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Lying to kids is about as mean as rearranging the furniture in the home of a blind person. You are rearranging the reality of their lives. Kids are not morons and they are not made happy or secure by illusions and falsehoods. In fact, it is terrifying to a child when your words don't line up with reality. That is how kids end up confused and full of self doubt about their own perceptions.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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P.s. If you don't tell them the truth, your wife will tell them lies and screw with their heads.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Understand one thing. You have a POSOM trying to be your dear daughters daddy and your wifes lover. If that doesnt piss you off enough to scream it from the top of her work building I dont know what will.
But for me if anyone threatens my family they had better be ready for the wrath I will unleash on them. It will be nasty , calculating, cruel and swift. I will have no mercy. Thats the mind set you had better take. The affair is the enemy not your WW.
For her its plan A with NC firmly stated and a plan of recovery as a condition to the M recovery.
Divorced 11/5/2013
FXWW EA 2005/2008/2010
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Does anyone have recomendations on the best background check site? I have done preliminary, but not much more.
Thanks!
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Divorced 11/5/2013
FXWW EA 2005/2008/2010
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Go over to the operation investigate forum here and find the thread about PI's. It is a natioanal register of PIs and you can find one in your area. Typically, a background check has cost members $300-350. Can you find this bum on Facebook? What about his phone #? do you have that? If so you can go to white pages.com and do a reverse lookup.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Does anyone have recomendations on the best background check site? I have done preliminary, but not much more.
Thanks! www.pipl.com www.peekyou.com If you have a state that he currently lives in that will narrow your search. Once you find who he is then you do a www.whitepages.com. and that usually tells you who lives in the household with them. Also at this time do not try to show her this site. She is not ready to work on the marriage. expose expose expose. I told my DD17 when she was 15 that her father was having an affair. She appreciated my honesty instead of the pack of lies he was telling her.
Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years
D17, D30
alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08
Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also)
H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08
Plan B 1/09
D final 12/09
Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
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I find search engines and a few phone calls can do wonders. But there are plenty of places to gather Intel. Wish we had a way to help the search but PMs are disabled.
Divorced 11/5/2013
FXWW EA 2005/2008/2010
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Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years
D17, D30
alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08
Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also)
H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08
Plan B 1/09
D final 12/09
Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
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Private messages between posters.I have a few nifty tools from my Real Estate web sites that runs verifications from several sources. I wish I could share. My horse is saddled up and Im ready to ride but I have nobody to chase 
Divorced 11/5/2013
FXWW EA 2005/2008/2010
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I have a name and a phone number. I have done several searches, but nothing conclusive.
Why are PM's disabled?
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To prevent inappropriate communication between posters. You can post you e-mail address. Then delete it a few hours later.
Last edited by PhrogDriver; 05/11/11 03:40 PM.
Me DH 39 WW 45 EA/PA LTR DD2 6 yrs old Divorced 2000
Cypress I believe God challenges us with every crisis. Its more than just choosing good over evil, we have to learn and grow along the way.
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I think for safety as a few people over the years harassed others. Maybe but not sure.
Name and numbers are a good start. Keep searching. Try many variations in search engines EX: name and city, name and social groups, name and social networks. Name and govt job keywording. Keyword everything you can think of.
You may have to call him yourself and play friend. I would. I would call him and tell him hey man shes all yours crap and it will give me more golf time etc etc. Befriend him for intel if you have too then smack him right between the eyes with his own divulged info. You would be surprised if approached right what he may tell you himself.But make this a last ditch effort only.
Vindictively cool and calculating.
Divorced 11/5/2013
FXWW EA 2005/2008/2010
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To prevent inappropriate communication between posters. You can post you e-mail address. Then delete it a few hours later. Correction, if I may, PhrogDriver: Do NOT post your email address in a post. The internet is a weird animal that is able to pull up things in a google search that you might not want the world to see. I've googled MB to pull up sections of Dr. H's writings, and have seen posts come up. You don't want a post to come up with your email on it. In addition, you don't want personal info that can be tied to you in a post, for example: your real name, address, names of APs or kids, etc. If you want to exchange email addresses, notify JustUss2@aol.com, the site administrator. JustUss can take care of the exchange for you.
D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!
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Okay I stand corrected. I'm a newbie, Down in AZ. The experienced posters will guide you in the right direction.
Me DH 39 WW 45 EA/PA LTR DD2 6 yrs old Divorced 2000
Cypress I believe God challenges us with every crisis. Its more than just choosing good over evil, we have to learn and grow along the way.
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Be glad to help if u send him your Addy. I hate OMs with passion. Hate hate hate. Loath. Did I say Hate?????
Divorced 11/5/2013
FXWW EA 2005/2008/2010
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I have a name and a phone number. I have done several searches, but nothing conclusive.
Why are PM's disabled? If the phone is a land line you can do a reverse lookup and get an address on whitepages.com
Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years
D17, D30
alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08
Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also)
H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08
Plan B 1/09
D final 12/09
Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
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Let us know how your research and the the moving in went.
Me DH 39 WW 45 EA/PA LTR DD2 6 yrs old Divorced 2000
Cypress I believe God challenges us with every crisis. Its more than just choosing good over evil, we have to learn and grow along the way.
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