I can't think of too many mistakes I've literally vowed not to make.
THIS. Quoted for truth. That is the problem with infidelity. I was raised to honor the most sacred of vows. So was my XWW. The problem is, I DID honor them, even in the face of temptation. She did not.
It's hard to believe that someone can be trusted once they've committed the "Ultimate Sin" in marriage. And few CAN BE. It's wonderful to see some of the FWS's on here who seem genuine - but much like an addict, they have to be "in recovery" for life, with EPs in place. I see a lot of FWS's with pride seeping in, and particularly BHs on here who describe their alleged "Former" WWs who are not on board with recovery as they should be. My heart bleeds for those BSs, who are SO GOOD and so FORGIVING that they are walking towards another disaster....
Will never be there again.
I'm the one of those pain-in-the-behind people who hardly apologizes. Forgiveness can be held much in the same vein from my point of view.
If you have to apologize for it, don't do it. When I do apologize for something, it isn't for the action or intent, it is because I did so in an improper manner.
Will I forgive my FWW for falling into an A? Hmmmm. Yes. What I will not forgive is every step in which she failed to prevent it from happening. Recurrences of those actions are from this day forward, deal-breakers. Not. going. to. do. it.
I may love her unconditionally, but I'm am with her on several conditions.
