Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 23 of 24 1 2 21 22 23 24
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 1,149
J
Member
Offline
Member
J
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 1,149
Hi hope!

Wow! That's soooo cool that you are going to China. Have fun!!!


johnstwin-

"I may not know what the future holds, but I know who holds my future." -Martin Luther

Remarried my FXH 25 years to the day of our first M. God is so good-and sometimes so unexpected!

Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,455
H
Member
OP Offline
Member
H
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,455
army mama nice to see you still hanging around......I am hanging tough.

I am doing well. I never say I am moving on..I just go forward one step at a time. thanks.

John's twin I am ready for an adventure. I am practicing some chinese phrases...How much? lol


Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years
D17, D30
alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08
Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also)
H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08
Plan B 1/09
D final 12/09

Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 1,116
H
Member
Offline
Member
H
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 1,116
Big hug to Hope.

She just completed a several day work session with WH and PP sitting across the table from her. She had to endure PP rubbing WH's large, large back while looking extremely nervous.

And Hope? She was pure class and intellegence. Especially as she drove off in her brand new car with WH and PP eating her dust.

I know it's difficult. But Hope is a hero for BWs!!

Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
P
Member
Offline
Member
P
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
Originally Posted by Holyheart
Big hug to Hope.

She just completed a several day work session with WH and PP sitting across the table from her. She had to endure PP rubbing WH's large, large back while looking extremely nervous.

And Hope? She was pure class and intellegence. Especially as she drove off in her brand new car with WH and PP eating her dust.

I know it's difficult. But Hope is a hero for BWs!!

hurray

Is there You Tube video? smile

Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,433
Likes: 4
B
Member
Offline
Member
B
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,433
Likes: 4
Originally Posted by Holyheart
Big hug to Hope.

She just completed a several day work session with WH and PP sitting across the table from her. She had to endure PP rubbing WH's large, large back while looking extremely nervous.

And Hope? She was pure class and intellegence. Especially as she drove off in her brand new car with WH and PP eating her dust.

I know it's difficult. But Hope is a hero for BWs!!
hug


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,455
H
Member
OP Offline
Member
H
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,455
Just checking in...thanks guys.

Yes it was a challenge being in the work event for 3 long days and having them sit across from me.

What was interesting that I was co-lead of the event so it was imperative that I was a "professional"...unlike PP who is a professional homewrecker.

First couple of days were actually tolerable. One thing that I noticed is that XH and myself still have the same traits and mirror each other. There were many times when I would put on my glasses and look over and subconsiously Ex would put his on. Or I would have my hand under my chin and yup..monkey see monkey do. Would like to figure that body language out.

Third day a switch turned on with PP and for some reason she had to "mark her territory". For her it changed from a business meeting (she added no value through the sessions) into a prom date. She started rubbing XH back, leaning into him, and the funny part he was completely unaware. I did not take the "bait' and continued on.

Amazing result is I got called in by my big boss after presenting our business results and he closes the door and thanks me for running this and knew it must be difficult and I told him I was a total professional and he says that is why I am thanking you because she was totally inappropriate. WOW...

BS can move mountains after all we have been through.


Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years
D17, D30
alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08
Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also)
H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08
Plan B 1/09
D final 12/09

Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 369
C
Member
Offline
Member
C
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 369
Hope, as usual you are the epitome of class. And if he thinks she is so inappropriate, which she is, he should just fire her finally. I would.


6 grands
DDay August 15,1998
Reconcilled Mid-Sept.1998
Husband40 FWS, Me 47 BW
Fully recovered and moving on!
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,455
H
Member
OP Offline
Member
H
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,455
thanks Cherise, I agreed totally. I have faith, I have karma, and I have patience...

I have pulled up my chair, got my bag of popcorn and watching the train wreck...

Today would have been our 25th year anniversary. Do feel robbed by the gift of adultery. I am ok though. He has given up so much for so little.

I was happy and blessed that my ex SIL came over to see my DD and myself. She is here from overseas and staying with PP and XH...We were like sisters. I knew she was here and prayed she would call because DD was hurting by her silence.
We had a wonderful visit and it was almost like old times. I have not seen her in almost 6 years first by distance and then the devastation of D. We hugged told each other we loved each other and she cried when she left. She did not say too much about staying with the affairage partner but I got the feeling she was very uncomfortable there.

Blessings


Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years
D17, D30
alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08
Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also)
H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08
Plan B 1/09
D final 12/09

Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,433
Likes: 4
B
Member
Offline
Member
B
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,433
Likes: 4
Originally Posted by hope3343
thanks Cherise, I agreed totally. I have faith, I have karma, and I have patience...

I have pulled up my chair, got my bag of popcorn and watching the train wreck...

Today would have been our 25th year anniversary. Do feel robbed by the gift of adultery. I am ok though. He has given up so much for so little.

I was happy and blessed that my ex SIL came over to see my DD and myself. She is here from overseas and staying with PP and XH...We were like sisters. I knew she was here and prayed she would call because DD was hurting by her silence.
We had a wonderful visit and it was almost like old times. I have not seen her in almost 6 years first by distance and then the devastation of D. We hugged told each other we loved each other and she cried when she left. She did not say too much about staying with the affairage partner but I got the feeling she was very uncomfortable there.

Blessings


So glad you're doing well.

Do you ever plan on trying to find another job so you can heal more?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,455
H
Member
OP Offline
Member
H
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,455
Hi Brainhurts,

Because of the economic climate and with my long long years of working there I plan on staying till I retire.

They are the uncomfortable ones. They will always be known as the boss who had an affair with his direct report.

I feel that the tides are turning and they might be the ones to go or at least one of them.

My DD is living home and going to school in town and she is my first priority and we can live pretty comfortable on what I make.

I can put up with the occasional discomfort of seeing them once in awhile.
thanks


Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years
D17, D30
alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08
Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also)
H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08
Plan B 1/09
D final 12/09

Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,433
Likes: 4
B
Member
Offline
Member
B
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,433
Likes: 4
Thanks for answering. You must be one tough cookie. smile



FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,455
H
Member
OP Offline
Member
H
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,455
I just am checking in after hearing about Chrisner passing. Great loss to all on this board. Read his posts full of wisdom.

Reading some of my old posts. What I realize is that life does go on. When you are in the throes of this you never think you will see the light. you do.

I was one of the posters who has not recovered and it was a tough pill to swallow. I know that God continues to have a plan with me even though I argued with Him many times for my way...

My life is different than what I imagined. Good most days, great some days and then there are the "off days".

My ex is still with PP in his affairage. Going off to Vegas, drinking, drinking and bloated and old looking. Someone told me that Sin ages you and I have to agree.

My DD will be my DGD in july. Yes i will be a grandma for the first time. That is exciting but bittersweet because XH will not be really involved but again it is his loss.

I am blessed in many ways and time does heal.


Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years
D17, D30
alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08
Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also)
H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08
Plan B 1/09
D final 12/09

Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 1,141
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 1,141
Early congratulations on being a grandma! Enjoy!

I know you will continue healing, and I know understand about God having a plan and it isn't my plan and I have argued with Him over my son's cancer and his suffering the last five years.
Sometimes it just is what it is, and we have to have faith.

But I know God does have a plan for you and many blessings are coming your way!

Love in Christ,
Miss M


me: FBS
H: FWS
Fully recovered
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 2,589
A
Member
Offline
Member
A
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 2,589
Hope,

Thanks for the update. I had been wondering how you are doing. You sound well. Congratulations on the upcoming grandbaby.


AM


BW - 70
WH - 65
M - 35 years
D-day - 17 Apr 08
H broke contact 11/1/09
Back in love after the worst thing that every happened to us.
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,433
Likes: 4
B
Member
Offline
Member
B
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,433
Likes: 4
hurray congratulations on the Grandbaby.


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,455
H
Member
OP Offline
Member
H
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,455
So glad there are posters here who remember me and my story! (you know the story no one wants to happen or tell!)

{{{Miss M, Brainhurts, Armymama}}}

I still see many familiar names and so sad to see all the new open wounds of infidelity with the newbies seeking an answer.

It is a holy war and destroying families.
I have a blessed live with my grandbaby girl coming this summer and i am involved very much with volunteering at the animal control which fills much of my time.

Still do not date even though this "old girl" has been asked out but just not interested and maybe never will.
Some people think that finding a new relationship is the answer but some feel finding ourselves is ok too.

Blessings...


Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years
D17, D30
alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08
Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also)
H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08
Plan B 1/09
D final 12/09

Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
Q
Member
Offline
Member
Q
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
Hi Hope.....


BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 2,589
A
Member
Offline
Member
A
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 2,589
{{{Hope}}} back at you.


BW - 70
WH - 65
M - 35 years
D-day - 17 Apr 08
H broke contact 11/1/09
Back in love after the worst thing that every happened to us.
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,455
H
Member
OP Offline
Member
H
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,455
"Queenie" love ya


Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years
D17, D30
alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08
Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also)
H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08
Plan B 1/09
D final 12/09

Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
J
Member
Offline
Member
J
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
Hope why dont you quit the job and move?

Page 23 of 24 1 2 21 22 23 24

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
0 members (), 1,116 guests, and 67 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
Mike69, petercgeelan, Zorya, Reyna98, Nofoguy
71,829 Registered Users
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 1995-2019, Marriage Builders®. All Rights Reserved.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5