Hold -

See if there's a Krav Maga studio anywhere in your area. There was nothing like it for venting my aggression before my knee wouldn't let me do it anymore.

I also have battled depression for a long time, and can relate to many of your statements. I add my voice to the chorus encouraging you to seek help. The new AD's work so much better than what I was on 10 years ago, combined with IC, it's made a world of difference for me and my outlook.

Best of luck to you!

"When people show you who they are, believe them." -- Maya Angelou