|
|
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
Member
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239 |
If you like you can email Dr Harley directly for advice
Typically he places child safety above marital recovery
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 154
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 154 |
The implied custody is that specified in restraining order. Final custody would have to be determined in a custody hearing, separate from restraining order hearing. It is still a bit confusing to me and am trying to clarify with lawyer.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239 |
Civil order of custody is what I have.
You want the police order. It carries a lot more weight
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239 |
If you drop the restraining order, she will possibly get the kids and get an order against you.
So for the sake of your kids don't drop it
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 154
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 154 |
The legal counselor brought up that if my wife is represented by a lawyer tomorrow, they may propose what is called civil restraint. It can be similar in terms to a restraining order but is not enforced by police if it i broken. Instead if one party vilated civil restraint, the other party has to file a motion with the court and then monitary restitution is paid.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239 |
The legal counselor brought up that if my wife is represented by a lawyer tomorrow, they may propose what is called civil restraint. It can be similar in terms to a restraining order but is not enforced by police if it i broken. Instead if one party vilated civil restraint, the other party has to file a motion with the court and then monitary restitution is paid. Then you need to tell the judge: "I need protection because she is violent towards me"
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 154
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 154 |
How do I get to e-mail Dr. Harley directly?
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239 |
How do I get to e-mail Dr. Harley directly? Send your email to: mbradio@marriagebuilders.com. Include your phone number so he can call you if needed.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 154
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 154 |
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,440 Likes: 4
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,440 Likes: 4 |
How do I get to e-mail Dr. Harley directly?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 154
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 154 |
In my state restraining orders are permanent, they are not reviewed or renewed as in some other states. Though my online research shows that they can be vacated by the court given certain criteria. It is likely that much time would have to pass and would admit to not fearing her anymore. I am considering adjournment to give more time t plan and think. I could not take them out of state though during adjournment.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 154
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 154 |
The other consideration have to make is if I don't finalize RO and pursue custody, I may not get custody if WW comes up with enough on me to keep that from happening. I have heard that courts generally side with mother in custody cases.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 154
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 154 |
What are your thoughts on whether or not taking kids to my parents would be best for kids.Financially it is right now because they would help with childcare. But I am concerned about lovebusting in their home.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239 |
I don't think the court will allow you to leave the state, possibly not the county.
I suggest you contact the local welfare agencies for assistance
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239 |
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 154
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 154 |
I do not regularly attend church, though my kids go to religious education. My wife had been teaching my son's religious ed class. I don't know if she is able to still teach with her pending charges. She did not teach last Sunday, according to my son.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2012
Posts: 707
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Oct 2012
Posts: 707 |
What are your thoughts on whether or not taking kids to my parents would be best for kids.Financially it is right now because they would help with childcare. But I am concerned about lovebusting in their home. Just a quick clarification: In Marriage Builders terminology, "lovebusting" and "lovebusters" refer to behaviors which can diminish feelings of romantic love between spouses. Since the terms refer to behaviors within the context of a romantic relationship, they don't apply to parent/child relationships.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239 |
I do not regularly attend church, though my kids go to religious education. My wife had been teaching my son's religious ed class. I don't know if she is able to still teach with her pending charges. She did not teach last Sunday, according to my son. Have you exposed her affair to the church and religous ed parents? If not do so immediately. I encourage you to reach out to a church, one that has family programs. They can help you, as they have I, with raising kids
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
If you like you can email Dr Harley directly for advice
Typically he places child safety above marital recovery This is correct. Protect your children first. You don't have to email Dr Harley to find that out, he is very clear on that.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239 |
What are your thoughts on whether or not taking kids to my parents would be best for kids.Financially it is right now because they would help with childcare. But I am concerned about lovebusting in their home. Just a quick clarification: In Marriage Builders terminology, "lovebusting" and "lovebusters" refer to behaviors which can diminish feelings of romantic love between spouses. Since the terms refer to behaviors within the context of a romantic relationship, they don't apply to parent/child relationships. Actually the terms apply to the behavior. In the article below, Harley describes the child's behavior as "Love Busting" The term is not exclusive to married couples. http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi5031b_qa.html
|
|
|
Moderated by Ariel, BerlinMB, Denali, Fordude, IrishGreen, MBeliever, MBsurvivor, MBSync, McLovin, Mizar, PhoenixMB, Toujours
|
0 members (),
827
guests, and
50
robots. |
|
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
|
|
