One woman who is tall and very thin mentioned that she felt heavy and thought she had a few pounds to lose. I was surprised and asked her if these thoughts had been present throughout her life. She said they had. I was again surprised, since she is, as I said, tall and thin with a flat stomach and a small butt and I could not imagine that she was worried about her weight. In fact, on occassion I have heard her make self-deprecating comments about the small size of her chest, and I would have thought her concerns, if any, would have been in the opposite direction.

I then mentioned an article I read in which an avowedly feminist woman wrote something like "how can women be expected to compete with men at the workplace when women are constantly distracted by worrying about their weight". I suggested this was one of the most anti-feminist statements I had ever read. Not just because of what it says about women's fragility. But also because, no matter how debilitating it is for women to constantly be worried about the size of their butts, men are just as distracted and deterred by thinking about each of the women they pass in the hallway, what she would be like in bed, whether she would consent to having sex with him, and the humbling realization for most men that in the overwhelming majority of cases, the answer would be no.

The women were shocked to think that men are this easily distracted. One of the other husbands confirmed that he was distracted, but not as easily deterred as me. This merely confirmed his wife's opinion that he is a sexist oaf, with an overly inflated sense of his attractiveness to women. The other women asked me if I really found it so hurtful and depressing to think that most women would not want me. I said I did. And Mrs. Hold said what I quoted previously.


No. Are you nuts?!?! Talk about our sex life with friends? We don't even talk about our sex life with each other any more. I got tired of complaining. She got tired of hearing me complain. So now I just take whatever hugs and eag squeezes she offers and keep my disappointment to myself.

Last night she asked why I have seemed so cheerful lately. Do any of you think that my posts over the past few weeks indicate I am FEELING cheerful? I am apparently a VERY good actor. That, and I leveled up and unlocked a new gun and a new perk on Modern Warfare 2 last night.