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Patience...it will come folks. 
BW - me
exWH - serial cheater
2 awesome kids
Divorced 12/2011
Many a good man has failed because he had a wishbone where his backbone should have been.
We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot.
--------Eleanor Roosevelt
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Patience...it will come folks. Thanks for the faith in the late bloomer:)
Married: 22 years Me: BW 41 Him: WH 43 Sons: 19, 17, 12 Daughter: 16 DD 8/09 EA started 8/08 PA started 7/09 Brief recovery of a few months in there. Separated 10/10 Legal Separation 8/11 Plan B 5/17/12 Plan D 5/31/12 My Story
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And at work, so can't expose right this moment anyway. It'll have to be night. I wish I drank, as some of you have suggested. I'll have to stock up on ice cream or something:) It is not ice cream or alcohol......nail polish......does not to to your head or waist.....and you feel better with pretty nails.
"Get busy living, or get busy dying"...... The Shawshank Redemption.
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Rainy
The PO is there, it has been issued. Why do you keep using it as an excuse?
For the past 4 days here are the loops you have been circling
One day you can't expose cause WH is with OW, the next day you can't expose because of PO then you can't expose because your waiting for the D and back and forth like this over and over again with moment where your checking and double and triple checking exposure technicalities with FB and all of a sudden enough evidence.
This kind of behaviour is why many have bailed out on posting to you over the past few days, it's truly frustrating to watch.
You jumped ship 1.5 years ago and did not follow the advice much to everyone's detriment who is around you.
The vets and the posters would not ask or advise you to do anything that each and every one of them have had to do themselves. We all had to expose, most of us made a huge gaping dent in the A. A lot of us killed the A that way too.
Your kids have one decent parent left to rely and look up to. Show them you are standing up for them and for yourself, teach them self respect.
You have covered every question, query and some more when it comes to exposure there is. Nothing for us to tell you on how when and why you need to do it. Go home and be the strong reliable parent your kids need and bury the witch that has stolen your family's peace. Expos� her and do it confidently and with pride.
I am totally expecting to come to MB tomorrow and find some more gibbering about why you didn't expose today etc but I'm hoping against the odds that something I or others have said will finally give you the much needed final push.
Good luck. NB - I wish I had found MB a year and a half ago - exposure then probably would have killed the A like you say. It was July, but you're right, I took another route. I'll quit asking questions and post when I'm exposing. Thanks for the pep talk - you are right about me standing up and the witch deserving to go down.
Married: 22 years Me: BW 41 Him: WH 43 Sons: 19, 17, 12 Daughter: 16 DD 8/09 EA started 8/08 PA started 7/09 Brief recovery of a few months in there. Separated 10/10 Legal Separation 8/11 Plan B 5/17/12 Plan D 5/31/12 My Story
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And at work, so can't expose right this moment anyway. It'll have to be night. I wish I drank, as some of you have suggested. I'll have to stock up on ice cream or something:) It is not ice cream or alcohol......nail polish......does not to to your head or waist.....and you feel better with pretty nails. Ah, yes! I've been meaning to do that anyway, and I would feel so much better punching the "send" button with some fiery hot pink power nails. Thank you!
Married: 22 years Me: BW 41 Him: WH 43 Sons: 19, 17, 12 Daughter: 16 DD 8/09 EA started 8/08 PA started 7/09 Brief recovery of a few months in there. Separated 10/10 Legal Separation 8/11 Plan B 5/17/12 Plan D 5/31/12 My Story
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Patience...it will come folks. Thanks for the faith in the late bloomer:) 
BW - me
exWH - serial cheater
2 awesome kids
Divorced 12/2011
Many a good man has failed because he had a wishbone where his backbone should have been.
We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot.
--------Eleanor Roosevelt
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Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 568
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Rainy
The PO is there, it has been issued. Why do you keep using it as an excuse?
For the past 4 days here are the loops you have been circling
One day you can't expose cause WH is with OW, the next day you can't expose because of PO then you can't expose because your waiting for the D and back and forth like this over and over again with moment where your checking and double and triple checking exposure technicalities with FB and all of a sudden enough evidence.
This kind of behaviour is why many have bailed out on posting to you over the past few days, it's truly frustrating to watch.
You jumped ship 1.5 years ago and did not follow the advice much to everyone's detriment who is around you.
The vets and the posters would not ask or advise you to do anything that each and every one of them have had to do themselves. We all had to expose, most of us made a huge gaping dent in the A. A lot of us killed the A that way too.
Your kids have one decent parent left to rely and look up to. Show them you are standing up for them and for yourself, teach them self respect.
You have covered every question, query and some more when it comes to exposure there is. Nothing for us to tell you on how when and why you need to do it. Go home and be the strong reliable parent your kids need and bury the witch that has stolen your family's peace. Expos� her and do it confidently and with pride.
I am totally expecting to come to MB tomorrow and find some more gibbering about why you didn't expose today etc but I'm hoping against the odds that something I or others have said will finally give you the much needed final push.
Good luck. NB - I wish I had found MB a year and a half ago - exposure then probably would have killed the A like you say. It was July, but you're right, I took another route. I'll quit asking questions and post when I'm exposing. Thanks for the pep talk - you are right about me standing up and the witch deserving to go down. And I do know the PO is there, but he has not been served with it yet, which makes a huge difference in what happens if he comes around. Maybe not the biggest thing to consider, though. Either way, I need to take her down - you're right.
Married: 22 years Me: BW 41 Him: WH 43 Sons: 19, 17, 12 Daughter: 16 DD 8/09 EA started 8/08 PA started 7/09 Brief recovery of a few months in there. Separated 10/10 Legal Separation 8/11 Plan B 5/17/12 Plan D 5/31/12 My Story
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Other than the non-existent exposure, how is your Plan B coming along? Are you maintaining NC? Have you snooped?
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING  Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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So powerful pink nails to get the exposure done.....and you are doing exposure when exactly?
"Get busy living, or get busy dying"...... The Shawshank Redemption.
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Rainysweet,
From you description OW is the Vampire who has WH under her spell, drive a stake into the Vamires heart with exposure.
Even if you don't do it to save your marriage, do it to save your childrens father, and hopefully their financial future/ ability to go to college.
It's one thing what OW did to your WH, it's an order of magnitude worse what she is doing to your children.
God Bless
Gamma
Last edited by Gamma; 05/21/12 06:00 PM.
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Rainy
The PO is there, it has been issued. Why do you keep using it as an excuse?
For the past 4 days here are the loops you have been circling
One day you can't expose cause WH is with OW, the next day you can't expose because of PO then you can't expose because your waiting for the D and back and forth like this over and over again with moment where your checking and double and triple checking exposure technicalities with FB and all of a sudden enough evidence.
This kind of behaviour is why many have bailed out on posting to you over the past few days, it's truly frustrating to watch.
You jumped ship 1.5 years ago and did not follow the advice much to everyone's detriment who is around you.
The vets and the posters would not ask or advise you to do anything that each and every one of them have had to do themselves. We all had to expose, most of us made a huge gaping dent in the A. A lot of us killed the A that way too.
Your kids have one decent parent left to rely and look up to. Show them you are standing up for them and for yourself, teach them self respect.
You have covered every question, query and some more when it comes to exposure there is. Nothing for us to tell you on how when and why you need to do it. Go home and be the strong reliable parent your kids need and bury the witch that has stolen your family's peace. Expos� her and do it confidently and with pride.
I am totally expecting to come to MB tomorrow and find some more gibbering about why you didn't expose today etc but I'm hoping against the odds that something I or others have said will finally give you the much needed final push.
Good luck. NB - I wish I had found MB a year and a half ago - exposure then probably would have killed the A like you say. It was July, but you're right, I took another route. I'll quit asking questions and post when I'm exposing. Thanks for the pep talk - you are right about me standing up and the witch deserving to go down. And I do know the PO is there, but he has not been served with it yet, which makes a huge difference in what happens if he comes around. Maybe not the biggest thing to consider, though. Either way, I need to take her down - you're right. Rainy, Whether the PO has been served or not doesn't make a difference to what happens if he comes around. The Police will respond regardless of whether he has been served. Knowing he has been served may give you some peace of mind but I really don't know whether it would influence his behaviour. I know you are stressed and worried and Iam concerned about the impact this is having on you. The frustrated posts are b/c posters care, they can see the stress and fear but they know the benefits of exposure. I can't remember the timeframe, it must be close to being served if it hasn't already been done (2/3 days - week?). I wouldn't wait until D to expose I think any advantage would be lost. Hang in there Rainy, its scary but you can do this, this is your turn to stand up and speak the truth. There is nothing wrong with telling the truth. You do have the courage, put those "hot pink power finger" to work. I have have faith in you I know you can do this. Slay the dragon! Put Skanyhola in her place. If
Me 46yrs
WH 46yrs "Isildur"
Married: 22yrs 8mths
DS 9yrs;DD 19yrs;DS 21yrs
Bomb drop:marriage not working don't know if ILY 12.11.11
DD:26.11.11
WH moves to OW house 28.11.11
Formal MB Plan A 14.4.12
Plan B 27.4.12
D:20.7.14
"There are moments in life that make us & set the course of who we become. Sometimes they're little & subtle,sometimes they're big & we never saw them coming. No one asks for their life to change, but it does. It's what we do afterwards that counts & we find out who we are."
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I wish I drank, as some of you have suggested. I'll have to stock up on ice cream or something:) There isn't any magic pill that will make you feel better before exposure!!!!! The feeling of strength arrives AFTERWARDS. Haven't you ever been sick with fear over something but done the job anyway? Just go over the top. Follow the PLAN. The plan works and your situation is the same as everyone eleses. The only difference is you're allowing his fear-making machine to operate in your mind. Just think HOW MUCH EFFORT he's put in to making you scared. As opposed to being married. HOW MUCH EFFORT has gone into making you think 'what if'? Every time you think 'what if he..' you turn him into the bogeyman and give him a piece of yourself. He's just a wayward!!! What can he do really after exposure, that he isn't capable of doing right now before exposure? He can do his worst right now, tonight and already has. So what's stopping you? Appeasement doesn't work.
What would you do if you were not afraid?
"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.
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Oh and btw.
The truth will set you free.
What would you do if you were not afraid?
"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.
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TONIGHT'S THE NIGHT!!! Dinner is cleaned up, nails are done:), finalizing prioritizing hit list.
Exposing this ridiculous rodent tramp as soon as I get the kids in bed and can settle down to work nonstop all night.
Happy thoughts and prayers appreciated:) Thanks, all!
Married: 22 years Me: BW 41 Him: WH 43 Sons: 19, 17, 12 Daughter: 16 DD 8/09 EA started 8/08 PA started 7/09 Brief recovery of a few months in there. Separated 10/10 Legal Separation 8/11 Plan B 5/17/12 Plan D 5/31/12 My Story
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TONIGHT'S THE NIGHT!!! Dinner is cleaned up, nails are done:), finalizing prioritizing hit list.
Exposing this ridiculous rodent tramp as soon as I get the kids in bed and can settle down to work nonstop all night.
Happy thoughts and prayers appreciated:) Thanks, all! You go girl, you can do it. I'm sure everyone will be thinking of you. Positive power vibes will be sent your way.  I'll keep checking in, I'm here if you need support ..... I am sure you won't I know you CAN DO IT!
Me 46yrs
WH 46yrs "Isildur"
Married: 22yrs 8mths
DS 9yrs;DD 19yrs;DS 21yrs
Bomb drop:marriage not working don't know if ILY 12.11.11
DD:26.11.11
WH moves to OW house 28.11.11
Formal MB Plan A 14.4.12
Plan B 27.4.12
D:20.7.14
"There are moments in life that make us & set the course of who we become. Sometimes they're little & subtle,sometimes they're big & we never saw them coming. No one asks for their life to change, but it does. It's what we do afterwards that counts & we find out who we are."
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Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 568
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Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 568 |
TONIGHT'S THE NIGHT!!! Dinner is cleaned up, nails are done:), finalizing prioritizing hit list.
Exposing this ridiculous rodent tramp as soon as I get the kids in bed and can settle down to work nonstop all night.
Happy thoughts and prayers appreciated:) Thanks, all! You go girl, you can do it. I'm sure everyone will be thinking of you. Positive power vibes will be sent your way. I'll keep checking in, I'm here if you need support ..... I am sure you won't I know you CAN DO IT! Thank you, happy:) Hope you are well. Thanks for the inspiration you've shared the last few days.
Married: 22 years Me: BW 41 Him: WH 43 Sons: 19, 17, 12 Daughter: 16 DD 8/09 EA started 8/08 PA started 7/09 Brief recovery of a few months in there. Separated 10/10 Legal Separation 8/11 Plan B 5/17/12 Plan D 5/31/12 My Story
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Remember this,
whatever flings back at you from exposing.....vileness or support....take it with grace and no fuel to the fire.
Releasing the truth to the world usually does result in wild response (not always) and you ride the wave it unleashed with calmness and with the understanding that factual truth is not pretty but it is necessary for potential for true growth and dignity and movement forward.
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So how did your exposure go rainy?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Oh, my. When it rains it pours. I'm just getting started. Thanks for the encouragement. Pray for me! Here goes:)
Married: 22 years Me: BW 41 Him: WH 43 Sons: 19, 17, 12 Daughter: 16 DD 8/09 EA started 8/08 PA started 7/09 Brief recovery of a few months in there. Separated 10/10 Legal Separation 8/11 Plan B 5/17/12 Plan D 5/31/12 My Story
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