW: 48
BS/WH: 50
DS: 30, 27, 25
DD: 28
OC: 10
BH and I are raising my OC together.
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I haven't read this whole thread. I really don't have to. You must tell your H and friend - PERIOD. I am a FWW, so I know this. It isn't about whether it would hurt him to know. You already hurt him. He deserves to know. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars. Tell your H. And do not say you didn't mean to. This is serious. Not an oops. Truth is the only hope you have right now. Yes, it is hard. But it is RIGHT. I think you're right lurioosi. I take my Monopoly very seriously too.
Me: BS/FWW: 48
BS/WH: 50
DS: 30, 27, 25
DD: 28
OC: 10
BH and I are raising my OC together.
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Okay, I may not exactly be the "Sherlock Holmes" of MB, but LAST NIGHT, she has a drunken romp with her good friend's H, and yet she's up first thing this morning, tapping away on MB? What exactly does one google, post-romp, to get to MB? (Rhetorical question, actually...)
Sorry, I'm with Fred-O, Gack and Barbie on this one.
I'm still following, though. My guess is that since BH is "away" until Feb. 6th, or whenever, we'll be seeing a lot more filler posts, creative writing, and non-activity. (And no, smart-alecks, you don't need to chime in by saying that sounds a lot like TB's thread......)
I'll keep playing, though. As you were.....
TB
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I am so oblivious to figuring out who the trolls are, I guess I am gullible. You guys are good at it. What is goin on here lately. Its like the boy who cried wolf, then when someone really needs the help it is hard to believe them. Its just not right.
BW me-41 WH -39 DS - 9 married 12 Yrs together(?) 18 yrs when A discovered DDay aug 2007 found MB dec 2007 Moved out april 2008 still seeing OW Plan B Okay I fixed the ages, it was looking screwy.
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I feel terrible for what I did to my friend she is a dear friend and I wouldn`t do anything to hurt her it was a mistake if I could go back in time I would have not had sex with him.
Last edited by lokil; 01/28/10 11:49 AM.
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Yea so they were all drinking wine before the wife went out for a business meeting. So she must not have been too worried about impressing the other person, her boss you said?
And yes, you guys were not in the living room she came home, you heard her shut the door and you guys got dressed and both came out from a back room, and she wasn't like, 'hmm, whats up with that'?
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