**EDIT**

I don't know what else to do.. I feel that this is an impossible, daunting task.

Prowl, I can see why you feel that this is hopeless. The reason Melody brought up exposure again, is because nothing ever happened to break up, or cause trouble in her original affair. That man, whoever he may be, has had absolutely no consequences for the damage he has done to your family. I can tell that from how your wife reacted to threatening you not to expose him or else, she still has feelings for the man. No matter what she tells you.

Even though you treated her in a way that was unacceptable, you can change, and you can show her that you are capable of being a loving caring husband, and keep telling her that you want to build a marriage that both of you will feel safe and secure. You need to expose that OM ASAP, and then continue to show WW, that you love your family.

It is doubtful that the way you got the info is actually illegal, especially if you are in the US.

^^that was to encourage youth expose.

I figured out her email password and hacked her email.. It's definitely not legal. I've spoken to my L about it and he said I probably shouldn't have done that.

I could lose my job and go to jail... She has the proof that I did. IP address don't lie.

I would love to expose this but I am worried about the repercussions.

Your lawyer does not know what he is talking about. You could have found the page open. Happens all the time. She is not going to know you guessed her password.


There is no IP address connected with a hack into someone's email. Besides, if you did this at home, the IP address you used would be the same one she uses.



Time to get your brave boots on.

None of this is illegal in the US. Her computer is marital property. You have every right to see how your property is being used.

You may be thinking too much like a LEO. But you are not acting in that capacity. You have no need for a warrant to investigate in this situation.

Well I have been out of the house for over 6 months and we have restraining orders against each other. I looked at her email on my work computer. Definitely something I could get in trouble for.

As for the IP address, GMail does have an option to see where your email was opened from. She has sent me the screen shot.

This makes a huge difference. Was the protective order related to stalking or domestic violence? Did you access the account from her residence or yours?

Based on what you have shared, i would not expose anything from the email you hacked into.

So I just found out that the man my W has been bringing to my house, and telling the kids it's her friend from work, is actually the man I found in the pictures last week!!! She's been telling the kids it's her friend "B" because if they told me I wouldn't suspect anything. I showed my S8 a picture of "B" tonight and he said "That isn't "B". So I showed him a picture of OM and he said "Yea that's "B". But his name isn't "B"!! It's OM that I found a picture of her and him together.

I called her and confronted her with this... She played way nice! Told me that she even wanted to try and go to lunch with me next week... 10 minutes before this conversation she was telling me she couldn't stand me and didn't want ti even talk to me. Funny how her attitude changed once I discovered that the OM has been in my house and introduced to my kids as a different name...

Prowl, are you going to expose or are you going to continue to dance when she says dance?

What on EARTH are you confronting her for? She already knows she is having an affair!

While you dilly dally your kids are exposed to the OM and this is very unsafe. Thanks to the RO you can't simply move home and protect your kids. You could have lifted this ages ago with PI evidence.

Are you willing to finally expose and run this guy off? You should also be gathering evidence to overturn the RO and get full custody.

While your kids are in danger it is ridiculous to be scared of getting caught looking at emails.

Use PI evidence to expose if you have to. It will take two days.

You will not get anywhere with gold stars from your wife.

Oh.. very important. Go to his FB page and copy all his contacts into a word doc before he blocks you.

This is very important since you have tipped your hand before exposure.

This guy doesn't have a FB page... At lease not one I can find. I've even had friends try and look him up and he just doesn't exist. The only reason I discovered his first and last name in the first place was because he was following my W on soundcloud. He doesn't exist on there anymore either. He only has a linkedin account that I can find.

Prowl, The reason she became instantly nice, is because she is afraid of him being exposed. Just like you have been told from the beginning, the reason you have never had a chance at making love bank deposits is because this man is in the background. Do you see now that he has never really been gone? The affair has just become more and more entrenched.

If you will expose this man, you have a chance of recovering your marriage. You don�t need to use the emails as proof. Just find out everything you can about him, and expose to everyone you can prove that he knows. Tell them that he is having an affair with your wife, and you have proof. If you just let this sit without exposing, then you will never have a chance.

Prowl,

I understand you may be concerned about exposure because of the restraining orders but you have a right to expose to anyone who you are not explicitly forbidden to contact by the restraining order against you.

So if the RO covers only harassment towards your wife, it is not unlawful for you to expose to her family, as they are also your family. Your lawyer may have concerns but if he has cajones he will understand that it is only reasonable and due diligence for a man in your situation to appeal to his wife's family for help. Not every lawyer will have cajones or good sense about this.

Also it sounds like you and your wife are communicating despite the RO. I hope you are documenting every time she contacts you because each time she initiates contact it makes any future legal argument she may make that you're harassing her very weak. Someone who's claiming to be stalked does NOT contact their alleged stalker, and you need to be documenting and stockpiling all communications she sends to you in case she tries to pull this on you down the road. I'm advising you on this from personal experience.

You didn't answer my questions about the email, and depending on the answers the email might become a problem for you down the road, but you can't change or worry about that now. You need to fight this, and the fact that you've managed to get an RO against her is a good cushion for you in case she tries to make this nasty. It will probably make the situation look less serious to a judge.

There are lots of ways to track somebody down but the simplest in this case is to have a PI follow him. Once he has a name and address you'll also need a background check on this guy since he has access to your kids.

So very, very often the OM is a pretty bad dude. Even if the WW has had traditionally good taste. I'm not at all reassured by the fact he uses ghostly social media accounts to sniff for married women.

Have you tried looking for people with the same name in the area?