Originally Posted By: Telly
It is much easier to hate yourself and stay mired down in the muck of what a loser you are... to be dark and depressed... than it is to untangle the mess and deal with the anger than is most likely seething within you.

Actually, I believe the exact opposite, at least with respect to the long term. It is much easier to create excuses in our mind as to how difficult or hard something may be in the short term when the truth is that change is not nearly as difficult as we all tend to make it out to be, and we discount how much better our lives will be over the long term in the process. As a result, we live with long term pain and unhappiness, rather than endure short term adversity/uncertainty that most likely results in long term happiness/contentment. IMHO it is really much harder on us to continue to hate ourselves, our choices, than it is to improve ourselves and adapt. Why do something hard when something easy is available right? Trouble is, what we oftentimes think is the easy road is in fact not the easy road long term. We choose what may seem easy in the short term, but with long term adverse consequences that result in depression, anxiety, and bitterness. We must take the road less traveled and change if we want a chance at contentment IMHO.

It CAN be different. YOU can be different, without a lobotomy, and without ECT.

And I'd add without near as much effort as you believe it will take, if you can adopt a mindset that eliminates the excuses beforehand, i.e. it's hard, it's too expensive, it takes too long, my family won't accept me, etc. Change is difficult because we believe it is difficult, we are our own worst enemies within our our minds (internal dialogue) for the most part IME - at least I know I am when it comes to my own life.

Last edited by HitchHiker; 04/08/10 02:30 PM.

God Bless,


All I want to do is learn to think like God thinks. , I want to know Gods thoughts; all the rest are just details. , When the solution is simple, God is answering. - Albert Einstein

INTJ married to an ENFJ