Then what are you still doing posting here on MB about your "going nowhere marriage"? You aren't marriage building. You are stalling, lying, DJing, and basically separating yourself from your wife. Whether she chooses to MB or not does NOT affect how you make changes in yourself. You are choosing to not change -- and it has nothing to do with remaining with your children. Call a spade a spade.

This continued "update" you give is given for what purpose hold? Any reason at all?

As you've stated, you've no intention of making the journey to a healthy life/marriage. So why continue to post about the exchanges between you and Mrs. Hold? It serves no purpose other than to continue to get people to engage you and then you can tell them how you think this about Mrs. Hold and how you think that about Mrs. Hold. But when called to task, you project -- you deflect. No matter the great insight someone gives you about what YOU are doing in your exchanges with your wife, you dismiss them as "not gonna happen cuz she did...and I won't...". You do this with your wife and you do this with your children.

The two are not mutually exclusive even while you want to believe it. Your children see and hear more than you know. They also are smart and intuitive. Give them credit for knowing more than what little you have told them. Of the parties involved, I feel most for your children because of the lies being "told" to them. What about that are you going to change? They didn't choose to be put in this position, but they sure deserve a parent willing to help them understand it.