She said nothing I do works for her. She said sometimes she had felt something in the past. But pretty much only when she was drunk or stoned. She said "there is something physically wrong with me and I need to see the doctor".

I replied "if you feel something when you are drunk, sound to me like the wiring is working to carry signals to your brain. Seems to me more likely that it is psychological. That your brain refuses to listen to the signals because it thinks sex is bad and wrong and not to be enjoyed. Except when you are drunk, and your brain can't clamp down tightly enough, or focus enough, so the signals leak through and you feel them."

She said "but how can it be psychological when I sometimes had sex with guys I didn't like".

I said "that was you trying to take control of your sexuality. To prove you could choose to do it when you chose. That you had a choice."

Amazing that she is finally sharing this with me. Not sure she is ready to do anything about it. But I feel she is finally sharing her true sexuality with me. Hurts to hear that she never feels anything with me. But better to hear the hurtful stuff than to be shut out.

When you can see it coming, duck!