Let's see - for general translation purposes, whenever a wayward speaks, you can usually think this:

1. I want what I want when I want it.
2. I will blame the BS when I feel like it, and it doesn't mean much to me. In fact, it doesn't mean much at all.
3. I am out to satisfy my own wants. Whenever anyone else gets in the way of that goal, that person is attempting to "judge" me. "Judging" is now "bad", and therefore, if you are in the way of me and my wants, YOU are "bad".
4. Nobody understands me unless they are someone who supports my wants. In that case, they are a "good" person, and they are not "judging" me. They "understand" me, and they are my "friend". Probably, this person is my affair partner.
5. I absolutely cannot and will not listen to anyone who has had any experience with anything remotely like this experience - because MY experience is very unique and special, and I am therefore very unique and special among all human beings who has ever lived and who will ever live.


So, basically, unless you are talking to your REAL spouse, pretty much....

don't listen. Because what the wayward spouse has to say is self-driven.

Unless you have someone who can analyze the message and pull out the pieces that can help you, just step away from the mess and protect yourself.

SB