Seriously, does it matter what we think?

Did you read my last post?

He isn't going to change if HE DOESN"T BELIEVE HE REALLY NEEDS TO CHANGE. Please think about it.

Anna,

I�m completely and utterly baffled about why you feel you can�t do better than this? Is it a self esteem issue? Do you not deserve better? Is there something in your psyche that enjoys this drama?

I�m serious about that question. My own IC told me that women who like abusers find normal men boring. They have to shift their standards. Abusive men are exciting. The sex and drama and back and forth gets exciting for women like you and when a normal man comes along, who is stable and without massive drama, the women who like abusers feel they lack a certain �spark� between them.

Seriously, YOU are addicted to this drama. Cut it off. Go get your own deep and serious counseling and find out why you settled for a man like this and then do what you need to to avoid such a man in the future. Believe me, us �boring� guys are anything but.

I�m baffled that you�re wasting your time at such a young age and with no kids. Why do you continue to give this idiot the time of day? He�s an abuser. He�s not going to change. Say that over and over again. HE�S NOT GOING TO CHANGE. HE�S SAYING WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR SIMPLY TO BRING YOU BACK UNDER HIS CONTROL SO HE CAN RESUME CONTROLLING YOU.

End it. Put an end to the drama and walk away forever.

Get counseling. Get to the heart of why you settle for this sort of treatment. Then focus on your behavior. My IC told me that the �why� isn�t as important as the behavior. Your behavior is that you settle for being treated badly.

I�m proud that you�ve stood up for yourself, but you�re simply wasting your time. This dirtbag doesn�t deserve your attention. You�re better than this. Wake up and stop the cycle!