Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 27 of 36 1 2 25 26 27 28 29 35 36
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
Originally Posted by Letty
Originally Posted by SunnyDinTX
And...instead of the pastor's comments making us squirm, it made H squeeze my hand and me look at him and smile. smile

that's a sweet place to be in, sunny. good for you! yes, the hard work does help really build a marriage, doesn't it?

these days, so many people just fly off and move on, always wondering why nothing lasts for them. i heard someone today say, "we just fell out of love." of course, he was talking about just HIM, not WE. i'm so glad you two have made it through to the other side. it just keeps getting better.

so...hot enough for ya? i saw a photo today of a horse laying in its water trough! i hope poor colorado is able to get the fire under control.

Yes, it IS a very sweet place to be in!

I think marital views have changed over the past several decades where people are more willing to walk away than work things out. Society is just so focused on immediate gratification. And don't you just love how waywards use the word "WE" when talking about "falling out of love" and such? So frustrating.

And YES...it's WAAAAY too hot. I hate summer. You know how some people have the winter blues? Not me - I have summer blues. lol. I have no energy when it's this dang hot. Although - I know you're struggling with it being too cold right now. Wanna trade??? smile


"The #1 reason why people give up so quickly is because they tend to look at how far they still have to go, rather than how far they've gotten."

Me, FBW(46) H, FWH (43)
M - 21 yrs & counting
D (20)
S (18)
S (16)
Surviving and Thriving since November 2010 thanks to MB!
My Recovery Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2538986#Post2538986
My Original Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2457141&page=1

Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
I haven't posted in awhile - not much going on here in Sunnyville!

I am a little down these days because I have 3 herniated disks in my upper spine/neck area and I can't do much of anything! frown My days are all scheduled around daily appointments with the chiropractor for traction - not a lot of fun. I've not posted about it because I'm trying not to focus on it but I'm getting exasperated!

Yesterday I sent H an email saying how it was frustrating me to not be able to do anything: I feel like I am an invalid and I don't like it! It's kinda depressing... He sent me a short but encouraging note back.

I am praying that this darn traction stuff works. My right hand and fingers have been numb for over a month now! The daily traction is not a fun process; it is causing soreness and other non-fun stuff like the inability to sleep... But...I have to deal with it for now because it's supposed to work, long term. (I definitely want to avoid surgery!)

I'm trying hard to stay positive and still meet H's needs and not commit lovebusters by being cranky. lol.

A few months ago I would have loved some down time...but now that I have it....I hate it!!!! LOL (OK, so...it's not exactly the down time I would have imagined. I'm sure that makes a difference!)

Anyway, this is just life sometimes and I know other people have more serious health issues to deal with so I am remaining thankful. I just need to keep my mind busy and not focused on what I can't do at the moment.


"The #1 reason why people give up so quickly is because they tend to look at how far they still have to go, rather than how far they've gotten."

Me, FBW(46) H, FWH (43)
M - 21 yrs & counting
D (20)
S (18)
S (16)
Surviving and Thriving since November 2010 thanks to MB!
My Recovery Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2538986#Post2538986
My Original Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2457141&page=1

Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 6,870
C
Member
Offline
Member
C
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 6,870
Jeez Sunny have missed you and sorry you had to end up in traction so you would come back wink

But seriously I hope you feel better soon and are jumping hurdles ASAP

Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
Originally Posted by ConstantProcess
Jeez Sunny have missed you and sorry you had to end up in traction so you would come back wink

But seriously I hope you feel better soon and are jumping hurdles ASAP

Thanks, CP!!!! smile I've been posting here and there on other threads, just not as much going on in my own sitch - which is a GOOD thing!!! smile

Hmmm... I've never actually done hurdles but maybe I should put that on my "after traction" list of things to do!!!


"The #1 reason why people give up so quickly is because they tend to look at how far they still have to go, rather than how far they've gotten."

Me, FBW(46) H, FWH (43)
M - 21 yrs & counting
D (20)
S (18)
S (16)
Surviving and Thriving since November 2010 thanks to MB!
My Recovery Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2538986#Post2538986
My Original Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2457141&page=1

Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
Call all techies - or at least one techie...
smile

Can someone tell me how to do my links (on my signature) where you just make the statement "link to thread" the link???

THANKS!!!!!


"The #1 reason why people give up so quickly is because they tend to look at how far they still have to go, rather than how far they've gotten."

Me, FBW(46) H, FWH (43)
M - 21 yrs & counting
D (20)
S (18)
S (16)
Surviving and Thriving since November 2010 thanks to MB!
My Recovery Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2538986#Post2538986
My Original Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2457141&page=1

Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,440
Likes: 4
B
Member
Offline
Member
B
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,440
Likes: 4
Originally Posted by SunnyDinTX
Call all techies - or at least one techie...
smile

Can someone tell me how to do my links (on my signature) where you just make the statement "link to thread" the link???

THANKS!!!!!
Do you have the button that shows "create a link to webpage"?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,440
Likes: 4
B
Member
Offline
Member
B
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,440
Likes: 4
Also if you want to just copy it from here.

Recovery Thread
Original Thread


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
Originally Posted by BrainHurts
Originally Posted by SunnyDinTX
Call all techies - or at least one techie...
smile

Can someone tell me how to do my links (on my signature) where you just make the statement "link to thread" the link???

THANKS!!!!!
Do you have the button that shows "create a link to webpage"?

I KNEW you would help, BH!!!! smile

No, I don't have the "create a link to webpage" button... so I'll copy and paste it from your 2nd post. THANK YOU!!!!!!!

Although, I suppose I should learn, lol. I can google it and follow directions though.


"The #1 reason why people give up so quickly is because they tend to look at how far they still have to go, rather than how far they've gotten."

Me, FBW(46) H, FWH (43)
M - 21 yrs & counting
D (20)
S (18)
S (16)
Surviving and Thriving since November 2010 thanks to MB!
My Recovery Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2538986#Post2538986
My Original Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2457141&page=1

Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
Well...darn.

I tried copying and pasting and it didn't work. When I first tried, it copied the words but not the links.

The second time I selected "copy link location" and it copied the links but not the words.

OK... I'm a smart cookie, I SHOULD be able to figure this out, but still! smirk



"The #1 reason why people give up so quickly is because they tend to look at how far they still have to go, rather than how far they've gotten."

Me, FBW(46) H, FWH (43)
M - 21 yrs & counting
D (20)
S (18)
S (16)
Surviving and Thriving since November 2010 thanks to MB!
My Recovery Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2538986#Post2538986
My Original Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2457141&page=1

Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 3,066
E
Member
Offline
Member
E
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 3,066
Maybe one of these will work?

link = Makes the given url into a link.
link = Makes the given title into a hyperlink pointing to link

so in title you would put Recovery thread and the url would be the link. maybe?

Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
Originally Posted by Rocketqueen
Maybe one of these will work?

link = Makes the given url into a link.
link = Makes the given title into a hyperlink pointing to link

so in title you would put Recovery thread and the url would be the link. maybe?

I'll try that. Thanks, RQ! And keep us up to date with where you're at. I've read Kiss' thread... sounds like you've made no bones about wanting him to step it up. Good on you.


"The #1 reason why people give up so quickly is because they tend to look at how far they still have to go, rather than how far they've gotten."

Me, FBW(46) H, FWH (43)
M - 21 yrs & counting
D (20)
S (18)
S (16)
Surviving and Thriving since November 2010 thanks to MB!
My Recovery Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2538986#Post2538986
My Original Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2457141&page=1

Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 3,066
E
Member
Offline
Member
E
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 3,066
Thanks Sunny

Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 1,232
L
Member
Offline
Member
L
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 1,232
hey, sunny, i saw your post awhile back about your discs, and that you're going to a chiropractor. have you ever heard of an osteopath? i visit one (and so does H) as needed, and they are like magic! no cracking of backs necessary. i know that osteos aren't too popular there (i had never heard of them before moving here), but mine tells me that there is an osteo association there, so there must be some! our insurance covers osteo visits as well (and so does ACC, our national accident health cover, when it's accident-related).

with my lupus, i often have fibro pain, and periodically (like now), when i'm under a great amount of stress, my neck and shoulders tighten up like boulders, affecting my lower back as well. with 2-6 visits, i'm back in prime shape! my osteo also practices eastern-style stuff too, like chinese cupping.

i cannot recommend them more highly! do have a look around and give one a try if you can. you may find more pain relief, and better management of your disc problem, without any additional pain via the visit.


fBW 49
xWH 55
DD 22
DDay 6/07
D 8/15
Letting Go
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
I haven't checked into an osteopath, Letty. Sounds interesting! Right now I'm doing this traction therapy called Vax-D. You go for 25 straight days (excluding weekends) and they put you on a special traction table. Every day they increase the amount. After traction you do electrode and ice treatment, followed by ultrasound and massage. So far it has helped me improve, but I hate having to go daily. Makes me feel like an old person, scheduling my life around dr appts. LOL.

I'll be done in 2 weeks with traction and then I think I'm supposed to do stretching and physical therapy.

BUT... I'm always up for looking into alternative ways of doing things.

Thanks for the suggestion!


"The #1 reason why people give up so quickly is because they tend to look at how far they still have to go, rather than how far they've gotten."

Me, FBW(46) H, FWH (43)
M - 21 yrs & counting
D (20)
S (18)
S (16)
Surviving and Thriving since November 2010 thanks to MB!
My Recovery Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2538986#Post2538986
My Original Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2457141&page=1

Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
On another note...

I will confess that all this disk stuff has made me a lot less active than I'd like to be. I see a bit of depression sneaking in, which I don't like at all.

The physical issues make it harder to be the best wife and mom I can be: it limits the way I can meet H's needs. He is understanding, of course, and we work well together on making sure those needs are met. It's just a downer to me; I've gotten used to being the vibrant person I want to be and I have felt I've been knocked back a bit.



"The #1 reason why people give up so quickly is because they tend to look at how far they still have to go, rather than how far they've gotten."

Me, FBW(46) H, FWH (43)
M - 21 yrs & counting
D (20)
S (18)
S (16)
Surviving and Thriving since November 2010 thanks to MB!
My Recovery Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2538986#Post2538986
My Original Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2457141&page=1

Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 3,197
U
Member
Offline
Member
U
Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 3,197
H has several medical issues too, including a disc issue in his lower back which he is going to eventually have surgery for.

It definitely works against recovery, it is hard enough to keep your spirits up when you are fighting infidelity, but then to add constant pain on top of that.

Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
Originally Posted by unwritten
H has several medical issues too, including a disc issue in his lower back which he is going to eventually have surgery for.

It definitely works against recovery, it is hard enough to keep your spirits up when you are fighting infidelity, but then to add constant pain on top of that.

Yep. Fortunately we are far enough into recovery that I don't get a lot of triggers these days over the A. (Although, depression can bring on those triggers so I'm trying to monitor that! I've had depression in the past so I'm very cognizant that if I need to go back on meds, to do so if I fall into that pit again.) Always important to keep in mind the long term goals in situations like this.

Last edited by SunnyDinTX; 08/08/12 12:39 PM.

"The #1 reason why people give up so quickly is because they tend to look at how far they still have to go, rather than how far they've gotten."

Me, FBW(46) H, FWH (43)
M - 21 yrs & counting
D (20)
S (18)
S (16)
Surviving and Thriving since November 2010 thanks to MB!
My Recovery Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2538986#Post2538986
My Original Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2457141&page=1

Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 1,232
L
Member
Offline
Member
L
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 1,232
yes, unfortunately, there are times where we have to acquiesce to our bodies' needs, and it does suck! i, too, worry about not being able to need meet when sick. had a little butterfly just last night about not making dinner, as i was in bed napping with this flare up! but, you know, sickness and in health, right? laugh

do check into the osteopath. you'll be pleasantly surprised, i think!

oh chronic pain - that's something i know too much about! the trick is to manage it, and stay away from narcotics unless you have a super-bad flare up. those drugs are too addictive, and doctors hand them out far too freely.


fBW 49
xWH 55
DD 22
DDay 6/07
D 8/15
Letting Go
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,529
Originally Posted by Letty
yes, unfortunately, there are times where we have to acquiesce to our bodies' needs, and it does suck! i, too, worry about not being able to need meet when sick. had a little butterfly just last night about not making dinner, as i was in bed napping with this flare up! but, you know, sickness and in health, right? laugh

do check into the osteopath. you'll be pleasantly surprised, i think!

oh chronic pain - that's something i know too much about! the trick is to manage it, and stay away from narcotics unless you have a super-bad flare up. those drugs are too addictive, and doctors hand them out far too freely.

Yeah, I'm not one to take meds unless I absolutely have to. I turned down going on any narcotics but did opt for one medication that will help with the nerve issues I'm having - after CAREFULLY checking it out. Because of the specific disks that are out of whack, I have had numbness and tingling in my arm and fingers - so it helps with that.


"The #1 reason why people give up so quickly is because they tend to look at how far they still have to go, rather than how far they've gotten."

Me, FBW(46) H, FWH (43)
M - 21 yrs & counting
D (20)
S (18)
S (16)
Surviving and Thriving since November 2010 thanks to MB!
My Recovery Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2538986#Post2538986
My Original Thread: http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2457141&page=1

Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 6,870
C
Member
Offline
Member
C
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 6,870
Yeah the cronic pain versus the narcotics choice, only have one opinion on that, with many attitudes within that also

Of course getting rid of the pain is desirable, but why wouldn't it be? It's pain

I remember being 13 when I started dealing with cronic pain from an accident and realizing what happened in my thoughts and emotions was much worse and depressing than I wanted to experience, so I took the pain unless I couldn't sleep

It surprised me how many people would choose oblivious deadening over honest suffering of pain, and even seek that feeling

If they could only use a drug that would effect just the pain but not our emotions, but that is also unrealistic, because pain effects our emotions

Sorry you have to deal with this Gals, and glad you are responsible enough to take them only when you have to

Page 27 of 36 1 2 25 26 27 28 29 35 36

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
2 members (2 invisible), 476 guests, and 72 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
Bibbyryan860, Ian T, SadNewYorker, Jay Handlooms, GrenHeil
71,839 Registered Users
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 1995-2019, Marriage Builders®. All Rights Reserved.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5