Scotty, that must have hurt seeing them...IDK how I am gonna handle seeing WH with OW, but I hope it is as calm as you...I prolly will go home and cry after...I wonder if we give WH a little smirk and act friendly, if the OW would get mad cuz they would be suspicious...cuz they already dont trust each other, we know that.

March/09, I found cell phone calls between them starting in July/08. I confronted him and then I asked her to come and speak to me. I remember that day so vividly. At one point I said, "The biggest mistake I have made in my life was allowing Bampot to talk you out of quitting your job." She replied with a smirk on her face and said, "Do you really think he would have stopped talking to me." I wanted to PLOW her right in the mouth. I am not easily angered but when I get mad, I BLOW. I also can hold a grudge.

There are a lot of things I would have done differently if I had found MB a couple of years ago. Maybe it wouldn't have gotten this far, maybe it would have. I believe that had I not gone through all of the things I had up until I found MB, I wouldn't have been as willing to do all of the things people asked me to in their posts. I was so hopeless and depressed and I felt so lost. I found MB and it was like an answer to all of my prayers. I am so happy.

I cant believe that you didnt punch her in the mouth...I would have ended up in jail if it were me...I found MB a little later too....I did all the begging, crying and pleading and worse...I was pathetic. This forum was also my life saver. Either way we will both be fine...

Keep in mind, this was when I thought they were "just friends" but I knew there was something very very wrong with their "friendship."

I agree, we will be fine. I'm a little jealous of the people who already have a chance to start recovery. okay I gave one to myself.

Yeah, I am jealous too, Scotty...I really hope you have your chance to R your M.....I sometimes think its better when they move in with OW because I think it blows up faster...My WH just sees OW a couple times a week, so I think that keeps the A going longer...

I don't think about how it will affect the outcome of the A because I am in Plan B(okay maybe I think about it a little ). I do wonder how they can stand being together 24/7. They live together and work side by side and Bampot has given up playing pool. He LOVES playing pool. It shows me how much he had to change to be this new "thing" that he is. Oh well.

One more day until th kiddos are out of school for the summer. We are watching Superman right now. I bought all of the Superman, Xmen and Batman movies for the kids(they already had Spiderman). It's so cute watching them watch them for the first time. They are loving it so far even with the cheesy special effects.

Yup, those are my sons kinda movies....seen them all countless times...He loves them, Batman are his favorites though...I love the summer with ds...One of the batman movies my son was scared of and wouldnt watch it, he doesnt like scary at all though so your kids might be okay. It had this really creepy bagheaded guy in it...if you want Ill ask him which one when he gets home.

Hmmmmm I've watched all of them and I don't remember that guy. They were a little scared by Dark Night when they first watched it with my Mom last year, but they are over that now. DS10 talks about wanting to see the Nightmare on Elm Street movies. I told him, "No way, no how. I enjoy sleeping ALONE."

My son said it was "Batman Begins"...It was at the beginning and he might not have even been in the rest of the movie...but once my DS saw him he said "Shut if off"....and he doesnt even want to see Dark Night, it looked to scary for him in the commercials a few years ago.

Yeah, my DS is kindof a scaredy cat when it comes to movies. So if your DS wants to see Nightmare on Elm St then he is probably fine with the batman...I was scared of Nightmare on Elm St and I was a teenager, I had nightmares for weeks...

Some kids in my sons class when he was in second grade saw the "Saw" movies, I dont know what some of these parents are thinkin...although, I let my son see "kick a$$" and I kind of regretted after, it was a little too violent. It had some worse than usual swear words in it too, luckily he didnt notice...

My kids think that "stupid" and "shut up" are swear words too. HEHEHEHEHEHE.

My DS10 isn't that scared of things but he does get nightmares more than DS7 so that's why I have decided it is a no go. I couldn't even imagine someone letting their child watch the Saw movies. They creeped me out. Saw VI is a sore spot for me because that is what Bampot watched with WF. ARGH. I want my movie back.

Sorry I brought them up.....Stupid Wayward and WF!

Not your fault. They show up now and again you know. It is something I will take back. They watched it together on October30th, 2009. It was the first time Bampot ever went out and stayed out all night. It was also the day that I found MB. I thought that was funny.

How NOT romantic. During my H's first A he had to remake himself COMPLETELY into this fantasy person so OW would be impressed. Some days I fantasize about what would have happened had he run off with her. They would have lasted a few months at best. Honestly he is a pack rat to the max (bordering on hoarder) and she was a neat freak. She is well educated and he has zero confidence in his own intelligence. She was athletic and loved to do outdoor activities. His favorite activity is sleeping in front of the TV. Well...you get the picture.

The 2nd OW now that is altogether different. She is just plain living in outer space. She would have accepted him baggage and all until she got tired of him like she does all men. By that time he would have probably been as looney tunes as her.

Scotty, I sure do hope and pray your WH pulls his head out of his *ss and soon. Yours too, stilly.

Thanx Faith. I already knew that Bampot has this stick his head in the sand attitude about life. I know that he can ignore things that bug him for quite a while. That is how I knew I would be in it for the long haul. I am NOT surprised that Bampot is still not home. It is funny that you talk about your FWH's first OW. It is almost the same with WF. It is weird thinking about the person that my WH is with now. IT is so NOT who he would have ever chosen at any regular time in his life. Even though I was his first real GF(he was almost 19), I KNOW what his "type" is. WF most definitely did not fit that. I guess she had to change too.

There are a lot of issues that I am going to have to deal with when/if he comes home. I am making myself as strong as possible that I won't accept SCRAPS. I am worth MORE than SCRAPS.

That bar is going to be HIGH and I am going to need all of the 2x4's to remind me that I WILL NOT SETTLE FOR LESS. Now_what can feel free to quote me back to myself. I will welcome all of that.

There are plenty of people with loads of respect for you around here willing to swing a if necessary.

I knew I could count on you guys/gals.

Well Scotty All I can say is that in time your WH will realize he traded his marriage to an awesome woman,(albeit human), for a load of problems he will wish he didn't go to.

But that would be if he comes to his senses, and from what you describe him as a father, I have faith he will.

Untill then yes the things you are going thru will change you and make you stronger, a personal strength you will need when he comes back, for both of you.

The wait for a whole marriage is worth it, even sometimes when you see no gaurantees.

God bless and hope DS feels better

Hee hee, I just had a funny thought.

Should you decide to send one final olive branch just prior to moving on, you can give him a pool stick with a ribbon tied on, and a little note saying, "This is your final cue."

Good one Neak!

You're great Neak. At least it was good for a laff.