Of course it is wassy , I've been telling this all along <P>It's what should always have been done but we never got the instructions booklet on time. But we can do it from now on.<BR>Funny thing is that if we think about it it's something that comes almost naturally to everybody, we just have so many things on our plate that there's a tendency to forget. <P>Anyway, glad you had a good time... carefull with those donoughts though - raving from a prednisone victim, that is gaining weight just from breathing , I'll be off at the end of the month finally! -.<P>Lecture will follow tonight - if I can keep my eyes open for that long - or tomorrow <BR>School concert number 2 over and done with. One more to come next week.<P>Hugs<BR>Kat

Yes Ma'am<BR>Now I remember where I heard it.<BR>I'll pay better attention next time.<BR> <BR>Am I forgiven?

Wassi -<P>You do make me laugh....<P>Smack me too, then!!!!<P>Yep, Plan A is definitely a way of life!!! <P>I also have questioned why H would have to do anything difficult when I am also so easily pleased!!!!<P>Still and all, I would rather be this way then someone who has to constantly be a challenge. I couldn't pretend to be for very long either.....could you? Nope, didn't think so!!!<P>They don't know how easy they have it - that's all there is to it Wassi!!!!<P>Hugs,<P>Sheba

WS....Buddy,<BR>Some more Food for thought, besides the doughnuts!<BR>Remember I was talking about writing things down for him that you need??? They say they know, but yet they forget? Well.... my H, can't remember what he was to get at the store, so I send him with a note. My H can't remember the Garbage night.....soooo, well that one didn't work, cause I take it out then.....forget that one!!! ......My H dosen't remember alot of things...so I write notes and put them on the floor infront of the fish tank. Soooooo... my point being....bottom line....write him a letter telling him what you need. MAKE COPIES incase he forgets what he did with it!!!!!!!!!!!!! We have taken such good care of them, given them advice, done their thinking for them, and now, they can't function.....and we wonder why? <BR>Just rambling here..........I vote for the frying pan! <P>AH<P>-------<BR>TIME :-)

Sheba<BR>I don't do very good pretending at anything.<BR>Maybe that's why I'm crazy.<P>AH<BR>Dear friend!<BR>You will help me write it down without lovebusters?<BR>I know what you are saying is what I need to do.<BR>Thank you!!!!!!<BR>And thank you for that card I got in my E-mail today.

WS:<P>I've been thinking that if I were as high maintenance as the XOW was, perhaps I would get what she got from my spouse-his jumping through hoops to please her, going to great lengths to be with her.<P>But then, on further examination, I realize he became weary of the XOW's demands and complaints, and came to appreciate my love for simple pleasures and the fact that burgundy beans could blow my dress up as well!<P>Keep on, WS. You're doing a grand.<P>Blessings and prayers<P>=^^= catnip

Hey catnip <BR>I was out all day so just saw your message.<BR>I think being high maintenance would be a pain wouldn't it?<BR>Not worth it at all.<BR>Bimbo was very high maintenance you know. She has lupus. She almost had to have her hands amputated. Kidney removed, the whole story. Yet she ran around the country sleeping with any man she could find and drinking. <BR>Such a sad story. Couldn't get a man to commit to her because they weren't willing to settle down with someone so ill.<BR> <P>I'm glad I'm not the only one who gets excited over the little pleasures like burgandy beans.

WS...thinking of you...I have my own little divet. I think my accident is catching up with me. Believe it or not yesterday I forgot my password to MB.<P>My gut, call it primal, reaction in times of crisis is not to trust anyone. How sad. I was never like that before. I guess it has some value, though. I wasn't living in reality before. <P>In a fallen world, no one but the good Lord himself is really trustworthy.<P>Vows and promises may be sincere when made, but how ridiculous for us to believe them when we are human.<P>On the other hand, I know my fidelity is true.<P>Of course we must press on. Some days it is just harder than others.

Hi Wassy,<P>Since I did that tactic on Tony he has not done it since. But then I think deep down he hates being proven that he is acting like a spoiled brat. That helps.<P>Oh to be a high maintenance chick. I think that would be nice for a day or two a year. : ) Too bad Tony is high maintenance. ; )<P>Wassy I am doing fine. Taking it one day at a time. I close on my house May 26th. Ugghhh if that does not kill me than the new job will finish me off. Tony is just going to have to take up and do the majority of the poroblem solving for a change. I need a break from the stress.<P>How are you holding up? Are things better?

FHL<BR>That is one of the saddest results of all of this. I know exactly what you are talking about with the trust thing. I'm not sure that it affects everyone but I am like you. I hate it. I go down the street on a normal day and am suspicious of perfect strangers with the "bimbo" look. <BR>This, my friend, is something we may have to examine. I know you don't want that feeling either.<P>Paha<BR>I'm going to go back and read your thread.<BR>you sound like you are taking some major control in your life. Good!<BR>I'm somewhat better now that H is home. I know there are things that need to be addressed though.<P>Take care!!

I like to be high maintenance, oh, every 3rd day and PMS time...and most Sundays, and you can count on Thursday...LOL. The rest of the time I'm just sweet as pie.<P>Really, I feel like there isn't much use in wanting anything, I'm not going to get it. Ohh. Grumpy today. More coffee.

Lor<BR>You make me laugh. <BR>I've been watching you give for over a year now. How could you be high maintenance?<P>Did you ever notice that most OWs don't have a clue how to give?<BR>I remember telling my H that I got really tired of giving and giving to him while he gave and gave to her and she just took!<BR>I guess I'll have a coffee with you. A little grumpy myself.<BR>

Hello again wasstuborn;<P>Thought I'd get back to you on this thread too, give my 1 1/2 cents worth (thats 2, less inflation).<P>It's just not OW that are often high maintainance, OP's are natoriously the same. My W's OM had her fly out to him at her expense, she bought the restaraunt meals, he lived in her condo while in town all amenities included and when he moved in with her he paid for 1/2 the groceries but no rent, no taxes nor upkeep on her unit (a condo that I'd paid for). He didn't look for a job and prided himself in being unemployed. He did pay for the hotel room for their trysts early in the affair. His excuse: his practice was doing badly and he was going bankrupt.<P>In my opinion all OPs are takers BIG TIME, emotionally and mentally constipated and morally bankrupt. They are all users. This is why over 80% of OP relationships don't last and the original partner starts to look a lot better. The time it takes for this to happen is variable and is a killer to the betrayed's mind, heart, soul and physical well being. <P>Patience is the answer but it's hard to maintain patience when you're up to your nose in the middle of a sewer lagoon with crocodiles biting at your privates!<P>Better days to come all, it's promised in the Good Book.

LooksGood<BR>Yep!<BR>This one I pegged as a user 7 years before she actually slept with my H.<BR>They aren't all that way but I'd bet on a good majority of them. <BR>So maybe our spouses need to give and we aren't very good at taking? I know that is often true here. <BR>My councelor from Pluto didn't agree with me on that one so I know it must be at least partially correct.