The only one who DOESN'T see it as a charade is you Hold.

Unfortunately, from my limited vantage, you are simply teaching your children that your (and ultimately THEIR) needs are not valid and therefore they will feel compelled to relive what they have known. ie YOUR life.

I feel for you, because SF is a huge factor for me and one of the leading reasons I initially LOVED my wife... and one of the biggest reasons we are getting divorced. I make no apology for my desire for her, but you YOURSELF posted links to 2 articles a couple years back on my thread. I read them and broke down, because those articles were stating things exactly how I felt.

However, now you are disregarding those articles, and taking on a victim role. Stating things which make me believe that you have forgotten the essence of the articles. It is that MEN in general, and some men in particular, get a huge amount of LOVE from making love. When that is gone... it is GONE!

IMO... your children would be much better off with a divorced dad who had a spine and could teach them how to have their needs met rather than a doormat who teaches them that their needs are not worthy of being met.

Harsh... I know... but I am talking to MYSELF as much as YOU