Originally Posted by Gerkaguards
So my next move is to just write another casual, chatty email on Saturday, with a post script saying, "I understand that you feel like giving up on our marriage, but I don't, and I'll continue to try to be the best husband I can be."

I'd hold off on relationship chat on the email. You told her where you stood. There is no need to rehash it again so soon.

As for why she wanted the D waiver signed, I view it as one of two reasons:

1) She needs it signed for some reason.
2) She just got reprimanded and is wanting to lash out at you as a result.

For reason 1, I would defer to RIF. I don't see how signing the waiver would help her with anything other than an easy divorce. Maybe she's one of those relationship jumpers that just wants to hurry up and jump into a new relationship because she no longer has someone to meet her needs.

For reason 2, I could see if she just got reprimanded, a vitriolic email just isn't enough to let you know all the hate she has for you, so she needs to convey over the phone all her craziness. It's no fun to tear into someone if you can't hear their reaction. You haven't been responding to her provocations in her emails, so maybe calling you on the phone would provoke you.

Either way, just keep doing what you are doing. You are in a better place than you were just a few weeks ago. You have a NC order in place, and your WW is not only responding to your emails, she is calling you up. I see her requesting the waiver as a way for her to save face, a way to quickly run away, move on, and act like nothing ever happened, and you were just a crazy, jealous, a-hole. She's afraid of you reengaging her in the relationship, thereby confirming it was she who was the bad guy in the relationship not you, after she had spun all these stories to those around her about you that weren't true.

As for the false accusations against an officer, how does she plan to prove you lied about something that actually happened? That would be a mistake, like Roger Clemens suing Brian McNamee for slander. She would just open herself up to a whole can of worms she would not want to deal with. It was a very hollow and easily seen through threat. I just find it comical.


BS - 32 (me)
FWW - 33
Married 8/31/03
No kids (but 3 cats)
D-Days - 8/25/06 (EA), 11/3/06 (PA)
NC agreed to - 11/8/06
NC broken - 11/28/06, 12/16/06, 1/18/07, 1/26/07, 1/27/07
Status - In Recovery
Jim's Story