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(((Hope))) - Well the good news is that he filed Chap. 13, which means he has to repay his debts (or a small percentage of them). I would make sure that you are listed as a creditor.
The bad news is that the divorce case goes to automatic abatement for at least 180 days (I think) or until the BK is resolved. I believe it is possible for your attorney to ask the Bankruptcy Judge to lift the stay in order to continue your litigation. Not sure about the grounds though since you're an unsecured creditor.
As for the "Affairage"... grrrrrrrrrr..
Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage
*********************
“In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists.” Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story
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It gets harder and harder to have faith in the justice system after seeing what some of the waywards get away with.
Don't judges see this as the game it is? A ploy to live beyond means and then opt out of paying when they get in too deep or just don't want to pay.
These guys need a real serious kick in the pants.
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(((Hope))) - Well the good news is that he filed Chap. 13, which means he has to repay his debts (or a small percentage of them). I would make sure that you are listed as a creditor.
The bad news is that the divorce case goes to automatic abatement for at least 180 days (I think) or until the BK is resolved. I believe it is possible for your attorney to ask the Bankruptcy Judge to lift the stay in order to continue your litigation. Not sure about the grounds though since you're an unsecured creditor.
As for the "Affairage"... grrrrrrrrrr.. Bingo...That is the game he is playing. 180 days will get him 6 months or longer then at that point his CS will be winding down and he will replace one payment for another. I need this money towards DD college and I don't want it to take 5 years. I know he is drinking like a fish but to take $$ from your daughter for your own benefit is just lousy. I will be submitting all medical bills to the state and get reimbursed that way at least. That will not be part of the bankruptcy.
Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years
D17, D30
alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08
Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also)
H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08
Plan B 1/09
D final 12/09
Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
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It gets harder and harder to have faith in the justice system after seeing what some of the waywards get away with.
Don't judges see this as the game it is? A ploy to live beyond means and then opt out of paying when they get in too deep or just don't want to pay.
These guys need a real serious kick in the pants. I agree. I will do everything possible to recover DD money and the loan he has not paid. He is with a plastic pig but right now I am officially a bull dog. Two can play this game...More to follow!
Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years
D17, D30
alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08
Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also)
H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08
Plan B 1/09
D final 12/09
Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
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<insert evil thinking> Would like to send a heartfelt message to some of the attendees saying basically that enjoy the affairage...so sad that XH has filed bankruptcy and the ring PP is wearing is my daughter's car. Send a turkey baster and tube of KY Jelly for a gift...from the office staff.  Stay strong Hope. 
BW - me
exWH - serial cheater
2 awesome kids
Divorced 12/2011
Many a good man has failed because he had a wishbone where his backbone should have been.
We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot.
--------Eleanor Roosevelt
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Me:BW
Dday:12/31/09-Found MB 01/03/10
3DstepChildren24&20
PlanA:01/03/10
PlanB:03/25/10
D final 11/15/10
"I dare you to find some time and some place to be silent for longer than usual; a few moments, a few minutes, a few hours. Listen to your heart, listen to your soul; and most importantly, listen to the silence to see what it sounds like and how it speaks to you."
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Well, I think his free wheeling spending days are about to end with Chapter 13. I think the court takes over at that point and allows him to keep enough to pay his bills. I guess his trips to the liquor store might end unless PP pays for it.
I doubt they'll leave him enough for his monthly trips to Vegas.
BS - me 56
XWH - 57
12/25/06 - Dday - WH promised NC. Plan A in effect. Thought we were in recovery.
6-3-07 - Dday#2 Found out NC never took place and A never ended. Found MB NC promised again, but WH would not write NC letter.
9/07 - Dday #3. Still lying and sneaking around. Plan B implemented
WH wants nothing to do with me
Divorced as of 12/09 after 36 years
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Send a turkey baster and tube of KY Jelly for a gift...from the office staff. Stay strong Hope. ![[Linked Image from smileyvault.com]](http://www.smileyvault.com/albums/userpics/10404/devil2.gif)
Me:BW
Dday:12/31/09-Found MB 01/03/10
3DstepChildren24&20
PlanA:01/03/10
PlanB:03/25/10
D final 11/15/10
"I dare you to find some time and some place to be silent for longer than usual; a few moments, a few minutes, a few hours. Listen to your heart, listen to your soul; and most importantly, listen to the silence to see what it sounds like and how it speaks to you."
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Gggrrrrrr Just picked up a copy of the bankruptcy report.
XH owes big while only having a pitiful $300 in the bank. I found many discrepancies about his assets.
Wouldn't buying an engagement ring be listed as an asset? Would a million trips to Vegas be telling to a bankruptcy judge.
Can the court refuse a chapter 13 bankruptcy?
Just want the money for DD and defaulted loan.
I think karma is coming to him but unfortunately it is attached to my finances also.
If schoolbus is around I am thinking of sending a message to the wedding guests about the lucky guy coming into her family as "project F" and would like a little guidance.
shout out.
Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years
D17, D30
alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08
Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also)
H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08
Plan B 1/09
D final 12/09
Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
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I am not a lawyer, but I would assume if the ring is worth more than a certain amount that it would have to be an asset.
One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger
I will not spend my life this way.
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I am not a lawyer, but I would assume if the ring is worth more than a certain amount that it would have to be an asset. Probably not because it's not HIS ring. It would be considered a gift to OW's/PP.  Hope, I believe if you challenge his bankruptcy filing with "proof" the Judge CAN toss it out and may even take it further than that.
Last edited by princessmeggy; 09/30/10 03:18 PM.
Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage
*********************
“In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists.” Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story
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Hope, I believe if you challenge his bankruptcy filing with "proof" the Judge CAN toss it out and may even take it further than that. Me thinks so too! Have some thoughts and suggestions and will catch up with you on this. What happens if a judge tosses it out? Does he have any other options.
Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years
D17, D30
alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08
Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also)
H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08
Plan B 1/09
D final 12/09
Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
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If you meant that to me personally, I won't be home tonight. DH and I are taking my DD and grandkids to a Texas Rangers game (their 1st). My boss gave me tickets (12 rows up in the bottom section, just to the right of home plate. I'll hold up an "I heart MB" sign and wave to everyone if I get caught on camera.
Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage
*********************
“In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists.” Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story
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If you meant that to me personally, I won't be home tonight. DH and I are taking my DD and grandkids to a Texas Rangers game (their 1st). My boss gave me tickets (12 rows up in the bottom section, just to the right of home plate. I'll hold up an "I heart MB" sign and wave to everyone if I get caught on camera. You are too funny. Have a great time. I was planning on sending you an email. Trying to be a little cautious when my last thread was being invaded. Will look for the sign.
Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years
D17, D30
alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08
Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also)
H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08
Plan B 1/09
D final 12/09
Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
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Posts: 2,455
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It was a good day to come here and read Ark's "just be still". Needed that kind of positive reinforcement.
PP and XH are on their way to Vegas for the affairage on Sunday. She has a viral infection so bad that she can't talk or breathe without coughing (I swear I had nothing to do with it).
Yes, XH will be getting on the plane as a bloated, red face alcoholic with his direct report still trying to make all of this right.
On his return, bankruptcy awaits and some reality and what is left after that?
Think the karma bus will be picking them up for the beginning of the end.
DD asked to spend the day with me on Sunday. She said after church she wanted to go to lunch with me and then go to an afternoon movie and just hang out. Never brought up his name or what day. I am blessed.
Just be still.
Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years
D17, D30
alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08
Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also)
H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08
Plan B 1/09
D final 12/09
Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
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(((hope))) you ARE blessed.
I will be praying for you this weekend.
Me & DH: 28 Married 8/20/05 1DD, 9 mo. Just Lookin' and Learnin' HIYA!
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(((hope))) you ARE blessed.
I will be praying for you this weekend. Thank you for your prayers. I thought I would be become unraveled this week and start to fall apart. Feel strength, feel grace, feel His spirit. Will pray for my DDs, will pray for XH and I will remember the man he was not this Mr. Vegas. My analogy is if XH was Elvis, I would have had him in the early years, when he was handsome, talented, a mover and shaker. What PP has is Elvis in the later years, a shadow of himself, bloated, staggering about.
Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years
D17, D30
alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08
Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also)
H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08
Plan B 1/09
D final 12/09
Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
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Posts: 1,993
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You got the better Elvis. The man she has now - you don't want that man.
She's getting table scraps. That's about what she's worth.
The Lord will support you and shelter you in his arms, as long as you'll let him. You have amazing daughters. Enjoy this weekend.
Me & DH: 28 Married 8/20/05 1DD, 9 mo. Just Lookin' and Learnin' HIYA!
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The Lord will support you and shelter you in his arms, as long as you'll let him. You have amazing daughters. Enjoy this weekend. I am working on filling up my whole weekend. When I know that I have God next to me walking by my side it makes it easier to carry myself with grace. Thank you.
Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years
D17, D30
alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08
Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also)
H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08
Plan B 1/09
D final 12/09
Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
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I am working on filling up my whole weekend. When I know that I have God next to me walking by my side it makes it easier to carry myself with grace. {{{Hope}}} You are the embodiment of grace; look at the amazing DD's you have raised. You have also managed to stay cool at work, I am still amazed at that. Be sure to do lots of fun things this weekend. And remember you are a strong and worthy woman; the alien off with the PP is not the person you married. That person gave you two beautiful DD's and then went away. I will be sending good thoughts your way and thinking of you enjoying yourself. Hugs
Me:BW
Dday:12/31/09-Found MB 01/03/10
3DstepChildren24&20
PlanA:01/03/10
PlanB:03/25/10
D final 11/15/10
"I dare you to find some time and some place to be silent for longer than usual; a few moments, a few minutes, a few hours. Listen to your heart, listen to your soul; and most importantly, listen to the silence to see what it sounds like and how it speaks to you."
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