No, I do not want to practice asking. That is what I do NOT want to practice. Asked plenty for many years. Got shot down. I try hard not to ask directly anymore.

I don't assume Mrs. Hold is unhappy overall. I am not bothered if she is. She may be happy. Perhaps truly happy. Perhaps telling herself she is happy to avoid feeling obligated to change things. Because she doesn't want to leave, either. Perhaps she is unhappy. In my view, deservedly so.

However, she feels, I am not doing things to help increase her happiness in the hopes she will reciprocate and meet my needs. There are plenty of times I "hear" her asking for more of my time and attention. I feel bad if I give in to her. I feel good if I reject her. That is a lousy way to feel.

I am the one who is unhappy. And I intend to stay this way. Which is why I am so depressed and distressed. I am making crazy choices. Knowingly. With no intention of stopping.