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Did you ask the attorney about taking out money to safeguard it against the POSOM and your Husbands affair spending? Heck..... He is paying her in cash and you don't even know how much.
She said I should take half.
Can YOU fire her?
No, I do not have that right as a single member LLC.
Isn't the business half yours too?
Yes, I just took copies of the purchase contract.
M: 47 H: 52
H asked for divorce: 3/31/15
H Moved out: 4/7/15
H Took divorce off the table: 4/17/15
I filed for divorce: 5/18/15
I entered Plan B: 5/21/15
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Are you going to go back to the bank and withdraw your half?
Was the amount you took out this morning just for general household expenses, like food and utility bills?
Now, go back and take out AT LEAST 50% of the remaining balance, since the other funds were for marital expenses like food and utilities. I would take it all at this point.
Did you contact the utility companies to get the bills in YOUR name only?
Stay busy!!! That way you won't fall as deep into depression or anxiety attacks.
Have you contacted of Your friends to be with you yet?
Hang in there. You WILL get through this.
LTL
Last edited by LearnedTooLate; 05/15/15 01:45 PM.
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I just called the bank, and the balance went from $7112. this morning, to $4156.51 because of some checks that came in, one being a big one to the food vender, and he will have another one coming in from a different one too.
That means I'd get a whole whopping $2300. It's not worth it to me to go through the verbal abuse I'm going to get from him. I don't know how much he's taking out before he deposits, I have no proof. But the business had a great weekend last weekend because of the holiday, and these next weeks won't be so busy.
I'm not making excuses, and yes, I should have taken it earlier, but I didn't, emotionally I just couldn't do it.
M: 47 H: 52
H asked for divorce: 3/31/15
H Moved out: 4/7/15
H Took divorce off the table: 4/17/15
I filed for divorce: 5/18/15
I entered Plan B: 5/21/15
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Do you have family or a close friend who can come over? No, all of my family is 4 hours away, and I just don't have any support system here. Everyone is married, and always so busy. That is what's making this so difficult.
M: 47 H: 52
H asked for divorce: 3/31/15
H Moved out: 4/7/15
H Took divorce off the table: 4/17/15
I filed for divorce: 5/18/15
I entered Plan B: 5/21/15
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Posts: 350
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Did you contact the utility companies to get the bills in YOUR name only? No, he won't shut them down, he's to busy whoring around. He can't even balance his books, or pay his bills.
M: 47 H: 52
H asked for divorce: 3/31/15
H Moved out: 4/7/15
H Took divorce off the table: 4/17/15
I filed for divorce: 5/18/15
I entered Plan B: 5/21/15
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Sounds green. Can you find a lawyer more experienced with contentious separation and divorces? You need to stress you expect financial irresponsibility and require protection. Thank you indiegirl.:) When I told my friends who I was going to this morning, when they came over today to change my locks, they described her as a "divorce shark". She's very good.......and very expensive!
M: 47 H: 52
H asked for divorce: 3/31/15
H Moved out: 4/7/15
H Took divorce off the table: 4/17/15
I filed for divorce: 5/18/15
I entered Plan B: 5/21/15
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Posts: 350
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Sorry to tell you but your business is already damaged and your WH will likely sink it. Running a restaurant (even under the best circumstances) is an extremely rough business. I know it is. He said to me last night he was going to lose it just to prove to me that I (me) don't care about it. Foolish statement, but I believe it to be true, simply because I think he's to overwhelmed by it, and he's to busy being infatuated with OW. A month ago he was given the paperwork, check, and all the paperwork/account book for the restaurant. He hasn't gone through any of it, and of course blamed me for it. And he is a lazy, delusional wayward. Yup, right now he is. He used to be THE hardest working man I know! The business loan you mentioned...is that a fixed loan or do you have a line of credit? If you have a line of credit you can write a check from that. There is no business loan right now. It's what he wants to do to buy the business outright, instead of having it on the land contract that it's on. He'll never do it though, the income isn't there for the bank to want to take it on.
M: 47 H: 52
H asked for divorce: 3/31/15
H Moved out: 4/7/15
H Took divorce off the table: 4/17/15
I filed for divorce: 5/18/15
I entered Plan B: 5/21/15
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It is great to see you come here and start to take control of your life. I remember how scary a waywards anger can be and the doubt it brings on.
Stick with us. Your WH is at a huge disadvantage because we have all been here and we have his number. His bullying and scare tactics are typical. He has no plan and his fantasy is falling apart. So yes he is angry.
You, on the other hand, have found a gold mine of experience and wisdom with MB. The reason there are so many long term posters here is because this place saved us. I am pretty sure that I would be institutionalized by now if I had not found MB.
Remember, if a waywards lips are moving than he is lying. So stop listening to him and take his power away.
Trust only what you can personally verify.
You WILL get through this and you will come out a stronger person. Hang in there. Cool, calm and in control...unlike the waywards. Thank you for such kind words!! 
M: 47 H: 52
H asked for divorce: 3/31/15
H Moved out: 4/7/15
H Took divorce off the table: 4/17/15
I filed for divorce: 5/18/15
I entered Plan B: 5/21/15
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Nearly every single one of her contacts has messaged me with a terribly nasty message! Cool. A woman with no true friend is a pushover of a foe. You find this with the truly nasty habitual type OW. And truly nasty she is indeed! What's really funny.......I mean seriously FUNNY, is the lawyer knew exactly who she was when I told her. She rolled her eyes, smirked, and said "THAT'S WHO IT IS!!!???" 
M: 47 H: 52
H asked for divorce: 3/31/15
H Moved out: 4/7/15
H Took divorce off the table: 4/17/15
I filed for divorce: 5/18/15
I entered Plan B: 5/21/15
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I just got back from the bank, and attorney. The attorney really was of no help, because unless I go into legal separation, I can't do anything. You need to go into legal separation and get legal protection. Otherwise you will find yourself in the street. I called my lawyer back, and I asked her if she could walk me through some financial scenarios with that. She knows my H is controlling the funds, and she will help me as best she can. I will then decide if it's possible.
M: 47 H: 52
H asked for divorce: 3/31/15
H Moved out: 4/7/15
H Took divorce off the table: 4/17/15
I filed for divorce: 5/18/15
I entered Plan B: 5/21/15
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Posts: 350
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Posts: 350 |
My husband was just here, banging on the doors to let him in. He wouldn't leave, or stop banging, he said "open the door, or I will," so I called the sheriff.
He brought OW with him, and they loaded things up from the garage, decor, our boat, and took it with them.
M: 47 H: 52
H asked for divorce: 3/31/15
H Moved out: 4/7/15
H Took divorce off the table: 4/17/15
I filed for divorce: 5/18/15
I entered Plan B: 5/21/15
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Posts: 350
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He told the police about the emails that were sent out last night, and they said if it continues, I will be fined.
I honestly believe this is a hopeless case now.
Last edited by Ginger872; 05/15/15 06:56 PM.
M: 47 H: 52
H asked for divorce: 3/31/15
H Moved out: 4/7/15
H Took divorce off the table: 4/17/15
I filed for divorce: 5/18/15
I entered Plan B: 5/21/15
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Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
He told the police about the emails that were sent out last night, and they said if it continues, I will be fined.
I honestly believe this is a hopeless case now. You cannot be "fined" for telling the truth in America. There is no such charge, so don't worry. And I want to assure you that this was hopeless yesterday. By exposing you gained a small glimmer of hope. But it is still a long shot.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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I honestly feel this was completely the wrong route to take. At least he was civil before. Now he's just hateful, and he won't care what he does to me.
He's coming next week to fix the front of the garage, and I think it's pretty much guaranteed he will put the house up for sale.
M: 47 H: 52
H asked for divorce: 3/31/15
H Moved out: 4/7/15
H Took divorce off the table: 4/17/15
I filed for divorce: 5/18/15
I entered Plan B: 5/21/15
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He brought OW with him, and they loaded things up from the garage, decor, our boat, and took it with them. I would also file a restraining order against this brazen, vile skank. How DARE she come to your home?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Posts: 350
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Yes, I'm sure she was just drooling coming up our driveway, hoping one day this will all be hers. 
M: 47 H: 52
H asked for divorce: 3/31/15
H Moved out: 4/7/15
H Took divorce off the table: 4/17/15
I filed for divorce: 5/18/15
I entered Plan B: 5/21/15
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Posts: 350
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Posts: 350 |
He was just FURIOUS with me!
M: 47 H: 52
H asked for divorce: 3/31/15
H Moved out: 4/7/15
H Took divorce off the table: 4/17/15
I filed for divorce: 5/18/15
I entered Plan B: 5/21/15
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Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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I honestly feel this was completely the wrong route to take. At least he was civil before. Now he's just hateful, and he won't care what he does to me. You feel this way because you believed you were getting some where by cooperating with his plan to wreck your marriage. Your way did nothing but enable his affair. He liked that set up because he had his affair and a compliant, cooperative wife. As you surely know, that was not working. By exposing, you caused great conflict in the affair. See, our goal is to save your marriage. Your goal was to avoid his anger at all cost. We have entirely different goals. If you are not making a cheater angry by fighting for your marriage, you have no hope at all. He's coming next week to fix the front of the garage, and I think it's pretty much guaranteed he will put the house up for sale. He cant put the house up for sale without your signature.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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He was just FURIOUS with me! Why would that be? 
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Posts: 350
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Thank you, Melody, you always calm me down. I just don't want to be tossed aside like a piece of useless dirty old carpet. That's what it feels like he's doing, and this is definitely pushing him closer to her. The good thing is, he's really showing her his anger right now.
I still can't believe he brought her here! His obvious goal was to hurt me.
M: 47 H: 52
H asked for divorce: 3/31/15
H Moved out: 4/7/15
H Took divorce off the table: 4/17/15
I filed for divorce: 5/18/15
I entered Plan B: 5/21/15
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