PM, you are priceless.

Legally can I charge her with trespassing? just a thought.

I worry that if PP shows up DD will launch a personal attack. Hoping I can get her out of the house during the exchange but knowing her she will be peeking out of the window with binoculars.

Gets me mad he can get his stuff because of the D decree but I can't get what is owed to me. The system does not work.

You COULD charge her with trespassing but it would require face-to-face contact for you to tell her to get off your property. I imagine it would get pretty heated. BUT... if they challenged you or refused, you could THEN call the police and ask them to come and remove them from the property. At that time, the police could give her a warning not to come back on the property or face arrest.

I don't know if the drama is worth it unless you could do it and remain very calm.

Oh, and heavens yes, get your DD out of there and spare her the insult.

I would put everything out front and take dd and leave the home during the time frame.

Make sure your windows and doors are locked up tight.

No drama. No engaging further.

Hope, just thinking about you tonight. How'd it go today? Did they show up? Were you able to get your DD out of there first? Please let us know.

I did not think this would affect me this much. Just seeing him at our home carrying our stuff to the pig pen.

DD17 and myself had everything outside.. She left about 15 minutes before he arrived.

I had forgotten 3 books and went to bring them outside and he was standing there. I just handed him the books and walked back inside.

PP's nephew was with him. I stayed inside. My old dog who loved XH the most spotted him from the window and started howling. It was awful. I put both dogs in the back and old dog continued to bark. XH kept looking towards the back.

I put medical receipts on top of boxes and he is looking for them in the mailbox. He is supposed to leave a check to cover these bills. He starts towards the door so I call him to tell him where receipts are before he rings the door. I asked if he wanted to see old dog which was breaking my heart. He said yes. I open front door and let her out while I stand behind door.

He spends 5 minutes with old dog and she is like a puppy doing all of her tricks. I finally open the door and old dog comes in.

XH leaves without any arguing. Strange part is he is wearing this religious bracelet and huge gold cross as if to protect him from the evil spirits -- me.

He did not take much but it feels like another void when he left. Had a good cry for a little while but went out and had a good time at friend's house.

Praying that the memories are attached to everything and will annoy PP.

Glad day is over. Thanks for your support.

You were on my mind today while I was away from my computer. Glad it's over. May the healing truly begin now.

Did he leave a check as promised?

That actually made my heart hurt for you. I'm so sorry it brought up all that old stuff. You're right though, those "things" will have attachments to them.

I'm glad you went out afterwards.

(((Hope)))

The dog missing him is sorrowful for me......our dog misses my WH lots, so I can very much relate to that part.

Hope, I have a question for you. Since your dd was a minor when you went through your divorce, how has she been able to keep no contact?

I'm having trouble with my WstbXH because he is not asking to see the children, they don't want to see him, but he has filed some kind of complaint claiming that I am preventing him from seeing them. I suspect that a judge would laugh in his face over this, but it's upsetting to both me and the kids.

Two of my three older children have had no contact for a long time. The other dd is playing him to get him to pay for things. (Every time she gets mad at him she takes a friend out to dinner on his money. She says she is getting back at him one dollar at a time.)

But, my boys are still 14 and 16 and they are concerned that they'll be forced to see their dad again.

Hope, I am so sorry you had to actually see him and deal with a situation that triggers so many emotions. Now maybe you can put everything behind and continue on a path of healing. Did he leave a check for you, so that you are not in that situation again?

The part about the dog missing him brought real tears to my eyes. Oh Hope, you are much stronger than I.

((((((hugs)))))) to all of you.

The dog seeing him brought sadness to my heart and dear memories when we were still a family. That man is gone as long he is in the pig pen with PP.

Kirby you asked about visitation. DD17 stopped seeing him almost 2 years ago and what has he done??? Nothing but complain about me influencing her.

He never took legal action or called the court appointed counselor so DD was able to just stay dark with him. In 5 months she will be 18 and he never exercised any legal right, never showed he cared enough to fight for her. Sad but true.

As far as the medical check...it was about $100 short. No surprise there. He wrote on the envelope that I gave him the new $$ figure too late and he had already got the money order. Well I gave him that figure on Thursday and the money order was purchased on Saturday. (duh). Is anyone surprised by that. Well that is fine because he did not receive his personal papers that I am trying to locate and now I can hold them till he pays up.

Next I will be back in bankruptcy court fighting his new petition trying to get out paying me in full.

Waywards are dumb. Think he needs to attend the Charlie Sheen tour and get some more tips.

{{{hope}}}
I can imagine how hard the whole scene was. So heartbreaking about the dog; it's hard for me to even mention that. I sometimes consider going back and stealing the 2 I had to leave behind. DstepD assures me that they are well; but SS is a cat person, I hope she is at least kind to the dogs.
WW's simply do not see the devastation left behind in their wake.

Through all his action (or inaction with his own.biological.children) that in the end, he is going to find the fault to be with Hope.

That is what gets me. Makes you wonder what ever happened to accountability.

Hang in there, Hope.

I am feeling better and keeping busy.

Went to a BBQ last night and it was fun. I have a good group of friends from my church but sometimes I feel OMO (Odd man out)...meaning they are mostly couples and I am by my lonesome.

In 2 months DD17 will be graduating. Whoa Whoa. My other DD will be flying in for the ceremony and stay for the party over the weekend.

I am looking forward to this achievement for DD. At the beginning of this she was crashing and she turned it around. She got honors all year, she works, she has a nice BF, she attends church even on her own. Ok she is a mess with her room and she has her teenager moments but I am so PROUD of her.

XH will probably not even know the date for the graduation. Unless something changes drastically he will miss it all.

There is no acocuntability, there is only conflict avoider hiding behinding PP.

Well - it's such an ample plastic expanse to hide behind, why not?

Seriously - they do grow up so fast. The only way to not have regrets is to not miss a thing - and you're not!

Have a wonderful time this spring with your daughters.

Hope,

I am so glad to hear that DD17 is doing so well. She sounds like a great young lady. Our DS17 (next week) is still stumbling around. He does enough work to squeak by, but no more. I don't know what will happen next year, when he is a senior and trying to figure out what to do next. This winter he has been consumed with learning how to freeride ski. He is getting pretty good - but that does not translate into a career.
Your DD seems to have some good common sense and a plan for her future.

Also glad you have friends close by who support you. What a blessing.

I feel sad for your old dog.

AM

Trying not to TJ Pheonix;

Hope;
What the heck about that diet? You meant 1500 cal a day, not 500, right?

With spring coming on It will be easier to get out and "move it, move it!"

update?

barbiecat, it is 500 calories. It is the HCG diet and it works. I am down 43# and going back on it this Saturday for 30 days. HCG is the hormone you produce when you are pregnant and lactating. So if your body thinks it is pregnant and you reduce your calorie intake drastically for a little while thenyour body goes for your fat stores. You cannot stay on it for long periods of time and you need to be under the supervision of a doctor.

Still hoping and praying.

If you want somewhere to send the weight, I'll take it. I'm down to a 5 from the 8 I was a few months ago....

Never thought I would miss being a 16.