Try to look at it another way, Hold:

Be thankful your wife is not as negative as you are. Be thankful that she is still thankful for something. You can be Radically Honest about the fact that things are good for her, and the children, and for you, but things could be a lot better for both of you, and what is missing is largely within her control. She has the power to make things better. You have to think about things better, and recognize the positive when it is there and seize it as an opportunity to Complain Politely.