i think your current posture is brilliant. You don't have to talk to her and a it ticks her off no end. I think making ANY response other than lawyers will open you up. It also gives her a win. DON't DO IT!
The problem with the letter is that, to maintain your integrity, it treats her with too much respect. Given your state of mind, I think you will feel like a sap for sending it. It's not a Plan B letter, so what is it's purpose?
You had a painful discussion with her followed up by the lovely gift of service on your anniversary.
Let THAT be your closure. You never have to talk to this trash again. That's what lawyers are for...

Last edited by kerala; 08/12/10 11:28 PM.