She's now saying she could lose her job over this.

I don't know if that's true or not.

Ignore. She couldn't goad you with anger, now she's trying guilt. Ignore

Still, see if you can track them down on www.intelius.com Googling his name on that site will bring up associated names. They may work well for you in this case. If he has a business with his brother, their parents may have had a hand in helping them out financially at some point. Things like that can link up on intelius.

She is trying to turn everything onto you.
You simply revealed her cruel secret, you didn't ask her to betray you and to put her job in jeopardy when she did so.

I'm not getting back to her just yet. No replies. I'm letting this sink in and the exposure do it's work.

There is NO WAY she would want to do ANYTHING with me at this point. So Plan A will be on hold until I sense that something has changed.

This is why you should continue exposing to all 288 on the list are exposed. You are reducing the pool of contacting people that will respond negative to the affair and that can add pressure to kill the affair.

This is why you should continue exposing to all 288 on the list are exposed. You are reducing the pool of contacting people that will respond negative to the affair and that can add pressure to kill the affair.

Expose everyone on WW FB and every last one on OM FB.

You where told the need and importance to make a copy of all of WW and OM friends contact info.

Man, why you here. You're still doing things half butt. Sad, so sad.

Instead of a full out exposure from a broadside using 16" guns as on the Big MO, you're using a pop gun with a cork on a string.

Ignore.

My heart goes out to you, SW, I feel like you and I, and so many others here, are all going through the exact same thing and we can all feel the pain and hurt of it. It's definitely not a nice place to be in.

All the same, though, doing what must be done (as told by the vets here) is the best way to go. They have experience, we do not, so to follow their advice would be the very best thing you could do. I know it's hard, it's a killer for sure, but it is not like there are better options available so better to face the tough stuff then run away from it.

Keep your chin up, you are getting the best advice you will ever get.

Make sure to listen.

All the best!

I will not expose all 288 on there. Some are teenagers (friends of our kids), local businesses, etc. Some are misc that I know would not be affective. I don't want to appear crazed, just slamming everyone. I want this to be a more finely tuned attack.

I know my wife enough to know that it doesn't matter if I expose to 10 or 100. If those 10 are strategically selected, it will upset her as much as 100 unknowns.

Either way, 10 or 100, my wife is upset enough at me for exposing her A, that she most likely will never come back. But whatever, at least I will have no regrets for not trying everything to save my marriage, and not go silently into the night. That's important to me.

And you also never know what the true outcome will be.

There is no reason in the world to expose to 288 people on facebook. A strategic exposure focuses on family, close friends, and married people. You prioritize exposure targets to make the best use of your time. There is no reason to waste time exposing to kids, businesses, etc.

My wife had texted DD and said something along the lines of "Well, you've succeeded. I will stay away from everyone forever."

She's not referring to OM, she's referring to our family. Ticks me off that she's trying to make DD feel sorry for her.

Can you say DRAMA QUEEN??

Remember this?

And when the guilt doesn't work, after the anger didn't work, she'll try tears and pity.

Ignore the drama queen and keep going. Find his parents

Still do not think in terms of "Never" or "Ever" --- there have been thousands of marriages saved that are identical to your situation.

The key is here is their adultery has been able to become entrenched. Your D-Day was in July, she moved out in November, and was trying to pass him off as the new boyfriend since you both are getting divorced.

The EXPOSURE probably threw them for a complete surprise because up until that point they have been crapping and walking all over you.

Your marriage was already doomed before EXPOSURE. What EXPOSURE did was possibly bring light to it since their dirty little secret is now out in the open. OM is likely not very happy being a business owner.

Start reading Surviving an affair --- She is likely to mimic Sue in her situation.

Next -- you need to work hard this next week to cut off all money going to her ... OM needs to become her soul financier ... do whatever is necessary to not supply them.

Turn your frown upside down because this is the best chance to save your marriage.

Still,

Good job being evasive with your wife and letting it sink in, she put her own job in jeapordy not anything you did, she must have thought it was worth it. They never believe they have to be accountable my husband said the same thing........when that exposure happens they have to justify something illogical, she can't defend it she doesn't know how without sounding like a totally heartless woman......
She is still texting you and that means she still needs to be in contact with you even though she is spewing awful things.............
She knows she is in control of her future and she knows she needs to make a final choice.............
Don't answer her let her feel it Still.........
Maybe tell your daughter to not answer her for now either if it upsets her.......

Tell her the future is in her hands.......

SW, just what kind of business is this?

It's like a construction company. They do work with concrete. Concrete repair and other stuff. Mainly local government bid jobs. Been around since 1993. It's considered a small business. Probably less than 25 employees I'm guessing.

My BIL who has experience with heavy equipment drove by the business. Nothing to write home about. The equipment is old and not painted well, all color mismatched. He said it appears that they don't put any money back into the business.

Of those 288 FB friends of his do any look like business associates?