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unless he agrees to break all contact, etc. then. One week until exposure day.
want a surprise? he won't break all contact. he might tell you that he will, but rest assured the lies will continue and this will dive underground. forget "trust but verify" too. it is "don't trust AND verify." prepare for all out exposure to his job as well. that will torpedo this. he will be angry, livid, in a rage. be not afraid. that is to be expected and do not be surprised by it. if you hold back then guarantee that you will deal this the death blow that you need to. it is like cutting the chicken's head off. the chicken will run around for a some time afterward but eventually it WILL keel over and die. an A exposed to the light of day w/ the fantasy ruined does not last long. you heistate and you lose. take the shot.
OW w/ an impending D is engaged in a workplace romance w/ a married father of 4? WTF?! if she loses her job, too bad. shouldve thought twice before trying to steal someone's else H.
unless he agrees to break all contact, etc. then. One week until exposure day.
want a surprise? he won't break all contact. he might tell you that he will, but rest assured the lies will continue and this will dive underground. forget "trust but verify" too. it is "don't trust AND verify." prepare for all out exposure to his job as well. that will torpedo this. he will be angry, livid, in a rage. be not afraid. that is to be expected and do not be surprised by it. if you hold back then guarantee that you will deal this the death blow that you need to. it is like cutting the chicken's head off. the chicken will run around for a some time afterward but eventually it WILL keel over and die. an A exposed to the light of day w/ the fantasy ruined does not last long. you heistate and you lose. take the shot.
OW w/ an impending D is engaged in a workplace romance w/ a married father of 4? WTF?! if she loses her job, too bad. shouldve thought twice before trying to steal someone's else H.
Oh I see what you mean... expose anyway. Okay. Maybe I should go with this Friday idea.... although she will likely text while we are up there, not sure I want him distracted with the drama I just created in her life
Married 1/2000. D-Day 3/7/11. WH moved in with OW and they married in 2013. Single mom of 4.
My fear is that her family will not care, or that they have already propagated a story over there....
doesn't matter. light of day will do its' trick. get after her family, STBXH, friends, FB, etc. the workplace is the topper. life is not fair and you don't have to be in the fight for your marriage and your family.
While there are no guarantees, exposure is your best chance. It is no fun to carry on an affair when everyone is looking with disgust on their faces. Especially if you expose to her family. That will ruin the future of the affair with her family when they know your H is married.
My fear is that her family will not care, or that they have already propagated a story over there....
Why would this be an issue? They may not care. That does not make a difference. There will be some in her family who will not welcome a married adulterer.
And even if your H will end his affair this weekend, the affair should still be exposed. Exposure shines the light of reality onto the affair and helps the affairees see how stupid it is. His workplace needs to know regardless so they can take steps to stop the affair.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt
Look. Plan A like heck on this trip and then unload hell on the affair when you return.
An old saying around here is this.."M can survive exposure, but a M cannot survive a prolonged affair."
your WH will get over being mad, but your M will not get over an affair that drags on and on and destroys your family.
That woman wants YOUR life. She will lie and twist things around to your WH. She will do anything and everything she can to get YOUR LIFE...and that will include trying to get at YOUR KIDS.
I should know. My xh's ow/wife did that.
She had no problem with a married daddy. Nope. These types, these OW, especially one who has filed for divorce has ZERO options left.
her only option is YOUR HUSBAND AND YOUR LIFE. She is going for YOUR jugular. You beat the beotch to the punch first and go for hers!
I guarantee you, her family will want to know your information and whatever she says to your WH, is lies! It is all 100 percent lies!
Affair partners also lie to each other, and know that too.
Exposing this far and wide at the same time eliminates the affairees from getting their crack-infested heads together to come up with a fogged-out plan. Like painting you as a scorned wife or a crazy person.
Do a kick butt plan A right now. Do it! Learn what your H's top EN's are and go for that. Make home loving, warm, and inviting. Cook his favorite meals, and give him attention.
One thing I did which pissed off the ow? I gave my x a hickey. It showed her (I put it somewhere nobody else could see it) that we were intimate. Drove her bat sh*t crazy. (I loved that part). Do that! It's war girlfriend! You are declaring war on the ENEMY OF YOUR MARRIAGE AND CHILDREN. That would be the ow.
You have a baddie ow on your hands. A seriously desperate one. So I would exhaust every and any measure I could to get to her and destroy this.
Expose her and destroy the affair. Exposure is like throwing water on the wicked witch of the west. She'll melt and scream. Arrrrrgh! She will not be able to handle all the truth and the "loooove" and the "specsulness" of their affair will suddenly be sleazy and evil and everybody will she she is a total skank.
Make the beotch melt. Make the affair die. Toss some water and some truth into it!
Just like this! She is trying to throw some fire onto your house and kill your family and marriage. Make it over! Make HER MELT!
Now until the day you expose do this: 1)gather intel on everybody you will expose to and especially on HER side and to the company. 2) NOBODY must know ahead of time. it is the act of simultaneous exposure that will be like that cold water in the OW's face! and in WH's face too! 3)Plan A your butt off! Make your WH so confused he won't want to leave your side! You can do this (winkey winkey). Search out his most important EN's and focus and zero in on them.
In doing these things, you will do this! Now focus on the beotch melting and tell HER: i WILL get YOU my not so little pretty! (ok, that was totally ripped off from the Wizard of Oz!) But I do bet she has a wart and some ugly green skin!
One bit of real life advice too...OW are always a trade-down. Never as good or attractive as the real thing (you). Be confident! She's a skank-ho contaminating the petri dish of the world! Toss some truth and water on her!
Change happens by listening and then starting a dialogue with the people who are doing something you don't believe is right. ~Jane Goodall
If everyone knows, and he divorces you and marries her then EVERYONE will only think about one thing when they here your WH name and the OW name...
"They broke up a lovely family, and now the two cheaters are married"
Nothing good will come to there reality IF they marry, trust me.
Every single day they will live with the pain they have caused both sides of the families.
it wont come to that bc once you act, boom. watch the roaches scurry into the cracks and out of the light. it will be too much for them to bear. your H will be shocked.
OW w/ an impending D is engaged in a workplace romance w/ a married father of 4? WTF?! if she loses her job, too bad. shouldve thought twice before trying to steal someone's else H.
The OW is married?? If so, her H should be at the top of the exposure list.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt
3)Plan A your butt off! Make your WH so confused he won't want to leave your side! You can do this (winkey winkey). Search out his most important EN's and focus and zero in on them.
One bit of real life advice too...OW are always a trade-down. Never as good or attractive as the real thing (you). Be confident! She's a skank-ho contaminating the petri dish of the world! Toss some truth and water on her!
Unfortunately he has already gone to live with her so I won't be seeing him until Friday night when we leave.
And she IS a trade down... not to be arrogant, but even he said that. He said you sure look better but it isn't always about that. She is overweight and I am 100 pounds and with a nice figure after 4 kids. Take that skanky!!!
Married 1/2000. D-Day 3/7/11. WH moved in with OW and they married in 2013. Single mom of 4.
she will likely text while we are up there, not sure I want him distracted with the drama I just created in her life
let her text. gird yourself for lots of anger and recriminations. as for when you expose, you have to look at the pro's and con's of doing so on Fri or after the w/e.
PRO on Fri 1. shock to your H and OW before a supposedly "relaxing" family getaway. he will be beside himself w/ anger. 2. sooner the better?
CON on Fri 1. your H may very well cancel the trip or not go with you 2. need to be well thought out exposure. be detailed. i think you CAN do it.
Unfortunately he has already gone to live with her so I won't be seeing him until Friday night when we leave. no sweat. when you see him Fri night, be smoking hot. wear the things he likes. smell nice, exude sex appeal. you are leaving THIS for that?
And she IS a trade down... not to be arrogant, but even he said that. He said you sure look better but it isn't always about that. She is overweight and I am 100 pounds and with a nice figure after 4 kids. Take that skanky!!!
i heard the same thing from my WW. i lost weight, have toned up, make 3x the salary... it is SO true about the affair down. he IS blind. CLUELESS. typical of this sort of thing.
Do what you have to do to figure this out. Go over to the Operation Investigate forum and use the resources to find out his name and contact info.
TODAY, go to the OW's facebook page and copy and paste all her contacts into a WORD document. Go through her contacts and RANK the family and friends in exposure order. Rank them according to their importance to the OW, such as 1. mother, 2. dad, 3. aunt, 4, grandmother.... You get the idea. Then move onto married friends.
When you send out facebook emails, you will want to expose in that order.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt
what state do you live in? i live in CT. i googled "CT case lookup" which enabled me to look up family, criminal and civil cases in our state, which includes divorce proceedings. try it in your state. it is not hard to find it. think. where does she live? do you have friends at the company where they work? what town? yellow pages? yahoo it. if you people search on intellius lotsa times it will pull up her H's name as well. try it.
Do what you have to do to figure this out. Go over to the Operation Investigate forum and use the resources to find out his name and contact info.
TODAY, go to the OW's facebook page and copy and paste all her contacts into a WORD document. Go through her contacts and RANK the family and friends in exposure order. Rank them according to their importance to the OW, such as 1. mother, 2. dad, 3. aunt, 4, grandmother.... You get the idea. Then move onto married friends.
When you send out facebook emails, you will want to expose in that order.
I did find out whoher mom and brother are.... none of her other relatives have become apparent.... the other names I don't know from Adam, and there are a lot o them. Not sure who to choose, but can't mail all 280 of them...
Married 1/2000. D-Day 3/7/11. WH moved in with OW and they married in 2013. Single mom of 4.
hate FB btw. in a pinch you can post it on her FB page once it has been fully exposed. let her have to delete that. i wouldn't know where to begin with that.
